After Breaking the Ice-Beauty's Heart - Chapter 37
Chapter 37: No.
No.
Hardship seemed to have no intention of letting Zhou Nianzhi go.
The moment she tasted a little bit of sweetness, fate immediately wanted her to taste all the bitterness.
Standing at the entrance of the intensive care unit, she was in so much pain she couldn’t breathe.
Not just her heart, but all of her organs ached. It was almost the pain of having her skin flayed and her tendons pulled out.
She hated herself for being so clumsy, for not seeing Sheng Ning’s painful and sleepless nights, and for not hearing Sheng Ning’s coughs that she tried so hard to suppress.
She blamed herself, thinking she was a selfish person.
Why didn’t I guess that Sheng Ning came home because she didn’t want me to suffer anymore? Why didn’t I guess that Sheng Ning insisted I get the letter behind the wedding photo?
Zhou Nianzhi was trembling all over, unable to control the heartache and sorrow. Fear drained away her happiness, and she once again fell from the light into the abyss.
Sinking into the deep sea, her eyelids grew heavier and heavier in the long wait.
She wanted so, so badly to just fall asleep.
No, I can’t collapse yet.
I still need to raise money for Mom’s surgery.
Zhou Nianzhi made many phone calls all night. She borrowed back the money she had just transferred to her uncle. To be honest, her uncle was also helpless. They didn’t have much money left after paying for their youngest daughter’s tuition.
She also called Lin An and only borrowed a little. She knew that Lin An wanted to quit her job to start her own business and needed money. Lin An, on the other end of the phone, anxiously asked what had happened and if she needed to borrow more from Yunyun.
Zhou Nianzhi refused. Yunyun had just gotten married and had a baby and needed money. How could she possibly lend so much?
In the end, Zhou Nianzhi still hadn’t raised enough for the next surgery.
Sheng Ning was hospitalized again.
But this time, Sheng Ning’s eyes were tightly shut, and she was lying in bed. Only the heart monitor could confirm that she was still alive.
Zhou Nianzhi sat by the hospital bed. She hadn’t eaten in a long time, and she was starting to lose feeling. It was only when a tear fell on her lips and she tasted the bitterness that she knew she was crying again.
On her way home to get Sheng Ning’s necessary documents and toiletries, Zhou Nianzhi received a call from her landlord.
“Hello, Xiao Zhou, when are you going to pay this month’s rent?”
Zhou Nianzhi stopped walking. The lights downstairs in the apartment complex flickered. She lowered her head, was silent for a few seconds, and said, “Sister, can I pay it a month later?”
“Eh? Did something happen?” the landlord asked with concern.
Zhou Nianzhi’s tears started to pour out again.
Compared to the landlord telling her to move out or scolding her for not paying rent on time, a word of concern from the landlord made it even harder for her to control her emotions. Her heart was completely broken.
“Oh, don’t cry. One month is one month. Just remember to pay it then,” the landlord’s tone became a little more friendly. “If you have any difficulties, you can tell me.”
Zhou Nianzhi was sobbing but still managed to reply with difficulty, “I’m fine, I’m fine. Thank you, Sister.”
“Okay,” the landlord heard that Zhou Nianzhi didn’t want to talk about it and didn’t ask further. “Then don’t cry anymore. Everything will be okay.”
When the call ended, Zhou Nianzhi felt a sense of relief. She squatted down and cried for a while. Afraid of being delayed, she scrambled to her feet, wanting to hurry home to get her things.
She stood up too quickly. Because she hadn’t rested well these past few days, her head was spinning, and she fell straight down.
Her skin was scraped.
Bl00d and tears flowed out together.
How can I even fall while walking?
This is so embarrassing.
She ignored the pain and tried to get up, propping herself up with her hands. The pain in her back came again, piercing deep into her bones.
Every step she took was painful for a long time, but Zhou Nianzhi couldn’t stop.
She walked all the way home in pain. She didn’t even have time to drink a sip of water. After grabbing her things, she wanted to leave as soon as possible.
While rummaging through her things, some papers with writing on them fell out.
Zhou Nianzhi recognized her mom’s handwriting at a glance.
So Mom asked for paper and a pen to write—
“Zhi Zhi, if things don’t go as planned, I want you to live well.”
Zhou Nianzhi cried until she could barely breathe. She hit herself several times to calm down. She didn’t have time for sadness. She just wanted to wipe away her tears and head to the hospital.
Just as she walked out of the apartment complex, she ran into Song Yuli.
Song Yuli, who had just gotten off work, was full of exhaustion. Her steps were slow, and the dark circles under her eyes were even more obvious in the light.
“Zhou Nianzhi?” Song Yuli stood frozen, her eyes looking down at Zhou Nianzhi’s arm and the torn hole in her pants, where faint wounds could be seen. “What happened to you?”
Zhou Nianzhi didn’t answer. She just wanted to leave this place as soon as possible so her uncooperative tears wouldn’t fall again.
“Zhi Zhi, what’s wrong with you?” Song Yuli’s voice sped up, and her face was full of anxiety.
All the stress that was piled up in her heart needed to be released. Zhou Nianzhi, hearing the worried questions, grew sharp thorns once again. Although she didn’t want to, she still said those hurtful words: “What does it have to do with you? Song Yuli, we’ve already broken up, and we’re not getting back together.”
Song Yuli lowered her eyes and let out a soft “oh.”
Zhou Nianzhi’s nose stung. She couldn’t stand to see Song Yuli looking so hurt. She quickly started to walk away, wanting to get away from Song Yuli as soon as possible.
But Song Yuli still followed her.
“Why are you following me?” Zhou Nianzhi didn’t stop. She quickly turned her head to say something to Song Yuli, then hurried on.
Song Yuli said honestly, “I’m worried about you.”
Zhou Nianzhi couldn’t take it anymore.
Her suppressed emotions completely erupted. She turned around and almost yelled in a hoarse voice, “I don’t want your concern! Who do you think you are?”
Song Yuli answered with a question, “Where are you going? Let me drive you.”
“Where I go is none of your business!” Zhou Nianzhi stood still, so upset that she was stomping her feet and crying. “Don’t waste my time!”
“That’s why I’m going to drive you. You stay here, and I’ll go get the car,” Song Yuli said, and then ran toward the apartment complex’s parking lot.
Zhou Nianzhi, holding her things, looked at Song Yuli’s back, sobbing uncontrollably. “Who wants you to pick me up…”
Song Yuli was really fast. Zhou Nianzhi had only walked a few steps when she saw Song Yuli’s car stop in front of her, waiting for her to get in.
“Zhou Nianzhi, get in.”
Zhou Nianzhi had wanted to firmly refuse, but then she thought that she was in a hurry, and this wasn’t the time to care about pride. So, she opened the car door and got in.
The direction was toward the hospital.
Zhou Nianzhi stopped crying, wiped away her tears with the back of her hand, and asked, “How did you know where I was going?”
Song Yuli said, “Because I know you very well.”
Out of the corner of her eye, Zhou Nianzhi saw that Song Yuli’s clothes were soaked with sweat, and a drop of sweat was sliding down her cheek from her forehead.
Zhou Nianzhi turned her head, not daring to look at Song Yuli anymore, and said, “You don’t know me.”
“You’re right,” Song Yuli answered quickly. “I don’t know you at all anymore.”
Zhou Nianzhi was stunned and didn’t say anything.
Song Yuli looked ahead, her mouth not stopping.
“You don’t want me to know you. You don’t tell me anything. You just want to handle everything by yourself.”
“Why can’t you trust me? Just for once. You make all the decisions yourself and never consider my feelings.”
Zhou Nianzhi lowered her head and listened silently.
“My dad, out of a sudden moment of conscience, thought that his bad career path these past two years was because he wronged me, so he wanted to compensate me and gave me some money. I originally wanted to save it for my grandma, but she was also worried about me not having my own money, so she wanted me to buy a house or a car. I agreed, because I wanted to buy a car so I could go to every city to find you. I miss you so much, Zhou Nianzhi. I really miss you.”
This was the first time Zhou Nianzhi had heard Song Yuli say so much in one breath, and she was a little shocked.
But Song Yuli had no intention of stopping. She wanted to tell Zhou Nianzhi everything on her mind.
“During the time I couldn’t contact you, my grandma’s illness also got worse. I was in so much pain. I was constantly switching between hating you and loving you, but I knew in my heart that all the hate I had for you would only make this relationship even deeper.”
“I didn’t let you see my grandma because I was afraid you would be sad if you saw she wasn’t well. I really don’t want to see you cry. And I also wanted you to tell me the reason why you left without a word that year.”
“You asked me if I was getting revenge. Actually, most of the time, I just wanted to express my hurt. Zhou Nianzhi, your heart is too cruel.”
Zhou Nianzhi’s tears were pouring down again, and her voice was trembling. “I’m sorry…”
“Zhou Nianzhi, I’ve told you everything on my mind,” Song Yuli paused, took a breath, and then continued, “Can you please tell me now what’s going on with you?”
When they were near the hospital, Song Yuli parked the car in the designated area and looked at Zhou Nianzhi, who was still sobbing. “Please.”
Zhou Nianzhi’s hands trembled as she unbuckled her seatbelt and opened the car door. She was crying so hard that she could barely speak clearly, but she said, “If you have time… come with me…”
Song Yuli replied with an “okay” and also unbuckled her seatbelt to get out of the car.
Zhou Nianzhi walked in front, and Song Yuli followed behind.
“I’m sorry…” Zhou Nianzhi kept her head down, wiping away her tears and apologizing repeatedly.
Song Yuli helped Zhou Nianzhi carry her things and said, “Zhi Zhi, I don’t want you to apologize. I’m just a little sad.”
“I’m the one who made you sad…” Zhou Nianzhi sobbed.
“I used to think so too,” Song Yuli looked up at the hospital. “But I don’t think so anymore.”
At the hospital, seeing Sheng Ning lying in the hospital bed, Zhou Nianzhi couldn’t stop her tears. After putting down her things, she could only hide outside and cry.
Song Yuli didn’t leave. She stayed by Zhou Nianzhi’s side the whole time, gently patting her back and listening to her pain.
“I didn’t know Mom’s illness was so serious…” Zhou Nianzhi blamed herself. “I didn’t even notice before…”
Song Yuli continued to pat Zhou Nianzhi’s back gently, wanting to offer some comfort.
“I can’t raise enough money… I’ve asked a lot of people for help… but it’s still not enough…” Zhou Nianzhi no longer wanted to hide anything. She desperately needed an outlet to be able to breathe.
Song Yuli’s hand paused. She asked, “Did you ask your relatives for help?”
Zhou Nianzhi nodded.
Song Yuli continued to ask, “Did you ask your friends for help? Lin An and them.”
Zhou Nianzhi replied with a “mhm.”
Song Yuli put her hand back down and continued to gently pat Zhou Nianzhi’s back.
In the quiet hospital, Zhou Nianzhi still heard Song Yuli’s almost self-deprecating laugh. She said softly, “Why didn’t you ask me?”
Zhou Nianzhi bit her lower lip and said, “I didn’t want to bother you.”
Song Yuli’s tone was normal, but it still carried a hint of sadness. “You just didn’t want to bother me.”
Zhou Nianzhi kept her head down and didn’t say anything.
“I don’t mean anything by it. I’m just wondering, you went to your relatives, and you went to your friends, so why couldn’t you come to me?” Song Yuli said. “Is it because I’m not good enough for you to trust?”
Zhou Nianzhi muffled a sound and called out, “Song Yuli…”
“But I’m this terrible person who only loves you,” Song Yuli let out a soft sigh, and her expression returned to normal. “So, whether you ask or not, I will do my best to help you.”
Zhou Nianzhi looked up at Song Yuli.
“Zhi Zhi, choose me just this one time, okay?”