Double Junk - 90

As I turned on the lights and ransacked the house, I couldn’t help but think that I might end up killing Ajin with my own hands.

Despite not wanting to kill him, I was holding onto him. Despite imprisoning him in my room and monopolizing him. Today, it really felt like I might do something to Ajin. That’s how messed up my state of mind was due to the accident and the frayed nerves.

Seokju buried his face deeply into Ajin’s shoulder. Ajin’s slight shivering felt delicately apparent. Whether he spoke or not, Seokju grabbed him and made threatening remarks.

“Ajin. Ajin…”

“….”

“Even if it’s not you, it’s enough if it’s someone crappy. Just shut up and stay still. Don’t think useless thoughts. Don’t try to run away. Don’t try any stupid tricks.”

“I wasn’t trying to run away…”

“While you’re at it, what if I just kill you?”

“….”

“If I die, Flower won’t see Auntie anymore. Is that okay with you?”

Flower. At the mention of that name, Ajin felt as if his breath and even his heart had stopped. It seemed like lightning had struck his forehead. His spine froze, and it felt like it might break right there. His ears became stuffy, and the surroundings shook as if in an earthquake.

Ajin pursed his lips. However, no sound came out.

It was the well-being question he was too scared to ask Flower. Afraid that Seokju might make a fuss if he brought it up carelessly. Afraid that he might scratch a mark on her life. Yet, subtly, he hoped. Hoped that Seokju would mention Flower casually. Waiting for him to say that she was doing well, had recovered, and would be discharged soon.

“If I die, Flower won’t see Auntie anymore. Is that okay with you?”

This was not the kind of talk he had been waiting for. Ajin forcefully brushed away Seokju’s hand from his head.

“Uh, where’s Auntie… Where’s Auntie? What did you do to Auntie? Because of me?”

“Well, that’s something you should know better.”

“What does that mean?”

“….”

Seokju didn’t respond. The same cycle continued. Ajin begged and spoke, and Seokju ignored him. When Ajin earnestly asked, Seokju also ignored him. Ajin couldn’t bear this frustration of talking to the wall any longer.

Ajin’s eye area reddened. Without hesitation, he grabbed Seokju’s collar with all his might. Thin and dry, but with a single hand, his strength was quite formidable. Feeling a drowsiness in his throat, Seokju slightly narrowed his eyes at the vague pain.

“Answer me!”

“….”

“Damn it, what are you saying! How would I know! What happened to Auntie? Because of me?”

“….”

“Son of a btch! Did something weird to Auntie, huh! Really, you bstard!”

Ajin, who released Seokju’s collar, wildly swung his fists. He couldn’t control himself.

What did Auntie do wrong! She’s just a sick person! A pitiful person! The only person in the world who worries about me! What did she do to deserve this! Just torment me! Why Auntie too! There’s a limit to being a bad person!

Ajin’s fists mercilessly hit Seokju’s forehead, temples, chin, neck, shoulders, chest, and more. The violence was so insignificant because he had never hit anyone before. However, Seokju, who was receiving the blows, did not feel refreshed at all.

Seokju grabbed Ajin’s hair and forcefully pulled him backward. Ajin’s neck seemed to twist as it was.

“Ack!”

As if his neck was about to break, Ajin’s arm dangled weakly. At Seokju’s fingertips, it touched and then dropped repeatedly. Eventually, it moved in sync with Seokju’s steps.

Seokju, upon reaching the study, rummaged through the desk drawers. After a brief search, he found something and placed it on the desk. Ajin glanced at it with a sidelong glance.

It was a brown glass bottle.

The size wasn’t large. It was much smaller than Seokju’s palm and roughly the same size as Ajin’s. The surface of the cork-closed bottle was devoid of any labels.

Seokju lifted the lid with one hand. Then, he turned the glass bottle upside down. Small, round, white pills spilled out onto the desk.

They were pills, nothing extraordinary, about the size of a fingernail.

Ajin looked at them with an uneasy expression. What kind of pills were they? They didn’t seem like medicine beneficial for the body. Perhaps some kind of poison? Was Seokju finally attempting to kill him by feeding him pills, not wanting to dirty his hands?

“Sa-Sajangnim, I don’t want… I don’t want this. I didn’t… I didn’t do anything wrong.”

Ajin quickly changed his stance. Although he had experienced fear, anxiety, and pain during the days spent in Seokju’s room, feeling the impending sense of death was entirely new. He couldn’t die. He couldn’t bear the thought of not seeing Flower, even if he said otherwise. He didn’t want that. Despite his life being pathetic and lacking in any charm, he didn’t want to die such a miserable death.

However, Seokju didn’t waste a fleeting glance on Ajin’s pleading. With one hand, he picked up one of the scattered pills on the desk. Rolling it with his fingers, he grabbed another.

Ajin’s face turned pale. He imagined himself foaming at the mouth and convulsing after taking those pills.

Seokju finally raised his eyes from the pills and extended two of them towards Ajin.

“These. I made them a few days ago. Easy to swallow.”

“Uh, Sajangnim…”

“It’s an aphrodisiac, good for moments like this. I haven’t tried it myself yet. But as someone selling it, I can’t just not try it, right? Isn’t that so?”

“….”

“According to the feedback from the establishments I’ve seeded, it’s said to have a killing effect. It increases pleasure by twelve times. How about it? Ajin, do you want to try it too?”

“What, what is this…”

Seokju grinned and pulled the corners of his mouth. Then, releasing Ajin’s hair, he grabbed his chin with a delicate line. Ajin shook his head frantically.

“No, I don’t want it. I don’t want it, Sajangnim. I don’t—ugh…”

Seokju shoved two pills into Ajin’s mouth. Though Ajin belatedly clenched his jaw and bit Seokju’s hand, he didn’t flinch.

Seokju, having put the pills into Ajin’s mouth, removed his hand after checking where they went. Ajin, who had collapsed on the floor, coughed violently. The feeling of something stuck in his throat made his face flush red. His chest also tightened.

Ajin, in futile attempts, scratched the floor, trying to vomit out the pills. While he was doing this, Seokju picked up the remaining two pills and swallowed them himself.

Placing the empty bottle back on the table, Seokju slowly loosened his wristwatch. Then, he undid the buttons of his shirt. Soon, a large, thick scarab with well-defined muscles was revealed.

While Ajin, with saliva-soaked lips, looked up at him, feeling a strange sensation, Seokju casually laughed. Then, grabbing Ajin’s hair again, he pinched his jaw with a delicate touch. Ajin shook his head in protest.

“I don’t want it. I don’t want it, Sajangnim. I don’t—ugh…”

Seokju pushed two pills into Ajin’s mouth. Though Ajin, belatedly clenching his jaw and biting Seokju’s hand, didn’t flinch.

After putting the pills in Ajin’s mouth, Seokju pulled his hand away after confirming their location. Ajin, collapsed on the floor, coughed violently. The sensation of something stuck in his throat turned his face red, and his chest tightened.

In futile attempts, Ajin scratched the floor, trying to vomit out the pills. While he was doing this, Seokju picked up the remaining two pills and swallowed them himself.

Placing the empty bottle back on the table, Seokju slowly loosened his wristwatch. Then, he undid the buttons of his shirt. Soon, a large, thick scarab with well-defined muscles was revealed.

While Ajin, with saliva-soaked lips, looked up at him, feeling a strange sensation, Seokju casually laughed. Then, grabbing Ajin’s hair again, he pinched his jaw with a delicate touch. Ajin shook his head in protest.

The body, which had cooled down from rolling in the snowy field, started to tingle, generating heat. Despite eyelids feeling extremely heavy, as if he would fall asleep immediately, at the same time, they also felt remarkably light. It was almost like the joy of doing something exhilarating.

The wooden floor tilted diagonally before spinning around in circles. The lingering trace of its movement danced before Ajin’s eyes. Ajin caressed the floor with an expression as if possessed by a ghost. However, his fingers were three. No, seven.

Ajin stared at his own hand. He moved his fingers as if playing a flute. As he did so, golden traces were left in the air, as if the air itself collided, creating an electric phenomenon.

At that moment, a black shadow covered Ajin’s vision. It was Seokju. He caressed Ajin’s flushed cheek. The warm palm felt very comforting. Ajin slowly closed and then opened his eyes.

Soon, a low voice gently called Ajin like mist.

“Ajin.”

“….”

“You’re filthy.”

“….”

Ajin silently looked up at Seokju. Though he heard the word “filthy,” surprisingly, he didn’t feel bad at all. Maybe it was just that; it could be understandable. Still, he hoped Seokju’s hand wouldn’t stop caressing his cheek.

Seokju slid his hand under Ajin’s armpit, lifting his upper body.

“Shall we bathe together?”

He asked with a smile. His voice resonated softly, like listening to Seokju’s words underwater. Ajin nodded slowly.

Water filled the bathtub and splashed noisily. Ajin leaned against the edge of the bathtub, gripping it while being swept away by Seokju’s movements. His wet hair shook dully.

“Ah…, huh…, ugh, huh…”

Ajin’s face, soaked with water and heat, became hazy.

Working at a gambling den, he had seen many people doing drugs. However, he had never tried it himself. He couldn’t even afford cigarettes due to a lack of money, let alone trying those expensive drugs.

Anyway, trying drugs for the first time felt oddly indescribable. The chilling sensation that used to make bones shiver disappeared, and not being able to feel pain was even more astonishing.