Cherishing You As Always - Chapter 2

I wandered about the street without caring where I went for a long time; it wasn’t until twilight that I decided to head home.

I’d played hooky from my studies today and had a blast. As long as Father wasn’t around, I felt like a bird freed from its cage — completely free!

Humming a little tune, I strolled back into the compound. I muttered, “Mother, your daughter’s home…,” as I pushed open the big gate.

But when I entered the hall, I saw my father sitting expressionless, watching me. The teacher was seated on the lower side of the hall, lifting an eyebrow and showing a faint, hard-to-notice smile.

Did I leave without checking the almanac today? Hmm — I never make a habit of reading it.

I’d thought today was lucky, but it turned out to be disastrous. Wasn’t Father supposed to be away on a long trip? How did he get back so soon?

I stuck out my tongue and walked into the hall, then, as usual, knelt down. Father sneered, “Not bad — you still have some eyes to see with. Song Lanlou, you’ve got a bold streak. I’m gone a few days and you turn the world upside down, don’t you?”

He slammed the table with a “clang.” I glanced at the teacher; he was smiling the all-too-proper gentleman smile. I was naturally furious. Ignoring my father’s shouting, I jumped up and yelled at the teacher, “You pompous teacher — stop putting on that gentleman act! You’re nothing but a petty snitch!”

The teacher was startled and turned pale. I was just about to enjoy my victory when a cold gust brushed past me from behind — Father had already stepped up beside me. I let out a startled cry, “Father…!”

Father grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me aside, then turned to the teacher with a smile and said, “Teacher, the girl was only fooling around — please don’t take it seriously.”

The teacher composed himself into the gentlemanly manner again. He stood, flicked his sleeve, and his old face flushed red. “Miss Song is so mischievous,” he said. “I’m afraid our little academy can’t stand such provocations. If Master Song has no objection, I must ask Miss Song not to come to the academy anymore.”

That was obviously a way of telling me I couldn’t study there anymore. But if I couldn’t study, I’d have to stay home helping Father and wait for suitors to come. Father and Mother would pick whichever wealthy or influential family and marry me off. That would be worse than studying. No way.

I hurriedly tried to placate the teacher, forgetting my neck was still in Father’s hand. “Teacher! Please don’t be angry! Adults, do not keep a grudge against small people! I won’t dare again, I really won’t! I swear I won’t do it again!”

The teacher stroked his already-white whiskers as if satisfied by my contrition, but he couldn’t bring himself to lose face, so he still left in a huff.

Once the teacher had gone, Father immediately tossed me into a chair and scowled. “Lanlou, what are you thinking? When I tell you to study, you go and mess with the teachers. You’ve been at this academy only two months, and that teacher has already reported you fifteen times! Will you only be quiet if I send you up the mountain to study?”

Studying wasn’t what I really wanted, but being married off was even less appealing. I’d rather stay at the academy forever than be married off.

I straightened my posture at once and sat properly to take my father’s scolding.

“These past two years you’ve been to five different academies, and you usually only stay one or two months each time. Every time I go on a trip, you make an uproar and set the place topsy-turvy.”

I nodded and snorted twice, continuing to listen to him bellow around the hall. “You drive every teacher half mad. Did you see the teacher just now? He was terrified, like a mouse. I truly don’t understand how you study. If you don’t want to learn, then come home and help me. Starting tomorrow, I’ll have your mother find you a husband. I’ll have you married off early. You can go ruin someone else’s household!”

When I heard he was going to marry me off, I jumped up, grabbed his sleeve, and forced a few tears out, begging for mercy. “Father — your daughter knows she was wrong! Then send me to the mountain academy to study! This time I’ll be good and obey — I absolutely won’t cause trouble again! I’m still too young to marry!”

Father shook off my hand and paced, one hand behind his back and one finger pointing at me, exasperated: “You always say the same things. Do you think I’m old and stupid? Do you think you can trick me so easily?”

I hurriedly grabbed his sleeve again and put on a spoiled-young-lady act, cooing, “All right, Father, please forgive me this once! At worst I’ll write you a guarantee? If I misbehave again you can send me up the mountain then?”

Father flicked his long sleeve again and, fingers trembling, rubbed his graying beard. His brows were deeply furrowed as if carved by a blade. He glanced at me and said, “Song Lanlou, if I didn’t have to pin my hopes on you, I would’ve married you off already! Look at your brother — half-dead and lying in bed, needing care. You’re the lady of this house; can’t you behave so I don’t have to worry so much? I sent you to school so you’d gain knowledge. I don’t expect you to be a savant, but at least you can pick up the abacus and keep our accounts. After I’m gone, your mother and brother will rely on you. Look at you now — frivolous and careless. If you were born a son, you’d be a spendthrift. I tell you, your excuses won’t work this time!”

He banged the table, sat down heavily, and I already sensed the decision he had made. Before I could react, he told me, “There’s an academy three hundred li from here on Qifeng Mountain. I know the master there. I’ll write him a letter tonight; you should pack tomorrow and go study on the mountain. You’ve caused too much trouble here. You can’t succeed by doing whatever you please — better to lock you up on a mountain and let others teach you!”

He struck the table again and trembled with anger. Hearing he was going to send me away — I’d never been far from home before — panic seized me. I knelt at once and begged, “Father, can’t you accept my repentance? Please don’t send me to that academy. I’ve never been so far from home in my life!”

Father cut me off immediately. “Even better — get some experience out there so you won’t remain a frog at the bottom of the well.”

I felt as if I might burst into tears. Father was determined. I clung to his leg. “Father! No! I’ll change, I promise! I don’t know if I can stand the damp climate on the mountain. Please don’t be angry — I promise I won’t misbehave again!”

Father lowered his head, still angry. I quickly subdued myself and didn’t speak further.

“You repent now? Too late. If you had been this earnest before, I might have spared you. But look around — which academy nearby hasn’t been thrown into chaos by you? If it weren’t for me shielding you, this child would have been humbled long ago. I can’t manage you any longer. I’ll let someone else handle you. That master on the mountain is famously strict. Once you go, you’re not to return for two years. You may choose whatever silver and servants you need. If you make real progress, I’ll be pleased, and this household will be entirely yours. But if any teacher sends another complaint, mark my words — watch out for your skin!”