Expression of emotions - Chapter 4

20.

While they were drinking and chatting, Tae-young’s friend suddenly appeared at Kang‑woo’s table and picked a fight. He was complaining, saying why do you all keep looking over here? Kang‑woo had his back turned and hadn’t really been paying attention, so he hadn’t noticed, but it seemed that the women at the same table as him had been glancing over at the table where Tae-young was sitting and whispering among themselves.

By that time, some time had already passed, so at this table and that table, everyone had drunk to a certain extent. Because of that, everyone’s self‑control over their actions was starting to loosen a little.

Kang‑woo, wondering if maybe Tae-young was looking this way, turned his head. But Tae-young was nowhere to be seen. Kang‑woo rolled his eyes around, scanning the inside of the store.

Tae-young’s friend, very drunk, kept standing in front of Kang‑woo’s group’s table, repeating over and over again that he was offended.

Kang‑woo didn’t really know what he had done wrong, and he thought that apologizing just because the other side says they feel bad should only be done once or twice. But Tae-young’s friend showed no sign of going back to his seat and kept standing there, repeating the same thing. On top of that, there was now no one left at Tae-young’s table to come and stop him, the table was emptier than before and even Kang‑woo’s own group members, who at first had just been taken aback and embarrassed, were gradually starting to feel irritated.

“Fine, we won’t look anymore, so just go away.”

In the end, the man sitting next to Kang‑woo stood up from his seat, lightly pushed Tae‑young’s friend on the shoulder, and said that. And in an instant, that turned into a physical scuffle. Only for a brief moment were they flustered, and then Tae‑young, who must have been outside, opened the door and came with one of his friends. Tae‑young looked at the situation unfolding before him, seeming a little surprised, and then strode straight over to Kang‑woo’s table.

Kang‑woo, caught between his classmate who was grappling and Tae‑young’s friend, was trying to stop the two when he was suddenly hit by a stray punch from Tae‑young’s friend. Kang‑woo, having drunk a fair amount himself, felt his anger flare up at that moment and roughly shoved Tae‑young’s friend. Then he tried to throw a punch back in the same way. At that moment, Tae‑young suddenly reached out from behind and quickly yanked his friend, who had been about to be hit by Kang‑woo, out of the way.

Tae‑young’s friend shook off Tae‑young’s hand, lost his balance, and collapsed forward toward the table, breaking a bottle of alcohol. The shards of the broken bottle scattered across the table and over to Kang‑woo’s seat. At that moment, Taeyoung’s friend, swaying, toppled completely in Kang-woo’s direction.

Kang-woo, carried by that force, ended up sitting back down in his seat where the shards had scattered, and unavoidably pressed his hand against the broken pieces. Kang‑woo grimaced, and the group members who had been standing around in front of him, not knowing what to do, let out a shout.

21.

“Hey. Are you okay?”

Tae-young grabbed Kang-woo’s arm and pulled him up, but Kang-woo immediately shook off his hand. His mood was foul.

“Take your friend and get lost.”

When Kang-woo looked at his hand again, the bl00d that had only clotted up earlier was now running down.

“You’re bleeding.”

“I said mind your own business and go.”

Kang-woo frowned, his eyes fixed on Tae-young, who was still standing there looking at him. Even after being told to leave, Tae-young didn’t respond, he just stayed there quietly, staring at Kang-woo’s hand.

“Uh… so, you two… know each other?”

From beside him, one of the older women in their project group approached cautiously. Maybe because they hadn’t acknowledged each other all night until now, and were suddenly talking, she looked curious, glancing between the two of them even in the middle of all the commotion.

“No.”

Kang-woo answered at the same time—

“Yes”, Tae-young answered.

22.

The pub was still in chaos.

Even so, Tae-young, looking like the most sober person in the room, just stood there watching, as if it didn’t matter to him whether his drunk friends fought or not. Then, without warning, he grabbed Kang-woo by the shoulder, pulling him toward the door. Kang-woo was caught off guard as he was dragged out.

“Hey, with all that going on, you’re just gonna walk out like this?”

“I’m not the one who started that mess. They’ll figure it out on their own. And you, look at your hand. At least take care of it. Thanks to that, I could leave without having to waste time breaking them up.”

“…”

“You’re kinda irritating, you know that? The only reason I’m even talking to you is because you’re Kim Seung-joon’s friend.”

“…”

“Still, how the hell has Kim Seung-joon managed to stay friends with you for twenty years? You must be grateful to him every day.”

From the way he was rambling, it was clear Tae-young wasn’t his usual self either. That guy might look perfectly fine when he’s been drinking, but his mouth turns into a motor. Kang-woo felt like he’d just learned something entirely useless.

Tae-young grabbed Kang-woo’s forearm and headed toward a convenience store near the  pub. From the palm of his hand, cut by shards, bl00d trickled down his fingers and dripped to the ground.

What is this, a horror scene or what.

Because of that, Kang-woo couldn’t go inside the convenience store, and Taeyoung came back out holding medicine.

“How much was it?”

Kang-woo asked as he stared blankly at the plastic bag.

“180,000 won. Wanna pay me back?”

“…Do you seriously think that counts as a joke?”

“Sit here. I’ll put some medicine on it.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. Hand it over. I’ll do it myself when I get home.”

“I said sit. I bought this, didn’t I?”

What, now he’s showing off because he bought the medicine? Should I just leave right now? For some reason, Kang-woo really didn’t want to obey Tae-young so easily, so when told to sit, he hesitated for a moment.

Tae-young set the plastic bag with the medicine down on the parasol table in front of the convenience store and leaned against it with one leg propped up, staring at Kang-woo with a tilted gaze. Kang-woo couldn’t be bothered to argue or play some petty mind game, and besides, his hand stung, so he sat into the chair. The fact that it looked like he was meekly following instructions left a sour taste in his mouth.

Without a word, Tae-young rummaged in the bag and took out some disinfectant. The only sound was the rustle of the plastic, which, for some reason, made Kang-woo tense.

And, when Tae-young took off the cap, Kang-woo assumed he’d dab the disinfectant carefully over the injured spot. That’s what people normally do, after all.

But instead, Tae-young popped the cap and poured the disinfectant straight onto Kang-woo’s palm in a full-on gush. Not even a token blow of air. Just that sudden, rough action, so abrupt it made Kang-woo flinch. The already uncomfortable palm instantly turned cold and stung like hell. He was dumbfounded, and a surge of irritation shot through him.

“Hey, you brainless bastard!”

“What now? Why the hell are you complaining when I’m helping you?”

When Kang-woo snapped and shouted, glaring at Tae-young, Tae-young seemed to lose his temper for a moment too, his gaze turning icy as he shot back.

“Did you think I’m throwing a fit? Want me to really throw a fit for you?”

“Yeah. Go ahead. Hard to believe someone with a temper like yours was ever a pushover.”

Ah!!! He said pushover again! Making me remember something I want to forget!

“Ah, fvck. Hey!”

“Fvck. You know what, just thinking about it pisses me off. Hey, do you think I’m an easy? Why the hell are you only abrasive with me, like sandpaper?”

Kang-woo, stung by Tae-young’s mocking tone, spat out a curse, and Tae-young cursed right back, his brows furrowing. When Tae-young got serious, the long, thin line of his double eyelids made his eyes look even sharper.

Not that Kang-woo hadn’t already thought Tae-young looked like a punk. He’d always had a cool, chilly air about him, and it just made that punkish vibe worse.

They locked eyes like they were having a staring contest, but Kang-woo was the first to look away. It wasn’t that he was scared, but with Tae-young just continuing to stare, he kind of… got intimidated.

A brief silence fell between them. The disinfectant Tae-young had dumped over Kang-woo’s palm had dried in the cold night air, leaving his hand icy. His hand felt chilled. Was he going to just leave in a huff now? Well, if he did, I’d just head home too.

With that thought, Kang-woo let the uncomfortable silence stretch on for a moment.

When Kang-woo let out a short sigh, Tae-young scratched his forehead and eased his expression. Then he roughly wiped Kang-woo’s hand with a tissue and even applied ointment. Whether it was because of his mood or just his usual way of doing things, Tae-young’s touch was still clumsy and rough.

When it came time to put on a bandage, Tae-young held Kang-woo’s palm steady with his head lowered. Between them, the only sounds were the tearing of the wrapper and the pressing of the bandage. Kang-woo’s palm itched. It seemed like just a couple of bandages would’ve covered the larger part of the wound, but Tae-young apparently intended to use up the whole pack—pasting them on messily, one after another.

The crown of Tae-young’s head, right in front of his eyes, looked unnecessarily serious. Suddenly, for no reason, Kang-woo felt like he might laugh, so he pressed his lips together.

Looking at Tae-young’s neatly shaped head, Kang-woo felt a strange mix of emotions. Come to think of it, there’d never been an occasion for him to look at the top of Tae-young’s head before. Kang-woo wasn’t short himself, but Tae-young was just a little taller than him. Kang-woo had always been satisfied with his own appearance, to the point where he thought wanting more would be greedy. But right now—for the first time in his life—looking at Tae-young made him feel annoyed at not being taller. Tae-young’s looks, too, were subtly irritating.

While Kang-woo was having this brief reflection, Tae-young said he was done and stood up.

“Are you heading home?”

“Then what—should I go back to the others like this?” Kang-woo lifted his hand slightly.

“Just say ‘yes’ or ‘no.’ I honestly don’t know how someone with your temper even makes friends.”

“…You sure do care a lot. Mind your own business.”

Kang-woo’s replies to Tae-young stayed curt and prickly.

23.

Kang-woo’s apartment was near the campus anyway, not far at all. It took less than ten minutes on foot, and without really thinking about it, Tae-young ended up walking with him all the way to his place.

When they arrived in front of the building, Kang-woo suddenly realized something was off and glanced at Tae-young.

“Hey… why’d you come all the way here?”

“Good question.”

“There’s nothing to drink in my place except water, it’s late, so just head home.”

Standing in front of the building’s entrance, Kang-woo shoved his uninjured hand into his pocket and looked at Tae-young as he said it. At Kang-woo’s last words, Tae-young let out a short, incredulous laugh.

“Cold, aren’t you.”

“What, you wanna come up?”

“Not really.”

“Right. I also think it’s dangerous to be gay at this hour.”

“There you go again—being gay, huh? Even if you invited me up, I wouldn’t go. So hurry up and get inside.”

The moment Tae-young turned away, Kang-woo shifted his body toward the stairs to head up. He took one step before realizing he hadn’t thanked Tae-young. He hesitated, thinking he should at least say that much, then turned around. And right at that moment, Tae-young happened to turn around too, and their eyes met.

Why’s he turning around?

They stared at each other for about two seconds, Kang-woo narrowing his brow in confusion—then, almost at the same time, both of them frowned.

“What.”

“What.”

By then, Kang-woo had already forgotten why he’d turned around in the first place, and it just turned into another spat. Tae-young turned away first this time. Kang-woo let out a dry laugh, opened the entrance door, and went inside.