Divorce Is An Absolute Must! - Chapter 32

Chapter 32: Confession

◎I really want to start over.◎

“Oh, I forgot,” Hu Xu said, slapping her forehead. “Has your memory still not recovered?”

The vegetarian meatball in Zhu Qing’s mouth fell onto the table with a “plop.” How did Hu Xu know that she had amnesia?!

Zhu Qing opened her mouth, but before she could say anything, Liu Yini interjected with a scolding tone, “The brain isn’t something that recovers so quickly.”

“Didn’t you say it wasn’t serious?”

“It’s still the brain.”

“She’s so young, what could be wrong with her brain?”

Zhu Qing: …My brain is fine, thank you very much.

Amnesia, such a rare and novel thing in life, instantly drew everyone’s attention. As far as Zhu Qing could tell, all the cameras, except for the few fixed ones, were now pointed at her.

Zhu Qing: …

Xu Yuzhi said with fascination, “You have amnesia?”

Zhu Qing was about to explain, but Li Lan took over with a light laugh. “Yes, she fell down the stairs not long ago and might have hit something. The doctor said she has short-term memory loss.”

“Short-term?” Sun Qi was very curious. He was separated from Zhu Qing by Xu Yuzhi, so to get a better look, he leaned in directly towards Zhu Qing, his eyes burning with intensity. “From when to when? Do you know that you’ve lost your memory? What does it feel like to have amnesia?”

Li Lan said softly, “A little over a year, I think. She doesn’t feel much. She just forgot everything about us. People with short-term memory loss are not much different from normal people because it doesn’t involve their identity, but if too many memories are lost, it can cause mental health problems.”

Sun Qi nodded knowingly. He was a drama fanatic, and a situation like Zhu Qing’s was great material for acting—a completely new character archetype he had never seen before.

“So you and Teacher Li…” Yu Ling, who had been eating quietly, suddenly spoke. Her beautiful eyes curved slightly as she said softly, “Do you have to start over?”

Zhu Qing turned her head, but just as she was about to speak, Li Lan interrupted her again.

“Not entirely,” Li Lan said, a helpless but doting expression on her face. She sighed. “At first, she thought we were playing a prank on her and had fabricated a wife for her. She even looked for cameras to see if we were filming a reality show.”

“Later, when the evidence was undeniable, and she saw that she still lived in the same place as before her marriage, she had to stay with me to get home. Things have just been like this ever since.”

Yu Ling said softly, “That’s quite romantic. But the production crew might have some quizzes that test your compatibility later. Teacher Li should prepare in advance, otherwise, if Teacher Zhu doesn’t remember things about you, you might lose the game.”

Li Lan nodded. “Thank you for the reminder, but I feel it’s better to just let things happen naturally. Besides, we have a long life ahead of us. Marriage is a lifelong commitment, so a year’s worth of memories isn’t a big deal.”

Zhu Qing quietly picked up her meatball, put another one in her mouth, and remained silent. Anyway, now that Li Lan was suddenly so talkative, she was happy to sit back and relax.

Xu Yuzhi laughed. “Haha, so you’re just starting a new relationship? Wow, I’m so jealous.”

Sun Qi said coolly, “You’re jealous again.”

Xu Yuzhi said quietly, “Yeah! How about you get amnesia and forget me?”

Sun Qi pulled his head back. “No way. I’m afraid you’d run away.”

Xu Yuzhi: “What a coward.”

Zhu Qing finally found common ground with someone. She was currently in the middle of a big, romantic chase. She nodded vigorously at Xu Yuzhi. “It feels great to start over!”

Li Lan pressed her hand to her forehead, speechless. “Only she gets to start over. I’m the one who never lost my memory, and it’s been… very tiring to cooperate with her.”

Hu Xu burst out with a loud, hearty laugh.

“What’s there to chase? You young people like to have fun with romance. In our day, once you were married, you were a couple for life. What’s amnesia? Even if you had an accident and became paralyzed or lost a limb, you would never leave each other…”

Liu Yini said in a low voice, “Hu Xu, what are you talking about? Don’t jinx it!”

Hu Xu immediately quieted down. She smacked her lips. “That’s… that’s just what I meant.”

Liu Yini’s face had darkened. “Shut up and eat your food.”

Hu Xu went as silent as a mute.

Zhu Qing blushed a little from all their teasing. She said, “Let’s eat, let’s eat. The food’s getting cold.”

Afterward, the others chatted about their recent lives. Zhu Qing noticed that Sun Qi and Xu Yuzhi were very neutral. They joined every conversation and were very emotionally intelligent in their words and actions. In Qi Yao and Yu Ling’s group, the former just focused on eating, and the latter would occasionally agree with a few words. But since she was so pretty, everyone couldn’t help but compliment her looks.

Hu Xu and Liu Yini were more genuine. With their experience and reputation, they were easy to get along with.

Zhu Qing quietly noted down the interactions of everyone and organized them in her mind.

Later that night, when she was going over the day with Li Lan, she was able to confirm most of her observations.

“I have a question,” Zhu Qing said, sitting cross-legged on the bed, making eye contact with Li Lan, who was fanning herself on a wooden couch. She smiled slyly. “And I need Teacher Li to answer it.”

Li Lan was too tired to be on guard anymore. “Go ahead.”

Zhu Qing squinted at her. “Teacher Hu deliberately brought up my amnesia in front of everyone, didn’t she?”

Li Lan chuckled. “Didn’t you already figure that out?”

“Teacher Hu is so respected. Something like amnesia is my personal business. She doesn’t have a grudge against me. No normal person would be so blunt about revealing my private matters. And she must have been told by someone that I had amnesia. So, who was it?”

As she spoke, Zhu Qing moved closer to Li Lan. She was close enough that if she stretched her leg, she could touch Li Lan’s knee.

Li Lan’s expression remained calm. “Maybe Qian Can Can went to some random party and told her.”

“Don’t slander her,” Zhu Qing said quickly. “She really looks up to you.”

“Then who do you think it was?” Li Lan couldn’t suppress the smile on her lips anymore.

At this moment, Zhu Qing was like a little fox who got what she wanted and was now showing off. She said smugly, “It was definitely you! I’ve been worried about this. You heard Yu Ling. We’ll be playing games later, and it would be horrible if I didn’t know anything. But if it’s revealed in advance that I have amnesia, and by the most senior person here, Teacher Hu, it gives a reason for all my reactions later. There’s no better solution than that.”

Li Lan nodded seriously. “That’s a good analysis. I give you a thumbs up.”

“The day before we left, I went to see someone. It was Hu Xu. When I was in my early twenties, I worked in her theater company for a while. Unfortunately, theater was declining, and she couldn’t continue it alone, so she had to sell it. After that, I went abroad, and we lost touch. When I found out she was also coming on the show, I asked her to bring up your amnesia on her own to explain things clearly and prevent the production crew from creating any drama and causing misunderstandings with the audience.”

Zhu Qing couldn’t help but clap. “You’re great, Teacher Li. You planned everything flawlessly and made me worry for nothing.”

“I told you not to worry. You were just stressing yourself out for no reason.” Li Lan sat up, grabbed Zhu Qing’s knee, and lifted her leg back into the mosquito net. “Go get some rest. We have a long day tomorrow.”

Zhu Qing said, “Okay,” feeling both excited and nervous. “We’ll get to watch the first episode tomorrow.”

The first episode was released at 6 AM the next day. The show’s fans, who were used to the schedule, affectionately called it “Early Bird Dating Show.”

“The early worm gets eaten by the bird. Let’s see who the worm is this time.”

“I don’t know who the worm is, but Qi Yao is definitely the bird.”

Because the show promoted a natural lifestyle and the guests had to be self-sufficient every season, fans would call the person who was the worst at providing for themselves the “worm,” while the person who was well-fed and well-rested was the “bird.”

The first episode was divided into three parts. The first part was about choosing rooms and cleaning them. The show edited in Qi Yao’s “love at first sight” for the e-sports room. His eyes were full of surprise, excitement, eagerness, and desire. He kept muttering about it the whole way, but the suspense was turned on its head when he was shown choosing the room downstairs, leaving the better room for the guests who had yet to arrive. The room selection part only showed the footage of Zhu Qing and Li Lan cleaning their room. At first, it was quite boring, and many viewers skipped it. But the scene suddenly shifted to Zhu Qing being covered in mosquito bites, and she said with a pained expression, “I’m never looking at the moon again.” This instantly drew the audience back in. The viewers saw the two of them going out to look at the moon in a leisurely and elegant manner, only to immediately become disheveled and covered in dirt. The comedic effect was priceless.

“First, Li Lan takes a cow carriage, and now she takes her wife out to feed the mosquitoes. Who understands this kind of cute contrast?!]”

“No one is speaking up for Zhu Qing? As someone who gets bitten by mosquitoes easily, I can relate so much!”

The second part was about cooking. This part was dominated by Zhu Qing, of course. It also coincidentally explained why Qi Yao was covered in mud: he thought that lettuce could grow in neat, square patches in the wild. Even after Yu Ling tried hard to tell him that lettuce wasn’t a wild vegetable and rarely grew in neat clumps, he insisted that it was wild because there was a patch like that in his childhood neighborhood, and he had never seen anyone plant it. Yu Ling wanted to tell him that it was probably not lettuce but some kind of ornamental grass, but Qi Yao was so stubborn that he quickly attracted the attention of a local dog named Da Huang, who guarded the yard. Da Huang was intelligent and would only bark but not bite. Yu Ling stopped picking the vegetables when she heard the dog barking, but Qi Yao continued to pick without lifting his head. That’s why Da Huang only chased him and made him eat mud.

“Hahahaha, how is the crazy Qi Yao so stupid and cute?!”

“Yao Yao, you’re talking about ornamental kale, right? That stuff doesn’t taste good.”

“Who is Yu Ling? When did the Chinese entertainment industry get such high-quality goods?!”

“Someone’s being disrespectful. Don’t call people ‘goods.’ Just call a beautiful woman a beautiful woman.”

“I think Zhu Qing is pretty too. She can go to the hall and go to the kitchen. She can even pick mushrooms.”

“Give it a rest. Zhu Qing is a Plain Jane. Don’t try to compare her to Yu Ling. Are their facial features even on the same level?”

“You’re calling Zhu Qing a Plain Jane? I think you’re crazy.”

“Stop arguing, everyone. They’re both beautiful in their own way. They’re not rivals. Why are you guys trying to tear them down?”

The third part was about the arrival of the other two couples. The content, from their welcome to the eight people gathering together, was the most extensive. At this point, the authority of the award-winning actor and actress became apparent. Their fan base was the most loyal, and the arguments in the comments finally quieted down. The atmosphere became peaceful as everyone listened to them chat.

When Zhu Qing’s memory loss was brought up, Zhu Qing, who was watching the show with Li Lan, felt her heart tighten. What would the audience say? Would they believe it or not? Would they be sarcastic? Would they say she was just there for the money since she had amnesia and was on a dating show?

“Is it real or fake? Is her amnesia that precise? She only forgot her wife?”

“It’s probably not fake. Li Lan posted their marriage certificate. Don’t be so harsh.”

“So what’s their situation now? We want to see couples being affectionate. What is this with Zhu Qing?”

“And they aren’t affectionate? Zhu Qing doesn’t even remember Li Lan, but she’s still willing to be on a show with her, cook for her, and clean the house for her. Don’t pretend you’re blind and can’t see that Zhu Qing is doing most of the work.”

“Stop arguing. It’s their business. Her amnesia happened recently, right? Maybe their relationship is being rebuilt.”

Zhu Qing didn’t receive much criticism. Instead, she was able to transition peacefully amid a lot of humorous banter. Although the production crew had covered up Qi Yao’s most outrageous comments and bad facial expressions, they didn’t deliberately cut out Zhu Qing’s moments of glory. After all, a person who works hard and is kind is always likable.

Li Lan quietly opened her social media. Her account had gained some new followers, and she could already see people posting about Zhu Qing. Zhu Qing watched the entire episode without blinking and let out a long sigh of relief.

“Luckily, I wasn’t attacked,” Zhu Qing said, touching her chest. She didn’t realize that her voice was soft from the shock, and the way she spoke to Li Lan was like she was pouting. “Now I can relax.”

Li Lan looked at her for a moment, and her voice suddenly became a little lower. “…Were you scared?”

Zhu Qing: “Scared of what?”

“During the time you lost your memory, you didn’t remember me, you didn’t remember Xiao Bao, and you didn’t remember us,” Li Lan said slowly. “Were you scared?”

Her tone was very calm, but there was a hint of cautious probing, as if she was deliberately covering something up. After watching the reality show, Li Lan suddenly realized, from an outsider’s perspective, that she had never asked Zhu Qing if she was scared.

Li Lan had never thought about this question before because Zhu Qing had shown a strong sense of independence from the beginning. For example, she actively canceled the divorce, actively returned home, actively cooked for her, actively took pictures of her, actively accepted the show, and actively provided all the help she could. She had never considered what the amnesiac Zhu Qing was thinking.

Zhu Qing ran her hand through her hair. It was still slightly wet from her shower. The tips were twisted into a small bunch, and a cool droplet of water fell from them. She held the ends of her hair for a moment, lost in thought, before she smiled. “You told Sun Qi that people with short-term amnesia wouldn’t have an identity crisis. But you might not believe this, I really didn’t understand all my choices from the past year… Of course, not including you.”

Li Lan stared at her blankly. She had never thought that Zhu Qing would have a moment of self-doubt.

“I didn’t know why I became a kindergarten teacher, and I didn’t know why I, a person who doesn’t like children, was so close to Xiao Bao. I also didn’t know why our marriage, which was completely fine from my point of view, had gotten to the point of divorce. I still don’t completely understand it, but I can accept it now,” Zhu Qing said, lowering her head. Her voice was soft, but very gentle. “However, I have never doubted why I like you.”

She was a little shy about saying this. Maybe because she had always been bad at expressing herself as a child, and as an adult, she was more reserved. The most she had ever done to Li Lan was to hug her when Li Lan confessed about her life in the orphanage.

“You…” Li Lan felt as if her mouth was glued shut. She couldn’t say a word. She wanted to ask Zhu Qing why she felt this way, but she also wondered if she had misunderstood.

Zhu Qing said, a little embarrassed, “I didn’t scare you, did I? I should have told you this a long time ago. At first, I was afraid you would bring up divorce. But then I realized you seemed to have forgiven me and haven’t mentioned divorce again. That’s when I finally got the courage to say it.”

Li Lan was silent for a few seconds. She said with great difficulty, “You were like this from the beginning, too.”

Zhu Qing: “What?”

Li Lan said slowly, word by word, “Maybe I just fit your aesthetic. You were like this with me from the very beginning.”

Zhu Qing blinked. She quickly accepted this fact. After all, she was the same person, so it was normal for her behavior to be consistent.

“But… we still had a falling out in the end,” Li Lan said, rubbing the space between her eyebrows. Her tone was a little tired, and there was a confusion she couldn’t explain. “Sometimes I wonder if we moved too fast, and we didn’t have a chance to get to know each other and go through a period of adjustment, which led to a bad ending… I mean, maybe we can now not worry about it so much and let it develop naturally. Of course, you might regain your memory soon, and you won’t need to start over with me. And I’ve already found a doctor for you. As soon as the show ends, we’ll fly directly to Country M…”

A hand suddenly pressed down on Li Lan’s head. Li Lan’s rambling stopped abruptly.

This was the first time Zhu Qing had ever touched Li Lan’s head. It felt exactly as she had imagined: smooth and a little springy, soft and a little cool. It was very similar to how Li Lan felt as a person.

“It’s okay. I’m not saying this to put pressure on you,” Zhu Qing said seriously. “I’ve already adapted to life after the amnesia. I’ve accepted my current identity and the current you. No matter what happens between us in the future, let’s not make a rash decision today. Just as you said, let’s just let it happen naturally, okay?”

Li Lan’s throat felt unusually dry. She couldn’t say no. She knew… she knew how Zhu Qing had been towards her before the amnesia. What would it mean to accept Zhu Qing’s “fresh start” now? Even if she accepted it now, what would all this time together mean if Zhu Qing regained her memory and still chose to get a divorce? Maybe at that point, Zhu Qing’s gaze would become even colder.

But today, Zhu Qing had laid bare her heart, expressing her deepest feelings with the most genuine words. There was no way Li Lan could say no.

“Let me… think about it. I’ll give you my answer after the show ends, okay?”

Zhu Qing’s eyes curved into crescent moons. “I’ll wait for you.”

The atmosphere in the room was humid and intimate. The steam from Zhu Qing’s shower, mixed with the scent of her body wash, combined to create a unique scent that belonged only to Zhu Qing. It lingered around Li Lan’s nose like a soft, boneless hand, teasing her.

Li Lan took a deep breath. Just as she was about to get up, she heard a melodious tune echo in the quiet night. First, there was a guitar strum, and then a young girl’s soft humming.

[Her eyelashes are frosted; I no longer eat sweets] [In the divided moonlight, we share the same stumble] [Listen, crushed ice is sprouting in our throats] [I’ll brew a sigh into a rosy cloud] [We’re walking in unadjusted time differences] [The moonlight on our feet grows branches and takes root]

…

Zhu Qing looked towards the lit-up screen on the windowsill. It was Li Lan’s phone, and there was an incoming call. The tune was the ringtone. Zhu Qing had heard Li Lan’s ringtone before, and it wasn’t this one. And if she wasn’t mistaken, the two girls singing—one had a clear, cold voice, and the other had a sweet one—that cold voice belonged to Li Lan. Although the voice was a little immature, it was unmistakably Li Lan’s.

Li Lan stood still, lost in thought, and listened to half the song. She was startled awake and quickly stood up, grabbed her phone, and left the room.

Zhu Qing looked at Li Lan’s retreating back and frowned slightly.