Before My Memories With You Melt Away in Tears - Episode 1
In the bustling classroom of Class 1-3, Ayaka Okamachi sat at her desk, listening to her friends, Fujino Tsukizawa and Shuri Usami, talking. The topic of their conversation was something terrible their boyfriends had said recently. While it was about something cruel, it didn’t seem like that big of a deal to Ayaka.
It was just the usual—forgetting an anniversary, or misinterpreting a place they wanted to go. Really, it was all such minor things.
“Can you believe he said that!? Isn’t that terrible!?”
Fujino puffed out her cheeks and said, while Shuri dramatically nodded in agreement.
“That’s awful! Right, Ayaka, you think that’s terrible too, don’t you?”
“Yeah, that’s terrible! He didn’t have to say that!”
Ayaka’s and Shuri’s support seemed to calm Fujino down quite a bit. She still spoke in an upset tone but smiled and grabbed a piece of chocolate from her desk.
“Ugh, talking to you two really helped me feel better. Thanks a lot.”
“No problem at all! We’re always here to listen,” Shuri said, “Right, Ayaka?”
“Yeah, anytime! You can always talk to us,” Ayaka smiled.
Seeing Ayaka smile, Fujino hugged her from the desk ahead and said, “I just love you!”
Ayaka chuckled at her enthusiasm.
“Thanks, you’re always so cheerful!”
“If you ever need to talk, make sure to tell us too!” Shuri added. “I always get worried. I feel like you might be getting involved with weird people we don’t know.”
Fujino nodded firmly in agreement.
“Yeah, you seem responsible, but I can totally see you tripping when no one’s around.”
“Or you might get approached by strangers and get kidnapped or something!”
They both kept throwing out things they were worried about. At first, it seemed like genuine concern, but as they went on, their tone became teasing and playful, and Ayaka couldn’t help but notice.
“You’re so spacey, you’d probably never even notice if a manhole cover was open!”
“I can totally imagine you stepping on a dog’s tail and getting chased!”
“Eh! That’s not that bad!”
Despite the fact that none of this was really funny to Ayaka, she still ended up laughing.
“It’s nice that you can laugh things off like that, Ayaka!”
“Yeah! Some people get angry when you joke like that, but those kinds of people just suck, right?”
Ayaka flashed another fake smile at the two, though inwardly, she thought that the ones who got angry were probably in a better position than she was. They at least weren’t hiding their true feelings behind a forced smile like she was.
She couldn’t remember exactly when it started, but smiling reflexively had become a habit. Whenever something good happened, or something bad, when she was frustrated or sad, she would still end up smiling.
Because of this habit, there had been countless times people mistook her for not being angry or upset. She wished she could fix it, but once something became a habit, it wasn’t easy to change.
“Wait, wait!”
Suddenly, Shuri’s words seemed to catch Fujino’s attention, and she raised both hands in front of her, signaling to stop.
“Wait, are you talking about me when you said those people get angry?” Fujino asked, her voice taking on a serious tone. “You know, like the other day…”
Fujino seemed to recall something, while Shuri reflexively looked at Ayaka, her face showing concern. It seemed that she hadn’t meant to bring up Fujino’s case, but now it was clear that Fujino had noticed.
An awkward atmosphere started to settle between them. Ayaka hated this kind of atmosphere. It made her feel uneasy and made her heartbeat race.
She wanted to escape the situation immediately, but she knew she couldn’t just run away from it.
“Well, well,” Ayaka smiled awkwardly, trying to lighten the mood. She turned her face between Fujino and Shuri.
“I wasn’t talking about you, Fujino! Right, Shuri?”
“Y-yeah, exactly!”
“Hmm? Is that so?”
Despite her doubts, Fujino continued to look at Ayaka and Shuri, still suspicious. Ayaka forced a smile.
“Everything’s fine! Don’t worry about it.”
“Well… I guess we’ll just leave it at that,” Fujino said, though she still seemed a little dissatisfied.
Ayaka felt a sense of relief when she saw Fujino accept it, even though there was still some unease in the air.
She hated conflicts between people, but she hated even more that she couldn’t stop herself from smiling when it wasn’t even necessary.
She hated that she couldn’t change the fact that she kept doing it. She hated herself for it.
After this inner turmoil, Ayaka found herself walking home alone after school. Fujino headed to the brass band club, and Shuri went off to the girls’ soccer team, while Ayaka packed her things and left the classroom.
Clubs were not mandatory, but almost everyone belonged to one. Ayaka had planned to join one too, but after catching a cold early in the school year and missing a week of school, the sign-up period had already ended by the time she returned.
While everyone else had already finished club visits and had entered trial periods, Ayaka didn’t feel comfortable asking to join at this point. So, she ended up in the “Home Club” instead.
But honestly, not having to be around others and constantly forcing a smile all the time made the home club a bit of a blessing.
As she changed into her shoes at the entrance and stepped outside, the weather was perfect. It wasn’t too hot or cold, just a nice in-between time before the rainy season hit after Golden Week.
She wondered what to do when she got home. Maybe she’d stop by the bookstore—it had been a while. But just as Ayaka was thinking about that, a voice came from behind her.
“Excuse me.”
“…?”
“Excuse me, is this Ayaka Okamachi?”
Ayaka turned around to find a boy standing there, wearing a kind smile.