Bone-Attached Disaster - Chapter 36:

Chapter 36: Indulgence

The location of that slip of paper was enough to indicate the owner’s cherish for it. This was too much to process. In Lu Jie’s eyes, the stack of test papers he had helped Fu Jia’an write his name on were likely trash and scrap paper. He never imagined they were actually taken home, perhaps carefully examined page by page, and finally cut out and meticulously collected.

Fu Jia’an would do something like that? Is he serious? If he pulled the entire slip out, would he find that he had actually gotten it wrong?

Even without knowing the full story, he was already regretting things. Since childhood, Lu Jie had always been so graceful. If someone confessed to him, he would definitely listen seriously—that was his politeness and principle. Why didn’t that apply to Fu Jia’an? Why did he automatically assume the other’s feelings were false?

If Fu Jia’an saying he liked him was true…

If it was true, then Lu Jie had been a complete jerk.

Some things could not be guessed; he could only ask Fu Jia’an directly what he was thinking. Fu Jia’an had said that the truth was always open to Lu Jie, and he would continue to tell him if he wanted to hear it.

Besides, hadn’t Lu Jie been waiting for a chance to talk properly with Fu Jia’an for all these years? He blamed Fu Jia’an for not being sincere, for not explaining anything after they reconnected, but instead lingering around him evasively. Yet, how much braver was Lu Jie than him?

Someone passed behind him—Fu Jia’an was returning.

Lu Jie looked up and asked him, “Is it still raining outside?”

“It is, but very lightly.”

“Let’s go,” Lu Jie stood up, holding two bottles of beer. “Come with me to the rooftop to get some air.”

If this were twelve years ago, anyone present would think Lu Jie was challenging Fu Jia’an to a fight. But today, the two even walked the red carpet together, and everyone guessed their private relationship had improved, so no one intervened and continued chatting amongst themselves.

Only Jiang Yan deliberately called out, “Jia’an, take care of Lu Jie; he’s a lightweight when it comes to drinking!”

Lu Jie: “You shut up.”

Away from the banquet hall, the surroundings instantly became quiet. Lu Jie belatedly felt a little awkward; he didn’t know how to start the conversation. Fu Jia’an also didn’t say anything inappropriate, as he usually would, to lighten the mood. Lu Jie had to pretend to be calm. After entering the elevator, he took out his phone, casually opened a few apps, refreshed, and then closed them.

In the WeChat interface, messages were constantly popping up in the class group, which Lu Jie had silenced. This group was created after graduation, and Fu Jia’an was not in it. However, Lu Jie saw a fleeting message that seemed to mention Fu Jia’an.

Lu Jie opened the group chat for the first time in ages. It turned out everyone was discussing whether Fu Jia’an had a partner, and the topic had been ongoing since Fu Jia’an entered the room an hour ago.

Gao Yang: [Does anyone know if Fu Jia’an has a girlfriend?]

Ye Mingyan: [Haven’t heard. @Peng Yuan]

Peng Yuan: [He’s single]

Hu Zhiyou: [@Gao Yang What, interested?]

Gao Yang: [Thinking of introducing him to my sister… she thought everyone I introduced before wasn’t handsome enough.]

Gao Yang: [If it works, it’ll boost our family IQ.]

Classmate A: [Then me too…]

Classmate B: [Then me too…]

Classmate C: [Then me too…]

What was all this about? Lu Jie pressed the lock screen button, not wanting to read further.

When they reached the rooftop and exited the elevator, the rain had almost stopped, leaving only a trace of post-rain humidity in the air. The air was clean, and the thick clouds were dissipating. The colors of the sunset overflowed from them, with edges of orange-red turning into glowing, molten gold.

People had already noticed the rain had stopped. The area was quite lively, with people lying in lounge chairs watching the sunset, others mixing drinks at the bar, and staff setting up string lights for an evening performance. A few children were running around blowing bubbles.

The area by the railing was more secluded. Lu Jie walked there. Fu Jia’an followed, facing the sunset. In that moment, Lu Jie suddenly agreed with Jiang Yan: Fu Jia’an was indeed very good-looking.

“I have something to say to you.”

“Mhm.”

Lu Jie said, “I’m sorry for hitting you without asking for the full story back then. Also, I should have asked you directly about your reason for choosing J University’s medical school instead of guessing. And your silence after leaving was also because… you resented me, right?”

Fu Jia’an smiled. “I’d never been in a fight before. I got that experience from you, which was quite new. Haha.”

“I’m not joking with you.”

“I’m not either.” Fu Jia’an curbed his smile slightly. He lowered his gaze to his hand gripping the beer bottle, giving his eyes a point of focus. “Lu Jie, you were the first person to treat me like a normal person. Not an orphan, not a child, not a patient, not a monster called a ‘genius.’ What’s the big deal about two normal boys fighting? You say I resented you, but you didn’t do anything wrong. From your perspective, weren’t you wronged? You didn’t know anything, were kept in the dark from start to finish, and only heard the truth later from others. I was the one who concealed and avoided first. It’s only natural that you lost your temper. I can’t be in the right just because my life was miserable, no matter what happened, can I?”

Lu Jie disagreed. “I was wronged, but that doesn’t mean the way I handled things back then was right. At least now, I wouldn’t be so impulsive.”

Fu Jia’an deliberately raised his hand and clinked his bottle against Lu Jie’s. “You didn’t call me up here just for mutual confession and repentance, did you?”

Lu Jie took a deep breath, seemingly preparing himself. He said solemnly, “About you saying you liked me, this time I will listen carefully.”

Fu Jia’an looked slightly surprised. “Really?”

“…Let me be clear. I want to take your feelings seriously, but that doesn’t mean I’ll accept you after hearing what you have to say.”

“I know.” Fu Jia’an blinked. His eyelashes were impossibly long, and each one was now touched with gold.

He raised the bottle, took a sip of beer, and then said, “I really do like you.”

Fu Jia’an said this with a smile, but Lu Jie understood immediately, without needing any explanation, that he was sincere this time. It was an open clam shell, exposing the softest, most vulnerable parts, a secret held for so long that it had been polished into a round, beautiful pearl.

The wind messed up Fu Jia’an’s hair. He looked at Lu Jie, the small mole on his nose bridge seeming tailor-made for Lu Jie. Lu Jie didn’t know why he felt overwhelmed every time he looked at that mole. Sometimes, he even forgot Fu Jia’an’s gender; he just couldn’t look enough.

He turned his gaze away, yet he could still feel Fu Jia’an’s eyes, not scorching, but heavy with meaning.

Lu Jie took a sip of beer and asked, “Since when?”

Fu Jia’an said, “I previously thought I started liking you around the time of the physics competition.”

“You thought?”

“Mhm,” Fu Jia’an smiled. “Because we were always together during that time.”

“Since it was ‘thought,’ then…”

“Later, I realized I fell for you on the very first day I met you.”

Lu Jie couldn’t help but turn his head, meeting the reflection of the sunset in Fu Jia’an’s eyes, which captured the vast colors of the world. The clouds were ever-changing, seemingly shifting drastically in just a few blinks, yet Lu Jie’s reflection remained at the center, unchanged.

“How, how could that be?” Lu Jie hadn’t expected it to be so early. “But we were rivals then. The whole world knew we were at odds.”

“That’s my fault. Sorry, I couldn’t think of a better way to get your attention back then. I also didn’t know how to treat someone I liked.”

Fu Jia’an continued, “You know, in the past twenty-eight years of my life, I’ve spent more time in hospitals than at home or school. I’ve been a patient, and now I’m a doctor. I know best that when people are entangled by the cycle of birth, aging, sickness, and death, all they can do is wait—wait for reports, wait for results, resigning themselves to fate. So, in other matters, one must take the initiative.”

He leaned in closer, looking at Lu Jie. “Lu Jie, starting now, I’m going to pursue you. I have a lot of patience, so you can take your time to consider. Just don’t run away…” Then he propped his chin on his elbow, smiling somewhat flirtatiously. “Because no matter where you run, I will bring you back.”

Lu Jie was initially touched, but the latter half of the sentence made him feel rebellious again. He straightened his posture. The height advantage he had over Fu Jia’an gave him more confidence. “That’s rich. Where does your confidence come from? If you pursue me, does that mean I’ll agree?”

Fu Jia’an only smiled, seemingly unbothered by Lu Jie’s bristling reaction. The sun dipped below the horizon, leaving a lingering, poignant afterglow. Transparent bubbles floated up from behind them, flying into the towering buildings lit by neon lights.

Fu Jia’an thought that both then and now, Lu Jie was always the one who took the initiative. He was the one who held an umbrella for him first, and he was the one who first brought up their shared scar.

They had cleared up the misunderstanding from back then, but the twelve years of blank separation were too complex and heavy. Fu Jia’an hadn’t figured out how to explain it, but fortunately, Lu Jie hadn’t pressed for details either. From the start, Lu Jie only wanted to clearly express his apology, without forcing anything on Fu Jia’an. He was always like this: forthright and kind.

It made Fu Jia’an’s heart skip a beat for the countless time.

Fu Jia’an sidled closer, his smile full of desire. “Can I kiss you then?”

“No!”

Lu Jie thought, Why is this guy like this? He says he likes him, yet he looks like an experienced player, his face betraying no emotion. Meanwhile, Lu Jie himself felt completely flustered after hearing the confession.

Fu Jia’an truly liked him.

This was a paradigm shift, turning his world upside down.

Lu Jie had never considered this possibility before, and he certainly couldn’t process it in this short half-hour. He was nothing but shocked. He didn’t even understand his own feelings. Normally, when someone confessed to him, if he didn’t feel anything for them, he would immediately and decisively turn them down face-to-face.

But for some reason, facing a man, Lu Jie found himself unable to say the word “no.”