I Fell In Love With My Friend's Younger Brother Who Has A Low Sense Of Presence. - Chapter 47
Chapter 47 I Just Want to Be Alone
Su Shibei shuddered, lowering his head and choking out sobs, “Brother, I’m sorry.”
Under the guise of concern for him, without knowing the reason, he presumptuously tried to persuade him to learn to trust and rely on them, accusing him of being indifferent to them, not realizing they were the true culprits.
Grandma Su was awakened by Su Shixiao’s loud yell. It sounded like Xiaoxiao was arguing with Xiaobei. She quickly sat up in bed and asked hurriedly, “Xiaoxiao, what’s wrong, Xiaobei? Stop arguing. Let’s talk it out nicely.”
Su Shixiao suppressed his anger and didn’t get angry at Grandma Su. Grandma Su, who already had a weak heart, said calmly, “It’s okay, Grandma.”
Then he told Su Shibei, “Go back. I don’t want to see you right now. There’s no point saying anything now. The damage is done, and I’m grown up.”
Grandma Su became even more worried after hearing this. She anxiously glanced from Xiaoxiao to Xiaobei, their eyes reddening. Xiaobei’s face was especially pale. She felt distressed and worried, but she couldn’t offer any comfort.
“Second brother, I…” Su Shibei didn’t know how he left the ward. It felt like his brain had blocked all his senses. After a few blank seconds, he realized he had reached the hospital gate.
Grandpa Su returned from buying water and arrived at the ward door, just in time to overhear their entire conversation. He felt a pang of pain, especially when Xiaoxiao listed the evidence that they all favored Xiaobei. His eyes welled up. He didn’t know how to make up for all the hurt Xiaoxiao had caused him since childhood, and he couldn’t make Xiaoxiao erase the estrangement she had caused them. But he had to do his best to make amends; this couldn’t go on.
He saw Xiaobei leave the ward, lost in thought. Worried, he hurried after him. He called out to Xiaobei several times, but he ignored him.
Su Shibei only came to his senses when he reached the hospital gate. He heard his grandfather’s voice and turned to see him. His nose suddenly sank. He hugged Grandpa Su and choked out, “Grandpa, my second brother must have had such a hard time as a child. It’s all my fault.”
Su Shibei fell into a deep well of self-blame. Grandpa Su stroked his hair. “Xiaobei, it’s our responsibility. It’s our fault. We neglected him, didn’t care about him, and were too partial.”
“It’s all my fault. If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t be like this.”
He knew Xiaobei was in a terrible mood, so he could only hug him and comfort him as best he could. “Xiaobei, I’ve called your brother. He’ll be here to pick you up soon. You can go home with him. If you go alone, Grandpa can’t bear to leave you.”
Su Shibei was deeply troubled, but to avoid worrying his grandfather, he nodded and agreed.
In the ward, Grandma Su’s face was filled with worry at the thought of Xiaobei’s distraught departure, and she paced anxiously. Su Shixiao glanced at her and said without emotion, “Xiaobei hasn’t gone far yet. If you’re worried, go out and look for him. I’m fine on my own, since I came all the way here anyway.”
Grandma Su was speechless. “Xiaoxiao, I’m worried about you too.”
Su Shixiao knew what his grandmother was thinking. She was just afraid he’d accuse them of favoring Xiaobei again. But seeing how worried his grandmother was at her age, he said, “Grandma, call Grandpa and have him go find Xiaobei.”
“Yes, yes, I’ll call now.”
Grandma Su immediately called Grandpa Su, and only then did she feel relieved to know that he was right beside Xiaobei. It was already past five in the afternoon when Su Shizhi arrived at the hospital. He brought his insulated lunch box to the ward and casually placed it on the table. “Xiaoxiao, I brought you dinner. Remember to eat it while it’s hot.”
Su Shixiao stared at his phone and replied, “Yeah, I know.”
Su Shizhi placed another insulated lunch box on Grandma’s table. “Grandma, this is dinner I brought you. Eat it while it’s hot. I’ll take Grandpa home later. We can’t accommodate so many people here.”
Grandma Su smiled kindly at her eldest grandson and said, “Okay.”
Su Shizhi found a seat and sat down. The atmosphere instantly quieted down. It was mainly because he didn’t know what else to talk about with Xiaoxiao; they rarely chatted together before.
Su Shixiao got up from the bed, sat down, and opened his lunch box. “Brother, when will you be back?”
“I’ll stay with you for about half an hour. I have to take Xiaobei and Grandpa home later,” Su Shizhi replied.
“Grandma, go back too. It’s uncomfortable sleeping here.” Su Shixiao just wanted to be alone and didn’t want Grandma to stay.
Grandma Su: “How can this be, Xiaoxiao? You need someone to take care of you.”
“I’m fine now. I can get out of bed to use the restroom, get a drink of water, and turn off the lights. Besides, I’m used to sleeping alone. Just have Grandma and Grandpa come early tomorrow to bring me breakfast. I don’t need anyone to stay overnight.” Su Shixiao said firmly, not giving them any chance. “Grandma, I just want to be alone today.”
Grandma Su sighed and agreed. “Okay, your grandpa and I will come and keep you company tomorrow morning.”
Su Shizhi sensed something strange between them. He had just learned a little from Grandpa’s words, but it wasn’t much. He opened his mouth but didn’t ask.
Back in the car, Su Shizhi saw Xiaobei still looking distraught, and his brows furrowed slightly.
Grandpa Su saw Grandma Su getting in the car and asked, “Aren’t you staying to keep Xiaoxiao company?”
Grandma Su was also upset. “I wanted to, but Xiaoxiao wouldn’t let me. He shut me down, so I had no choice but to agree.”
Su Shizhi returned to the front door and glanced at Xiaobei, who was sitting in the passenger seat with a depressed look on his face. After his grandparents got out, he couldn’t help but ask, “What happened between you and Xiaoxiao?”
Su Shibei finally told his brother what had happened in the hospital. “It’s all my fault. My second brother must have been very sad when he was little.”
Su Shizhi realized that Su Shixiao had come to him because he had been falsely accused and fired and asked for his help, but he had simply ignored him because of Xiaobei. His eyes were filled with self-blame and regret. He suddenly remembered that Su Shixiao had come to the racecourse to see Nan Yanzhou. It must have been because of this incident. Thinking of this, he couldn’t help but clench his fists and mentally cursed himself as a jerk.
He calmed down, grasped Xiaobei’s shoulders, and said seriously, “Xiaobei, don’t take all the blame on yourself. We all have responsibilities, but the primary responsibility lies with us. We neglected him and didn’t care enough about him. We can only try to make amends, make changes, and bring him into our lives. But it might be too late. Xiaoxiao no longer needs us, and it’s impossible for him to have no feelings towards us. We can only help him feel that we truly care about him, and gradually let him trust and rely on us.”
“Yes.” Su Shibei certainly understood what he meant, but he still blamed himself and felt very uncomfortable.