I Fell In Love With My Friend's Younger Brother Who Has A Low Sense Of Presence. - Chapter 46

Chapter 46: Tell Me What I Should Do Now?

Su Shibei was terribly worried when he learned on set that his brother had been in a car accident. He immediately asked the director for leave, rushed to the airport, and took the nearest flight back. It was already four o’clock in the afternoon when he arrived at the hospital.

As soon as he arrived at the ward door, he ran in and looked left and right at Su Shixiao, anxiously saying, “Brother, are you okay? Oh, why didn’t you tell me earlier? I was so worried.”

“I’m fine.” Su Shixiao didn’t expect them to tell Xiaobei as well. Reluctantly, he pushed his younger brother, who was lingering around him, down onto a stool and said, “Don’t disturb Grandma’s sleep.”

Su Shibei only then spotted Grandma sleeping in the other bed. After looking around and not seeing Grandpa, he asked, “Where’s Grandpa?”

Su Shixiao: “Grandpa went to get some water.”

“What about you? You were in a car accident and didn’t tell us. If it weren’t for me finding out, we might never have known.” Su Shibei said to him face to face, a serious expression on his face.

“It’s not serious, is it? If it were serious, the doctors and the police would have notified you long ago.” Su Shixiao knew from his question that his brother and the others hadn’t told him about their morning conversation. He didn’t want him to know; it would be awkward, letting his younger brother know that he envied and was jealous of him.

Su Shibei lost his usual playful smile, appearing remarkably serious, even creating a more oppressive vibe. “Brother, isn’t a car accident serious? What does serious mean? Near death?”

Su Shixiao, seeing the serious Su Shibei for the first time, was startled for a few seconds. He didn’t respond to his questioning, but instead asked, “What answer do you want?”

“Whether it was bullying as a child, injuries from Sanda training, trouble with others as an adult, plummeting grades, or the car accident you’ve experienced, from childhood to adulthood, no matter what difficulties you’ve encountered, sad or happy, you’ve never told us. You’ve always carried it all on your own.” Su Shibei peeled back his thoughts and confronted Su Shixiao, his eyes reddening slightly as he spoke. Ever since he learned of his brother’s car accident, his first thought had been to explain everything to him. He feared that if something more serious happened one day, his brother would truly endure it all on his own without a word.

“Sometimes I wish you could rely on us more and trust us, instead of hiding everything inside like you do now. You seem so close to us, yet there’s an invisible veil, just like your personality, separating us coldly.”

Su Shixiao looked at him calmly and spoke slowly, “Of course it’s easy for you, but I’ve been ignored by my parents, grandparents, and brother since I was a child. You grew up surrounded by all their love. I’m only a year older than you, so why do they favor you? They revolve around you, thinking of you in everything. They remember your favorite toys, your favorite food, your hobbies, but I’m always the one who’s ignored. They don’t remember my favorite toys, food, or hobbies. They’re always the last to know about everything that happens at home, or they tell me about it. Like that last trip.”

“Grandpa always trims your yew trees first to make you happy, while mine always… He was always in line behind you, taking you out to visit friends. I wanted to go one time, but Grandpa couldn’t stand the thought of two people. He said you were too young and told me to give way to you while you stayed home to play with your older brother. He then carried you out of the house without even looking back. I just watched you quietly from behind. Su Shixiao’s eyes were filled with emotion. He leaned closer to Su Shibei, who looked stunned and bewildered, and continued:

“Grandma always made you your favorite fruit tea every summer. She always made passion fruit juice for me, but what she didn’t know was that I didn’t like passion fruit at all. I preferred pure milk fruit tea. One time, you got first place in the class on an exam, and everyone went to a restaurant to celebrate. Grandma even bought you your favorite toy as a reward. I also worked hard to get first place, but I only received a few compliments from them, nothing else. It was only after I told Grandma I wanted a reward that she bought me the toy.”

Su Shibei became more and more shocked as she listened, feeling increasingly guilty and remorseful. Her heart ached, and tears welled up in her eyes.

Su Shixiao continued, as if venting his frustration. “Dad always patiently listened to your stories. When you were little, I often loved holding you while we went shopping together. I wanted to be held by Dad, but you always monopolized Dad. Mom and Dad always told me that my brother was still young, so I should let him go. I walked behind, holding Mom’s hand. Do you know how envious I was? I kept glancing at you all the way.”

“Do you want to keep listening? This kind of thing has happened so many times.” Su Shixiao sneered. “And Mom, she remembers everything you said. She remembered you wanted an iPad, and she bought it as soon as a new one came out, but she didn’t buy one for me. She knew I used it to draw, but she only remembered that you liked scrambled eggs with tomatoes, yet she always thought I liked scrambled eggs with tomatoes. And brother, over two months ago, I was framed and fired at the company. I finally mustered up the courage to ask you for help, but before I could even finish what I wanted him to do, upon hearing you were being bullied on set, he jumped in without hesitation. Only after your problem was resolved did he remember I was asking him for help.

“Stop talking! That’s enough, second brother.” Su Shibei finally couldn’t hold back her tears. The more she listened, the more heartbroken she felt. She blamed herself, felt guilty, and felt overwhelmed. A slight pain pierced her heart. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I didn’t know all this time.”

Looking back now, every incident rings true. Things I haven’t mentioned flash through my mind one by one. It was them who made my second brother become aloof and distant person. It was them who always ignored him, never truly cared about him.

Su Shixiao recounted the painful events one by one, his emotions already spiraling out of control. His eyes were tearful, red at the corners. “It’s not enough, it’s not enough. You know how jealous I was of you. Back then, I thought, if only I were you, what would it be like? Why would they ignore me just because I’m sensible and precocious? I want them to love me, to pay attention to me. Am I wrong? Tell me how I can give you all my love, how can I make you part of my world? How can I tell you everything? How can I finally lift the veil and let you know? Hmm, Xiaobei?”

Su Shixiao shouted passionately, “Su Shibei, tell me what to do?”