My New Love That Isn’t Fated - Episode 34

They read through a few more pages of the diary together.

“Father was furious. Serves him right. I avenged Mother. Lindel, I did it!”
“Well done, Lady Ayril. But please don’t push yourself too hard. Lindel isn’t there by your side anymore.”
“It’s lonely, only being able to talk through a diary. I want Lindel to be here with me. The castle feels so suffocating. Everyone hates me. — delivers this diary back and forth, but I really just want to talk to you. They call you a witch like it’s a terrible thing. You were my dear teacher.”

They seemed to exchange diary entries about once a week.
It looked like the princess and the witch were living apart.
Lindel had originally been Ayril’s tutor, but had been exiled from the castle for some reason.
The word “witch” wasn’t used in a friendly way—it was a cruel label thrown at her after she’d been cast out.

“Lindel tried to protect me. After my mother died from the sorrow of my father’s affairs, I was left all alone in the castle. I could stay strong because you were there for me. But even though you did nothing wrong, everyone spoke ill of you.”
“Just knowing that you still believe in me is enough, Lady Ayril. My sweet Ayril. Please always keep smiling. Just thinking of your long black hair and red eyes brings me happiness, no matter where I am.”

There was a closeness between the witch and the princess that went beyond just a tutor-student relationship.
If anything, they felt more like sisters.
The princess’s mother had been the queen, but her husband—the king—was known to be a womanizer, always chasing after other women.
Aside from his concubines, he also had multiple maids he’d seduced, and always kept his current favorite by his side.
Once the queen became pregnant with Ayril, the king had completely lost interest in her.

The queen passed away when Ayril was five.
From that time on, Lindel stayed close and served as her teacher.
Back then, people called her “Wise Lady Lindel” because of her intelligence—that much could be gathered from the diary.

“People don’t really change, do they?” Owen said. “Whether in the past or now, we all struggle with the same things. Knowing whose bl00d runs in your veins can be… tiring. It used to be, anyway.”
“I feel the same,” Lilia replied. “I once told you, didn’t I? That I’m like my mother—that I wasn’t blessed with a good family.”
“Yeah, I remember.”

They took quite a long time to get through the pages, since they had to discuss and puzzle out many of the unfamiliar words and phrases together.
It was already past midnight. Time to sleep.
Lilia made a second cup of coffee.
The sound of the rain outside filled the room like soft music.

They were sitting close together—naturally, since they were reading the same book.
At first, Lilia had tried not to think about how their arms or legs sometimes brushed.
But eventually, she was so absorbed in reading that she forgot all about it.

“Still… no matter what bl00d we carry, we get to choose how we live,” Owen said.
“Yes. The princess in this diary feels so alive. Even her anger feels full of energy, like she’s burning with life… It’s making me remember something I had forgotten.”
“Like the will to fight?”
“Exactly. I tried not to think about it—anything unpleasant or scary. My father was cold to me. If I talked back, he’d yell or hit me. Elad was the same. So I stayed obedient, no matter what anyone did or said to me.”

She should’ve fought back more.
She should’ve left home instead of listening to her father.
She should’ve chosen work over marrying Elad.

“I want to be like that princess—honest with my own feelings.”
“The princess had Lindel. She wasn’t alone. That’s probably why she could stand up for herself.”
“Yes, I think so too. Ever since you reached out to me, Owen, I feel like my world has changed. Thanks to you, it feels like I can start a new life.”
“You were already searching for a new life before you met me. You’ve fought hard. You’ve done more than enough.”

Owen smiled faintly as their eyes met.
Lilia’s cheeks flushed.

“Thank you, Owen.”
“Likewise. I couldn’t have deciphered half of this on my own. You really helped.”
“It’s fun learning about people from ancient times. I can see why you’re so drawn to history.”
“Lilia… you take the bed. I’ll sleep on the sofa. Let’s get some rest.”

Owen said he’d take her to the library again tomorrow.
Lilia tried to insist, but he wouldn’t hear of letting a woman sleep on the couch.

“I’ll leave the door slightly open. I’ll be just out here. If anything happens, don’t hesitate to call.”
“The door…”
“You’re still scared, aren’t you? I didn’t notice. Sorry.”
“N-no, I’m an adult. I’m not afraid of anything.”
“Lilia. There’s no shame in fear. You’re allowed to say something scares you.”
“…Thank you.”

Even though she hadn’t said a word, how did he know?

Lilia’s eyes welled up.
She was grateful for Owen’s kindness—and that made her painfully aware of how drawn to him she was becoming.
Even though her divorce with Elad wasn’t final yet.

These feelings… I have to keep them hidden.
If I don’t, I really will become just like my mother.