After Being Reborn, I Had A Bad Ending With My First Love. - Chapter 11

In her previous life.

Yan Sui and Yu Shuli had attended the same university.

She hadn’t wanted to go too far from home, so when she filled out her college application, she chose a Double First-Class university nearby in Sushan. Yu Shuli had underperformed in the college entrance exam—his score was much lower than his mock exams. After much deliberation, he also ended up applying to the same university as her.

They were at the same school, but in different departments. Yu Yunxi was a classmate Yu Shuli had met through his club.

As Yu Shuli’s girlfriend, Yan Sui had met Yu Yunxi a few times during club gatherings, but they weren’t close.

At that time, Yan Sui was busy working part-time after classes to earn money. Even the time she spent with Yu Shuli slipped through the cracks between her fingers, let alone getting to know his friends or keeping track of his social life.

She only learned about Yu Yunxi through her roommates.

One of her roommates had also gone to No. 1 High School. When she learned that Yan Sui’s boyfriend knew Yu Yunxi, she whispered mysteriously to Yan Sui:

“Sui Sui, I think you should keep an eye on your boyfriend and Yu Yunxi!”

Yan Sui frowned slightly at her roommate’s words.

“Back in high school, there were already rumors about Yu Yunxi. They said she used her looks and her family’s connections to get close to other people’s boyfriends. I just think—since your boyfriend is in the same club as her, they’ll inevitably interact. And you’re not around him much. You should probably watch out.”

When she first heard this, Yan Sui didn’t believe Yu Shuli would ever betray her, nor did she like listening to vague, unsubstantiated gossip about another girl.

So she only shook her head lightly and said:

“You said it yourself—it’s just a rumor. Let’s not spread it. Spreading rumors about a girl isn’t good for her.”

But she hadn’t expected her roommate’s “reminder” to one day become reality.

As graduation season approached, many campus couples broke up because of uncertainty about their future paths. Yan Sui hadn’t expected she and Yu Shuli to become one of them.

That day was calm—perhaps they’d both seen it coming. They sat in the café where she worked. She still had her barista apron tied around her waist. For once, they weren’t sitting side by side but across from each other, staring quietly into one another’s eyes.

After a long silence, Yu Shuli finally spoke. He wanted to break up. He said he wanted someone more “suitable.”

That someone… was Yu Yunxi.

Yan Sui didn’t break down or hysterically ask him why. She only looked at him for a long time before curving her lips into a faint smile—half resigned, half bitter—and said softly:

“Okay.”

Yu Shuli seemed to have predicted this reaction. Or perhaps they just knew each other too well. Still, he added one more line:

“It’s not because of you—it’s me. I’m too tired, Yan Sui. I overestimated my willpower. I can’t handle this kind of life anymore. It’s my fault, not yours.”

Yan Sui gave a quiet “Mm,” then picked up the coffee she had brewed for herself and took a sip.

She didn’t like coffee—it was far too bitter.

But when Yu Shuli came to see her that day, she had somehow anticipated it and made herself a cup.

Yes, it was still bitter. But the bitterness of the coffee seemed to mask the bitterness in her heart.

After setting down the cup, she looked up at him with a smile tugging at her lips.

“I know I’m good, and I know you’re good. Go live the life you want.”

The breakup didn’t seem to affect her much. She continued her days of part-time jobs and sending out résumés. It was as if Yu Shuli’s departure was nothing more than losing a tiny, insignificant thing—not worth her emotions.

Her roommates all said she had a strong core. Even after her boyfriend cheated and chose another girl, abandoning her, she didn’t show a trace of anger.

The roommate who had warned her before sighed:

“Well, now that Yu Shuli is with Yu Yunxi, he’ll probably go straight into her family’s company after graduation. Pretty smart of him—he’s secured his future. But it’s a shame he wasted all those years of yours.”

For once, Yan Sui didn’t argue back.

Maybe her roommate had been right. But she also knew she had no right to stop someone from chasing a better future.

Yu Shuli hadn’t technically cheated, but he had abandoned her for his own ambitions.

For most, that would be unforgivable. Her roommates and siblings were furious on her behalf. Her younger brother Yan Jiaping even wanted to confront Yu Shuli, but Yan Sui stopped him.

She shook her head and said simply:

“Forget it. It’s only human nature.”

Her own life was already mired in hardship. She was struggling to climb out of the mud, but she was still at the bottom.

It was only natural that Yu Shuli didn’t want the same life.

Just as she’d said: it was human nature.

Seeing that she wasn’t crushed by the breakup—if anything, she seemed even more driven, waking early every day for part-time jobs or interviews, returning at night to research companies—her roommates marveled.

“Even something like this can’t knock her down. Yan Sui’s heart must be made of steel.”

…

But nobody knew that when she received her first successful interview email, the joy that should have lit her face never came. Instead, something inside her snapped.

Alone in the dorm, she hunched over her desk and cried endlessly.

It was graduation season, and the dorm was empty—her roommates were all out interviewing. In the emptiness, she finally allowed herself to let go, sobbing without restraint.

Memories of her time with Yu Shuli flooded back like snapshots, strung together into a thread of emotions she had buried deep.

She could understand why he’d left. Who didn’t want a better future? She had no choice—but he did.

But she suddenly remembered that back in high school, when he had learned about her family troubles, he had hugged her tightly, eyes red, repeating over and over:

“I’ll stay with you, Yan Sui. I’ll stay with you. Believe me.”

He had felt her pain, shared her tears.

After that, during her family’s hardest times, Yu Shuli hadn’t left. He thought of ways to make money with her, kept her company when she worked late shifts at restaurants, waiting outside until she finished.

On holidays, he came home with her for simple meals.

Even in sophomore year, when her mother attempted suicide due to depression and ended up in the ICU, saddling them with massive expenses, Yu Shuli stayed. He helped her borrow money everywhere.

Later, she learned from their mutual friends that Yu Shuli had borrowed from almost everyone around him. To repay the debts, he delivered food throughout college, only finishing repayment in their senior year.

That’s why Yan Sui had always been grateful. He had been there for her in her darkest times. Even if he later broke his promise, she knew he had tried.

She didn’t know how long she cried that day. But when she finally straightened up, she wore her old indifferent mask again. Packing her things, she headed out the door.

Her relationship with Yu Shuli, like graduation itself, had simply reached its endpoint. Then they went their separate ways.

After that, she never saw him again.

Years later, when she had finally saved enough money to repay what he’d borrowed for her mother’s hospital bills, she discovered that all his accounts had been deactivated. None of their mutual friends could reach him.

She only heard from an old clubmate that Yu Yunxi had gone abroad—and Yu Shuli had likely gone with her.

So Yan Sui packed the repayment money, plus interest, in cash and left the bag at the doorstep of Yu Shuli’s older brother’s home.

She watched from the shadows until they took the bag inside, then finally left, relieved.

From that moment, even the last thread between them was severed.

In that lifetime, until the car accident that ended her life, she never saw Yu Shuli again.

Yu Shuli, like their love, was left behind on their college campus.

After the opening ceremony, the sports meet officially began.

Yan Sui didn’t like sports. Forced by the class’s athletic rep, she signed up for the free-throw basketball event.

Her event was scheduled for the second day. Today, she had no competitions and no class group events. When Tan Shu found out, she dragged Yan Sui to watch her long jump.

For the sports meet, the school allowed students to use cameras and other devices.

Yan Sui crouched outside the sandpit, holding Tan Shu’s digital camera, trying to take photos of her jump.

The sun blazed high in the sky. Its glare made it impossible to see the camera screen clearly. She used one hand to shade it, but the display remained hazy.

Just as she was frowning at her blurry screen, someone suddenly stood behind her. Their shadow fell over her, covering her crouched figure.

In the shade, the camera screen became perfectly clear.

Yan Sui’s heart lifted. Just as she was about to snap a few shots of Tan Shu, a voice suddenly fell from above her—

“This way… is it clearer?”