Double Junk - 96

It was exhausting to do nothing. It was a truly strange experience. Since the traffic accident, Ajin had been living a life of voluntary confinement. When he left the gambling den, it felt like he had been trapped for the first time in years. He was not even aware of the discomfort.

Being confined to Seokju’s room here should have felt the same way. However, his mind was crumbling constantly. Although Seokju’s room was spacious, it seemed narrow to consider it as the world.

Doing nothing all day in this confined world, being alone without anyone to talk to, was incredibly lonely and painful. It seemed like Seokju didn’t stop tormenting him; maybe he just changed the method. Before, he touched him, kissed him, and caressed him, but perhaps it was just a different form of torment.

It felt like dry grass that was about to wither under the scorching sun. Strangely, Ajin didn’t even think about food today. Even though it was the only activity of the day, he wasn’t hungry.

He felt a sensation as if his stomach were completely empty. It wasn’t just the emptiness he felt when his stomach was empty during mealtime. It was a feeling of being completely empty, as if there was nothing in his stomach – no heartbeat, no feeling of hunger in the stomach, nothing.

In the end, Ajin left the dining table as it was. The person carrying the table paper did tilt their head but didn’t ask anything.

“…”

Ajin, sitting on his knees under the sofa, stared ahead. He was looking at a painting—a picture of blue waves crashing violently. In one corner, the characters 汰會, meaning “Taihoi,” were written.

Ajin stared at the painting all day.

Like an ordinary inland person living in poverty and a small place, Ajin had never seen the sea before.

It was vast and enormous, as if it went on forever. It was a very bright blue. Or it could be terrifyingly dark. The waves crashed fiercely like a tiger. No, it was so silent that my breath could be heard. The water was as cold as freezing feet. No, the eyes were so hot that they stung. He had only heard such expressions.

Summing up those contradictory words and drawing a conclusion, the sea was like Seokju.

It was vast, silent, very warm, and occasionally very cold. It was as kind as the clear blue sky in spring, and as harsh and dry as the night sky in the cold and dark winter. It was large enough to bring the world into this room, yet small enough to consider this room as the world.

Sometimes it became gentle and smooth, like the calm waves that tickled the skin, and sometimes it became so rough that it couldn’t be resisted, making the eyes sting, the nose and ears stuffy.

Ajin was swept away by the waves of Seokju, floating to the surface, then sinking down to the deep and dark abyss repeatedly.

Predicting his own words wasn’t difficult for Ajin. He would become a shipwreck, covered in moss, and slowly sink deeper than the abyss.

The waves in the painting constantly crashed. Ajin felt as if he were being worn out by those waves. Worn out to the point where he would eventually disappear, an absurd and terrifying but hopeful imagination.

He knew he was unjustly treated, but he never understood the feeling of depression. How did it end up like this?

Ajin, who had been repeating the imagination of himself dying, suddenly blinked his eyes. He slowly turned his head. At the end of his gaze, Seokju’s study, or more precisely, Seokju’s desk, came into view. In the black desk drawer, something round and white glittered, giving off an illusion as if it were calling him.

“…”

Ajin sluggishly got up.

Today, Seokju came home a little earlier than usual. There was no particular reason. It was simply because Ajin hadn’t eaten lunch today, according to the report.

– Hyungnim, that guy didn’t eat anything, not even a single grain of rice. He didn’t touch the spoon. Even though I thought the side dishes might be insufficient, it wasn’t the case. Hyungnim, you told him to pay attention to his meals, so I gave him a whole plate of bulgogi, pumpkin pancakes, and soybean paste stew with two side dishes of seasoned vegetables.

– But he didn’t eat, and he just stares at the wall. Something seems strange with him. His face is unnaturally pale, and it seems like he might be feeling unwell. I can’t say for sure since I only saw him briefly, but you might need to come and check on him yourself.

Upon receiving this brief report, Seokju felt his heart sink. This feeling was unfamiliar after a long time. Ever since Ajin became more amiable towards him, he had lived happily, hugging him like a fool, without any worries.

But suddenly, he refused to eat. Ajin had always considered eating very important, even when confined to his room; he consistently had his meals.

Throughout his journey back home, Seokju had various thoughts. Was something hurting him? Was he feeling unwell? Perhaps staying in the room for weeks made him depressed. He even blamed himself for being too harsh, forgetting the circumstances.

Seokju’s face darkened as he urgently opened the door. As he entered, his gaze immediately went to the sofa, where Ajin usually sat, but it was neatly arranged. Seokju, without panicking, headed to the bathroom. However, the bathroom was also empty. Seokju’s entire body tensed. The tie he had loosely worn suddenly tightened around his neck. It was hard to breathe.

Ajin was gone.

Realizing this fact, the envelope slipped from Seokju’s hand. The bag full of medicine Ajin used to eat deliciously rolled and crumpled on the floor.

Seokju immediately headed for the door to find Ajin. It was a matter of hours since he was reported not eating. What time was it now? If Ajin escaped, where could he have gone, how, and where could he be hiding? Perhaps the Jungho Faction already caught him. What should Seokju do in that case?

Grimacing, Seokju gripped the doorknob tightly.

“Huh…”

A faint moan brushed against Seokju’s ear. He turned his head sharply. His eyes, searching for the source of the moan, were busy. Eventually, they stopped at the study.

Without hesitation, Seokju moved his feet towards the study. The study was no different from this morning when he left for work. The desk was not messy, and there was no sign of expensive fountain pens or important documents missing. Only the desk chair was pushed close to the wall.

“Uh, ah…”

Another moan reached his ears, accompanied by various breathing sounds. Slowly, Seokju leaned on the desk and turned it.

The first thing he saw was white feet. Small and thin feet. A pair of feet with pinkish ankles and heels slightly darker than the pinkish color. Not far away, old trousers were lying carelessly.

Next, he saw hands tightly clenched on the empty floor. The fingertips were as red as azaleas, indicating how much the floor had been scratched.

Taking another step forward, Seokju could see the whole scene.

“Ah… hah, huh!”

Ajin was under the desk. Without any shame, he spread his legs, vigorously shaking his lower part. His face was flushed, and between his slightly parted lips, passionate moans continuously burst out.

It was a rather surprising scene, but strictly speaking, it was nothing extraordinary. Masturbation. It was a daily routine for men and not a sin. However, the reason Seokju’s face turned cold was the pill rolling between Ajin’s ejaculate scattered on the floor.

The brown bottle rolled over, tumbling here and there, dropping pills on Ajin’s thighs and chest whenever he applied the lotion.

Seeing this sight, Seokju brushed back his bangs with a big sweep and laughed.

“Ha… This crazy bastard…”

The crazy bastard was a phrase directed at Ajin and himself simultaneously.

This was his negligence. It was undoubtedly his fault for leaving the medicine so carelessly, considering he had cut off the phone line, locked the door, and even sealed the windows. He had made a mistake.

Considering Ajin too special was also his fault. For almost a month, every day without fail, Ajin had taken the medicine. It was a time when he could not help but be addicted, and indeed, Ajin was ruined like this.

But Seokju didn’t anticipate this appearance. He dared to put Ajin, who was like this, on the same level as the countless drug addicts he had seen before. He didn’t dare to consider Ajin would be like them.

Because Ajin was Ajin. He was different. Much more sacred, pure, and beautiful. Seokju never imagined him getting addicted to something like drugs.

No, did he imagine it? Did he just pretend not to know? Did he ignore Ajin, who opened his mouth eagerly, asking for medicine as soon as he came home?

It was a tragic negligence. It was all his fault. Yet, anger, anger towards Ajin, built up inside him.

“Ajin.”

Seokju called out to Ajin, sitting down in front of him. Ajin only realized the presence of Seokju’s shadow after it covered him entirely. Looking at Seokju, he smiled prettily.

“Hehe, President-nim…”

The foolish laughter didn’t sound like Ajin. It was because of the drug. Judging by the scene, it seemed he swallowed more than one or two pills. Seokju touched his forehead gently on Ajin’s sticky hair and then pulled back.

“Do you like teasing like this? Do you want to get f***ed?”

Seokju asked, looking at Ajin’s spread legs, which were subtly twisted, making his beautiful legs even more enchanting. It was a mocking question, but Ajin was in no state to judge it with any remaining sanity.

Ajin buried his face deeply in Seokju’s chest. Then, he shook his genitalia even faster. His hips were in chaos.