Longing for Love (Twice Reborn) - Chapter 14
He smiled.
Juchen seized the moment, speaking softly, “Your Highness, are you still upset?”
Song Mi lowered his gaze to her, then glanced at the delicate pastries. “So, you made these just to cheer me up?”
Their eyes met. Staring into his deep, keen gaze, Juchen curled her toes inside her shoes and stockings.
She quickly turned her head away, coughing lightly to hide the blush rising to her cheeks. “Of course I want you to be happy. That way, you and Her Majesty can reconcile.”
The man behind her fell silent for a brief moment before his voice deepened with amusement. “You haven’t even started your official duties, yet you’ve already learned how to flatter your superiors? You really have the makings of a court official.”
Juchen turned back, straightening her posture. “Is that so wrong?”
The corner of Song Mi’s lips quirked up. “Then what do you want from me?”
She hadn’t actually thought of asking anything, but now that the words were out, Juchen pondered for a moment before suggesting he copy a collection of poems for Her Majesty.
“That way, I can bring them to her tomorrow and read them aloud.”
Song Mi let out an almost imperceptible scoff.
In the end, he still allowed himself to be pulled to the writing desk and sat down.
Eagerly, Juchen spread out the paper, ground the ink, and presented the brush to him at eye level. The moment he took it, she turned to leave, not wanting to disturb his peace.
Song Mi spoke softly, “Come back.”
Juchen paused mid-step and hurried back to his side, her bright eyes sparkling as she whispered, “Does Your Highness have further instructions?”
Song Mi met her gaze. “I’m doing this for you. Shouldn’t there be some reward?”
Juchen froze. Song Mi pointed at the pastries she had placed on the table.
“Bring them here. I want to eat.”
A faint smile touched her lips as she glided gracefully to the table.
Pressing the back of her hand against the porcelain plate, she frowned slightly. “They’ve gone cold. Let me warm them up.”
When she returned from outside, the lacquered tray now also held a pot of fragrant floral tea, specially brewed for him.
His appreciation for her thoughtfulness was evident.
Juchen clasped her slender, jade like fingers together, watching nervously as he took a bite and gave her an approving look.
The weight in her chest lifted, and her lips curved into a smile though it faded before reaching her ears.
Suddenly, she remembered her past life. In the final days of the Dowager Empress’s life, for reasons unknown, Her Majesty had frequently taken her into the kitchen, making these same pastries over and over in front of her.
Juchen had never been skilled in the kitchen, but after watching so many times, she had learned by sheer repetition.
Looking back now, how could someone as wise as Her Majesty have wasted so much time on something so seemingly meaningless?
Perhaps… she had wanted her to learn.
Back then, the relationship between the Dowager Empress and Prince Pengshan had reached an icy standstill after the execution of the Lu father and son, and Lu Feng’s exile to the far reaches of the empire.
Song Mi had submitted his resignation to the court, turned his back on the capital, and journeyed westward all the way to Rome never to return.
He hadn’t even been there to see Her Majesty one last time before her passing.
A memory flashed before Juchen’s eyes Song Mi standing before the Empress’s tomb in her previous life, his desolate and lonely figure. Her heart clenched as if gripped by an invisible hand.
She should have made these pastries for him back then.
Yet how oblivious she had been back then, failing to grasp the Empress Dowager’s intentions, let alone discerning his feelings.
Song Mi took a sip of tea and noticed her distraction. “What’s on your mind?” she asked.
Juchen gave an almost imperceptible sniff and shook her head. “Is it tasty?”
“Mmm.” Song Mi nodded, the corners of her lips curling slightly as she frowned. “Does this mean every time I quarrel with her from now on, you’ll make this for me?”
His eyes shimmered with gentle amusement, the curve of his lips carrying a teasing implication that he might deliberately pick fights with the Empress Dowager whenever he pleased.
Juchen hastily replied, “You don’t need to quarrel with Her Majesty. I can make it for you anytime you want.”
Song Mi arched a brow. “Anytime I want?”
A faint blush swept across Juchen’s cheeks like rouge. She cleared her throat. “What I meant was….”
Song Mi cut her off decisively. “Good. It’s settled then.”
During this leisurely retreat at Mount Li, the Empress Dowager summoned them daily.
That noon, it was Li Juchen’s turn to read aloud in the main palace hall for Her Majesty.
Juchen opened the poetry collection, cleared her throat, and a clear, melodious voice began resonating behind the beaded curtains, lingering like an echo.
The Empress Dowager watched her with serene warmth until she finished, then remarked with a faint smile, “Most young ladies these days prefer reciting ambitious, uplifting verses. Yet you chose such pastoral, idyllic poetry?”
Juchen coughed lightly and replied softly, “I inquired with former classmates beforehand and found they all selected famous lines. Worried Your Majesty might tire of them, I thought to offer something different.”
The Empress Dowager chuckled. “It does carry a unique charm.”
Encouraged by her mild expression, Juchen gathered courage and handed over the collection. “Would Your Majesty care to look?”
With slender fingers, the Empress Dowager accepted it. Upon turning the first page, her fingertips abruptly stilled. She traced the familiar handwriting from top to bottom before lifting her gaze to the girl before her.
“Where did this collection come from?”
After a pause, Juchen answered gently, “Lu Yun gave it to me.”
This was undoubtedly implying that Lu Feng had persuaded Song Mi, attributing the credit to his closest friend.
Not that Juchen disliked claiming merit but given her current… unseemly rapport with Prince Pengshan, she dared not let the Empress Dowager notice.
After all, she was his mother.
Yet the Empress Dowager remained skeptical. Lu Feng was a carefree, straightforward soul hardly capable of coaxing Song Mi into extending an olive branch. Her son’s temperament, while amiable at times, could be remarkably stubborn.
Juchen countered mildly, “Perhaps persuasion requires no particular skill.
People naturally heed what they wish to hear.”
The Empress Dowager smiled. “Are you suggesting he wanted to reconcile with me?”
“Not reconcile make peace.”
The Empress Dowager pondered this, regarding her kindly. Juchen hesitated briefly before continuing, “This subject merely believes that if it were mere reconciliation, there would have been no quarrel initially. Reconciliation stems from calculated interest. His Highness possesses both literary grace to govern and martial prowess to secure the realm hardly one to overlook interests.”
With a faint smile, the Empress Dowager said, “You mean his disputes with me, though against his interests, at least came from sincerity.”
“Only those who care will quarrel. Indifference extinguishes even the will to argue.”
“Extinguishes the will?”
“This humble official believes so. If it’s a foolish opinion, please don’t laugh, Your Highness.”
The Empress Dowager only smiled more deeply at this. After her laughter subsided, a distant look came into her eyes as if recalling something. She slowly closed the poetry collection, placed it on her lap, gently stroked it, and sighed softly: “Children are debts indeed.”
After a moment of silence, Her Majesty accepted the poetry collection and ordered Chief Pei to retrieve the prized Shezhou inkstone from the royal treasury at Mount Li the very one Song Mi had long desired and deliver it to him.
Chief Pei bowed in acknowledgment of the decree when the Empress Dowager suddenly turned her gaze to Juchen.
“Take her along as well,” Her Majesty added, smiling faintly at Juchen. “I liked what you said. As a reward, you may choose any one item you wish.”
Juchen was nearly overwhelmed by the unexpected favor, kowtowing in gratitude.
Following Chief Pei into the treasury, she stood before the dazzling array of rare treasures, lost in thought for a long while. In the end, she selected a bolt of fabric perfectly suited for making an outer robe.
Holding the fabric in her hands, Juchen’s mind was already occupied with how to tailor it into a fine cloak.
For it would not be long before he would depart for the disaster relief mission in Shangdu.
—
On their last day before descending the mountain, Juchen joined the other female disciples in making a pilgrimage to the Three Life Stone in the red maple grove of the back mountain to offer prayers and make wishes.
As Lu Yun optimistically put it, though they could not marry on schedule, there was no harm in yearning for a beautiful fate. After all, hadn’t many male officials at court also had their fair share of romantic companions?
“A fleeting romance is all the more enticing,” Lu Yun whispered to them with a suggestive lift of her brow.
The female disciples covered their mouths in giggles, too inexperienced to do more than take it as a jest. Only Juchen, who had already experienced such matters, bit her lower lip, feeling like a shameless rogue, her face flushing with embarrassment.
Lu Feng, ever one for joining in the fun, heard that the Three Life Temple in the maple grove offered divination slips each bearing the stone’s first impression of the petitioner, said to be both accurate and amusing. Seeing Lu Yun leading a group of young women toward the grove, he rallied a crowd of talented young men and dragged Song Mi along as well.
They traversed the winding path until they reached the heart of the dense forest.
Maple leaves blanketed the ground, mingling with patches of lingering snow a striking contrast of red and white that painted an extraordinarily beautiful scene.
Amidst it all stood the Three Life Stone, its surface draped with crimson threads, awaiting their prayers.
Following the other disciples’ example, Juchen tied a carefully woven love knot to the branches of an ancient maple beside the stone, then pressed her palms together and bowed deeply.
Not far off, in front of the Three Life Temple, a burst of boisterous laughter suddenly erupted from a group of young men.
“Good heavens! The stone’s impression of Brother Lu is actually ‘fool’! Hahaha…”
“Let me see yours! Tsk, yours says ‘bookworm fool.’ And you dare laugh at me?”
“At least mine has ‘book’ in it. Yours is just pure fool.”
“Shut up! I’m clearly a dashing romantic. This isn’t fun, not accurate at all.”
Amid the uproarious laughter, someone suddenly called out to Song Mi: “Your Highness, what does yours say?”
“Eh? ‘Old acquaintance’?”
“Zhengzhi, you’ve been here before?”
“Come on, this is Mount Li the imperial family comes and goes as they please.
Even if His Highness just passed by once, it counts as having been here.”
Lu Feng protested indignantly, “Hey, I’ve passed by too! How come it doesn’t remember me?”
“Well, you know how it is…”
Another round of raucous laughter followed.
Song Mi stood to the side, a faint smile playing at the corners of his lips as he watched them banter and laugh. Seeming to sense something, he suddenly turned his head.
Juchen quickly averted her gaze, lowering her head slightly, but her heart was pounding wildly.
Had he been here before? What kind of visit had it been just passing by, or had he made a wish?
Had he, too, once hoped for a beautiful romance?
Lu Yun took a couple of steps toward the exit, then glanced back and saw Juchen still had not followed. She quickly waved her over.
“Coming,” Juchen said, quickening her pace to walk side by side with Lu Yun as they left.
Song Mi watched her fluttering figure for a long time, until everyone had dispersed from around the Stone of Three Lives. He reached out and placed his hand atop the stone’s surface.
The man’s lips curled slightly as he spoke in a low voice, “Though I don’t remember what I asked of you, since you recall my past visit, you should remember my wish. I never beg lightly if I entrusted something to you, it must have been something I truly desired. So, whatever it was, if I end up with any regrets in this life… don’t blame me for taking a blade to you.”
The Stone of Three Lives: “……”