I'm Actually Panicking Because My Heart Doesn't Beat (GL) - Chapter 83
Guan Xiaoxuan stepped cautiously into her room, scanning the surroundings but not noticing anything unusual.
The table and chairs were exactly as she had left them before going out. The dishes she hadn’t bothered to wash were still sitting on the dining table. Even the crumpled socks on the bathroom floor were untouched. Everything seemed just like before.
But Guan Xiaoxuan couldn’t shake the feeling that someone had been in her home.
It was a strange and subtle feeling. In the past, she might’ve brushed it off. But now, she wasn’t the type to ignore such things anymore.
Still wearing her backpack, she changed her shoes and walked around the apartment. After a brief check, she grabbed a soda from the fridge and sipped it while heading back to her bedroom.
These days, Guan Xiaoxuan’s instincts had become extremely sharp. In the upper corner of her wardrobe, close to the wall, she noticed a tiny black dot.
That little black speck almost blended into the shadows of the crevice, but Guan Xiaoxuan still spotted it.
A camera?
She placed the soda on her bedroom desk, her brows furrowing.
Who installed a surveillance camera in her room?
As far as she knew, she hadn’t offended anyone lately. She was diligent at school, studied at home in the evenings, and only occasionally went out to handle missions from the Bureau of the Strange. She hadn’t done anything suspicious.
So why would someone bug her apartment?
The thought made her scalp tingle. She tossed her backpack on the bed and headed into the bathroom.
Just as she closed the bathroom door, Song Yi suddenly appeared, startling her.
[Someone… is watching you…]
Even without Song Yi saying so, Guan Xiaoxuan had already figured that out.
But Song Yi wasn’t the type to pop up without a reason, so Guan Xiaoxuan frowned and asked, “Did you notice something?”
Song Yi nodded, glancing around the bathroom.
[There’s nothing… in here…]
“No camera in here?” Guan Xiaoxuan followed Song Yi’s gaze and looked around. Whoever installed the surveillance still had some decency—at least they didn’t bug the bathroom.
This was probably the safest room in the house. Guan Xiaoxuan let out a long sigh of relief, sat down on the toilet lid, and asked Song Yi, “Do you know who’s watching me?”
Song Yi neither nodded nor shook her head. Instead, her eyes stayed fixed on the bathroom window. Then she pointed outside.
Guan Xiaoxuan paused, then quickly stood up and looked out.
From this angle, the bathroom window overlooked a flowerbed downstairs. There were some fitness machines nearby, and plenty of elderly people and kids gathered around chatting. Since it was after work hours, even more people were outside now.
As she scanned the crowd, she spotted a few men in plain clothes sitting on a bench, fiddling with their phones.
They looked strong and well-built. Their short haircuts were clean and tidy. Under their jackets, muscles bulged, and their calves looked powerful—these guys were clearly trained.
Guan Xiaoxuan had a feeling these were the ones who bugged her place.
As if sensing her gaze, the plainclothes men looked up. Guan Xiaoxuan quickly stepped away from the window, frowning deeply.
Why was she hiding?
She lived on such a high floor—even if someone looked up, it would take a while to figure out which apartment was hers. And even then, they probably couldn’t see her clearly.
Besides, she hadn’t done anything wrong. There was no reason to feel guilty just because someone was watching her.
Only those with secrets had to hide!
She gave herself a pep talk, then went back to the window. But this time, the plainclothes men were gone—vanished without a trace.
She now knew her apartment was bugged, but she didn’t know who those men were.
Why were they watching her?
Had she done something that couldn’t be explained?
Those men looked sharp and well-trained. Could they be police? If so, it might explain why they spared the bathroom from surveillance.
Maybe they knew her background—alone, a young woman—and didn’t want to cross a line.
At least they had some conscience.
But that just raised more questions. Why her?
Guan Xiaoxuan sat on the toilet lid, thinking hard. The only thing that came to mind was that investigation Xing Wenjun did on her last time at the Bureau of the Strange.
Did she say something wrong during the interview? Was that why they were watching her?
She couldn’t figure it out. But staying in the bathroom too long would seem odd, especially now that her every move was likely being recorded.
Flushing the toilet, she left the bathroom.
Like usual, she rested a bit before making dinner. She still had Professor Fang Gu’s theory class later and needed to get everything done before class started.
Guan Xiaoxuan decided not to expose the surveillance yet. She wanted to see what exactly they were hoping to catch.
Professor Fang Gu’s class was just as dull as ever, but she still paid close attention, even taking notes. After the two-hour lecture, she went to the bathroom to wash up and got ready for bed.
Before sleeping, she opened a game and pretended to play for a while. Around 11 p.m., she turned off the lights and went to sleep.
Earlier in the bathroom, she had told Song Yi to meet her in a dream that night so they could talk.
Sure enough, in her dream, Song Yi stood by her bed, watching as Guan Xiaoxuan opened her eyes.
Looking around and seeing Song Yi, Guan Xiaoxuan realized she was dreaming. With someone watching her in the real world, this dream was the only safe space left to talk.
“Song Yi.” Guan Xiaoxuan sat up in bed and said, “Can you tell who’s watching us?”
Song Yi nodded and said, [Across… the street…]
Across the street?
Guan Xiaoxuan frowned. “You mean Xing Tianqing?”
Song Yi neither nodded nor shook her head. She simply said, [There’s… another person being watched…]
“Someone else?” Guan Xiaoxuan asked, confused. “Who else is under surveillance?”
Just then, there was a knock at the door.
Only one person knocked politely in her dreams—the assistant of Jin Cheng.
She walked to the living room, and sure enough, the man in the suit walked in, polite as ever. “Good evening, Miss Guan.”
“What are you doing here?” Guan Xiaoxuan asked. “Didn’t we agree not to contact each other unless necessary?”
“If I’m here, it means it’s necessary,” the man said, glancing at Song Yi beside her. “I assume you’ve already noticed—you’re being monitored.”
“We?” Guan Xiaoxuan repeated the word, starting to realize something. She sat on the sofa and crossed her legs. “You mean your boss is also being watched?”
“Yes,” the man replied without hesitation. “Both his company and his home have been bugged. The people behind it are from the Bureau of the Strange.”
“So it really is them.” Guan Xiaoxuan felt something wasn’t right and looked up at the man. “What does your boss want to tell me?”
“He said to be careful,” the man said calmly. “He hopes you make it out of this safely.”
Guan Xiaoxuan went quiet for a long moment, staring hard at the man in front of her.
“Jin Cheng knew from the start that I’d be dragged into this, didn’t he?”
“Yes and no.”
The man looked at her without emotion, as if stating a simple fact.
“There’s always a price to pay for a new life,” he said. “Mr. Jin is watching your progress. If you survive this, there’s a chance for deeper cooperation between you.”
Guan Xiaoxuan frowned, but before she could speak, she saw the man shift his gaze to Song Yi, eyeing her curiously.
“Your spirit still can’t speak properly,” he said. “And her abilities seem quite limited.”
Song Yi was clearly upset after being insulted for no reason and bared her teeth angrily at the man.
Guan Xiaoxuan tried to calm her down, looked the man up and down, and asked, “Do you have any way to help her improve?”
The man glanced at Guan Xiaoxuan thoughtfully and said, “As for that kind of knowledge, it would be better to ask the master about it once you’ve safely made it through this ordeal.”
“But what I can tell you is—this ghost will become very powerful,” he added with a slight smile. “Everything will be answered in time.”
Guan Xiaoxuan pouted. “You and your boss talk the same—always so cryptic.”
The man didn’t seem bothered. He gave her a polite bow, then turned and left.
After he was completely gone, Guan Xiaoxuan sat back down on the sofa. She stared at the empty coffee table in front of her and suddenly said to Song Yi, “Now that we know who’s been watching us, should we go take a look?”
Song Yi turned to her and, standing beside her, replied: “We can…”
Guan Xiaoxuan looked at her with interest. “Got any good ideas?”
Song Yi lowered her eyes and said: “Invisibility…”
Invisibility?
Guan Xiaoxuan’s eyes lit up. She suddenly remembered how, when Song Yi was hunting her down, her own presence had started to fade more and more each day. At the time, she’d even thought, If only I had that ability too. She never imagined it might actually be possible!
“What do I need to do?”
Her question made Song Yi pause for a bit, as if she were struggling to gather her thoughts. After a while, she slowly began to explain the principle behind the invisibility.
Based on Guan Xiaoxuan’s own experience, the first four days had gone like this:
On the first day, almost nothing happened. The real changes began on the second day.
By the second day, people wouldn’t notice her unless they were looking directly at her when she spoke.
By the third day, it got worse. Guan Xiaoxuan had started to become partially invisible—if she didn’t physically touch someone, they wouldn’t even sense she was there.
By the fourth day, she was basically invisible. No one could see or hear her, even if she spoke or touched them. People could only notice her presence through text messages or photos.
That was everything Guan Xiaoxuan had experienced. After that, Song Yi had been defeated by Jin Cheng and the others, so Guan Xiaoxuan never reached the later stages.
As Song Yi described everything, Guan Xiaoxuan felt a chill down her spine—and couldn’t help but feel grateful that Jin Cheng had saved her back then.