I'm Actually Panicking Because My Heart Doesn't Beat (GL) - Chapter 69

Everything happened way too fast.

So fast that Guan Xiaoxuan didn’t even realize the A-grade item she was carrying had been crushed by the woman’s bare hands.

The pale golden light disappeared the moment it was crushed. The woman released her grip in front of Guan Xiaoxuan, and a cloud of golden dust floated in the air, then vanished without a trace.

An A-grade special item was literally crushed into powder by this woman!

Xing Tianqing’s alarm immediately went off. She dragged Guan Xiaoxuan back into the hospital room and grabbed the walkie-talkie. “Attack with full force!”

Guan Xiaoxuan was pulled inside just in time to see that the woman’s entire arm had turned into white bones—her flesh hung off like dried strips of meat. Yet her eyes still locked tightly onto Guan Xiaoxuan.

“You are mine.”

Bang! Xing Tianqing kicked the door shut, pressed Guan Xiaoxuan’s hand against the wall, and leaned against the corner. Holding a golden book in one hand and a gun in the other, she stared hard at the doorway.

“Don’t leave my sight,” Xing Tianqing said seriously to Guan Xiaoxuan. “Hold on tight.”

Guan Xiaoxuan was a little scared. She held onto Xing Tianqing’s arm, stunned. She never thought that woman could actually destroy an A-grade item.

Though the red-clothed woman was injured—the whole arm was just bone now—it was clear the wounds were severe.

But on the other hand, it proved how powerful this woman really was.

No wonder she was famous enough to be in textbooks. She was really fierce…

While Guan Xiaoxuan’s thoughts wandered, she looked down at the empty chain and started to worry. What if the A-grade item was destroyed while in her hands? What if she got blamed?

Most likely, it would be Xing Tianqing who’d get in trouble.

She didn’t even know how to compensate for an item damaged in battle.

Well, this should count as normal wear and tear, right?

Guan Xiaoxuan frowned, thinking hard.

As the noise outside died down, Xing Tianqing gradually relaxed her guard. After the last gunshot, there was silence for a long while.

Just as Guan Xiaoxuan was about to speak, a colleague’s voice came over the walkie-talkie.

“Captain Xing, that woman has left.”

Xing Tianqing visibly exhaled in relief. She didn’t put away her things immediately, only holstered her gun and asked, “Any casualties?”

“Two team members got minor injuries.”

“Send them straight to the hospital. Be careful.”

“Roger.”

After arranging care for the wounded, Xing Tianqing led Guan Xiaoxuan out of the room.

Outside, the team members stood guard in stairwells and corridors. When they saw Xing Tianqing, they approached quickly.

“Captain Xing, the red-clothed female creature has left. What’s the next move?”

Xing Tianqing’s face was grim; she said nothing.

This battle had two lightly injured team members, a damaged A-grade item, and the creature escaped.

In every way, this was a complete failure.

Xing Tianqing would definitely have to write a report. But more than worrying about that or any punishment, she was now most concerned about Guan Xiaoxuan’s safety.

She glanced back at Guan Xiaoxuan, tightly holding her hand. “She got away.”

“Yeah,” Guan Xiaoxuan said, looking at Xing Tianqing and then the others, forcing a small smile to comfort them. “But at least we seriously injured her, right?”

Everyone stared at Guan Xiaoxuan, but no one felt any relief.

That heavy injury to the creature came at the cost of an A-grade item—and their department didn’t have many of those.

A heavy gloom settled over the team. Even Xing Tianqing’s expression darkened. This mission was a total failure. Guan Xiaoxuan no longer had anything to protect herself with, which made her feel even more helpless.

Xing Tianqing first took Guan Xiaoxuan back, while the others continued clearing the old Sixth Hospital site, wiping out any remaining creatures.

Back home, Xing Tianqing held Guan Xiaoxuan’s hand without letting go, afraid that if she did, the other might disappear.

Now that the A-grade item was gone, only she could protect her.

“Guan Xiaoxuan.”

Entering the door, Xing Tianqing didn’t turn on the lights. Standing in the dark, she turned to look at Guan Xiaoxuan and said, “I’m applying for another special item tonight. If everything goes well, it should arrive tomorrow. Don’t worry, we still have a chance.”

Guan Xiaoxuan looked at Xing Tianqing, noticing her serious expression and tightly furrowed brows. The worry and panic in her eyes were hard to hide.

Why so nervous?

If she was going to die, she was going to die. People have to die eventually.

Guan Xiaoxuan smiled and reached out to gently touch Xing Tianqing’s cheek. “I’ve already died once before. I’m not afraid. I know everyone’s tried their best. If I can’t escape this, then I’m just meant to die.”

Xing Tianqing rubbed her warm palm against Guan Xiaoxuan’s face and said hoarsely, “We still have time…”

“Yes, still time.” Guan Xiaoxuan cupped her face and said, “Maybe today, maybe tomorrow, I’ll disappear from your sight. I hope you’ll make me a tombstone, and bury me with my parents.”

Even though her soul wasn’t the original Guan Xiaoxuan’s, at least in death she should rest beside her parents.

Though she wasn’t even sure if she could stay much longer.

Xing Tianqing shook her head. “Don’t say that. We’ll think of other ways…”

Guan Xiaoxuan looked at her deeply. She already knew in her heart that Xing Tianqing probably liked her—otherwise, who would care so much about someone for no reason?

Seeing the worry and fear in her eyes made Guan Xiaoxuan feel warm inside.

To be able to feel someone’s kindness before dying… maybe then, even death wouldn’t leave much regret.

“Xing Tianqing.”

Guan Xiaoxuan cupped her face and leaned in. “Thank you.”

In the darkness, Xing Tianqing opened her arms and pulled Guan Xiaoxuan close. The warmth of her embrace made Guan Xiaoxuan pause for a moment.

She smelled the scent of sunshine on her—warm and clean.

Xing Tianqing held her tight and said nothing, but Guan Xiaoxuan understood what she wanted to say.

Some things, some people, are just beyond help.

“I’ll find another way,” Xing Tianqing whispered close to her ear, clutching her waist like holding onto a last straw. “There has to be a way…”

In a dream, Guan Xiaoxuan sat alone on her sofa at home. She kept feeling like that woman would show up again—but she waited a long time, and nothing else happened.

Maybe today’s events had delayed the woman from appearing in her dream?

Feeling puzzled, Guan Xiaoxuan made herself a cup of black tea. Watching the liquid darken, she breathed in the rich aroma and drank it with satisfaction.

She was going to die in a couple of days. Now, she was completely at peace.

She should have died a month or two ago—she was just enjoying a few extra months of life. Now she was content. After she woke tomorrow and gave her final words, she could die calmly.

As she sipped her tea, she turned and saw Bai Zhiqi rummaging through the kitchen cabinets, pulling out Guan Xiaoxuan’s treasured ice cream from the fridge. Sitting across on the sofa, Bai Zhiqi unwrapped it and said while eating, “You’re about to die, and yet your heart is so big?”

Guan Xiaoxuan drank her tea and replied helplessly, “What else can I do? I’m waiting for that woman to come scare me. I crossed her today—I probably won’t make it out in one piece.”

She smiled wryly and said, “How about I give you my life? Since I’m going to die anyway, might as well keep it in the family.”

“Don’t drag me into this,” Bai Zhiqi said. “That woman is so possessive—if I took your life, wouldn’t she just eat me instead?”

Guan Xiaoxuan put down her tea, puzzled. “Why is she so stubborn? Can’t she just sit down and talk things through?”

“Some creatures act purely on instinct,” Bai Zhiqi said. “Besides, creatures as good as me are rare.”

Guan Xiaoxuan looked at her, curious. “How’s your investigation going? Do I still have a chance?”

Bai Zhiqi shook her spoon and said to Guan Xiaoxuan, “I asked a few of the eerie beings, and none of them could handle that woman. You have to understand, she’s terrifying—she eats both humans and ghosts. Who in their right mind would dare mess with her?”

Guan Xiaoxuan blinked. “But?”

“But I did hear about someone who might be able to help you,” Bai Zhiqi leaned in and plopped down next to Guan Xiaoxuan. “Lately, there’s been talk in the eerie community about a person. Although he’s human, he’s supposed to be very powerful and friendly toward these eerie beings. I think he could help you.”

The eerie community?

Guan Xiaoxuan was surprised—these eerie beings actually had their own circle? She thought they were all just out for themselves, causing trouble, but they actually communicated.

Does that mean most eerie beings are smart enough to talk?

She didn’t dwell on it, just smiled faintly and asked, “What’s this person’s name?”

Bai Zhiqi said, “I heard his last name is Jin.”

Hearing the name, Guan Xiaoxuan froze for a moment.

“Is he a middle-aged man named Jin Cheng?” she asked.

Bai Zhiqi looked curious. “How do you know? Do you know him too?”

“Not exactly,” Guan Xiaoxuan replied thoughtfully. “I’ve just heard about him.”

She paused, then asked, “You said he’s powerful and friendly to eerie beings? But he’s human—why would he be friendly to them?”

“I don’t know,” Bai Zhiqi shrugged, looking at her. “You’re human too, and you have a good relationship with eerie beings, right? Why don’t you tell me?”

“I’m only friendly to those eerie beings who show me kindness. The ones that want to hurt me, I deal with,” Guan Xiaoxuan said.

“Tch.”

Bai Zhiqi got up and said, “That’s all I know. The rest is up to you.”

“Thanks.”

“No problem.”

Bai Zhiqi took a bite of her ice cream, glanced at Guan Xiaoxuan again, and her gaze settled on her faint shadow. “Looks like you only have two days left. Good luck. If you do become one of the eerie, I hope you’ll still remember me.”

After Bai Zhiqi left, the coffee table was left with half-eaten ice cream and a half-drunk cup of black tea.

Guan Xiaoxuan leaned against the sofa, frowning slightly.

Jin Cheng.

After all this time, she was connected to him again.

Thinking of that mixed-race middle-aged man’s face, Guan Xiaoxuan felt something strange—like fate was somehow pulling them together…