Reasonable Loss - 16

“I can’t promise that.”

“Then no.”

Eunsu clamped his mouth shut and tried to pry Dokwon’s hand away. But Dokwon’s hand didn’t budge. Instead, it slyly slipped under the hem of Eunsu’s clothes.

“Don’t act so standoffish. We had s3x, right? And you even got knocked up by me.”

Eunsu’s body stiffened rigidly. He had no idea why Dokwon was suddenly acting like this. When had he treated his scent like a disgusting stench? Not to mention dragging him here to clear out his traces because he hated them.

Is this fun? Is he toying with me?

Eunsu let out a long sigh and murmured in a voice just barely audible.

“……It’s because I don’t like it.”

“What? I can’t hear you.”

“It’s because I don’t like you getting hurt.”

“……”

“It’s sad that you find my scent re……volting, but it’s even sadder if you get sick.”

At that calm voice, Dokwon’s hand, which had been wandering low on Eunsu’s stomach, stopped abruptly. Then he pulled it out quickly. The breath brushing his nape vanished too. But his hand still blocked the door. Eunsu tugged at his sleeve and moved that hand away.

“Now let’s tidy the bedroom.”

With that, he left the bathroom as if nothing had happened.

The bedroom was the place in this house where Eunsu had stayed the longest and most often. As such, the traces there would be plentiful too.

Eunsu first rummaged through the drawer by the bed. But everything in there was…… stuff like that. Why, condoms or gel, things like that. Things Eunsu and Dokwon had used almost daily. Or several times in a single night, even.

Eunsu hesitated for a moment. Was this his trace too? Dokwon had bought it, though. Eunsu glanced at Dokwon. Dokwon was leaning against the wall, his face twisted in deep displeasure. Something else must have bothered him.

With pursed lips, Eunsu closed the drawer without taking anything. Then, after looking around, he headed toward the dressing room to grab a few pieces of underwear and clothes.

At that moment, Dokwon blocked his path.

“This is enough, so just go.”

“……Pardon?”

“Just…… go.”

Eunsu jutted his chin forward. One moment this, the next that—what was he supposed to do? He had never seen him as indecisive before. Was this thirty-year-old man always so unpredictable?

But Dokwon was in his own bind. The moment Eunsu entered the bedroom—no, precisely when he saw Eunsu in his bedroom—a massive headache crashed over him. It felt like a drill boring into his temples, the kind of pain you might experience if that happened.

‘Dokwon. Good night.’

‘Loosen your arm a bit. Can’t breathe……’

‘Ah…… Let me sleep a little more. Just a little…… okay?’

‘I’m hungry. What should we have for breakfast?’

‘Ah…… Dokwon, ugh, stop there……’

Fragments of memories burst sporadically, making his eyes sting. At the same time, Eunsu’s scent, which had felt manageable even in the bathroom, now stabbed into his brain like needles. It was like someone hammering his nose bridge.

“Just…… go for a bit.”

Dokwon said in a suppressed voice, hand pressed to his forehead. Realizing something was wrong from his appearance, Eunsu lightly gripped Dokwon’s elbow.

“Does it hurt again? Your head? Should we go to the hospital?”

“No…… it’s fine.”

Dokwon irritably swatted Eunsu’s hand away. Then he glared at him with eyes laced with pain.

“If you just disappear from my sight, it’ll be fine. So get out.”

At those words, Eunsu pressed his lips tight at the corners. He knew Dokwon wasn’t saying it because he hated him. If the headache was bad enough to make him delirious, the pain must be immense.

But understanding and getting hurt were entirely different matters.

Eunsu’s eyelashes fluttered in a tremor. He wanted to ask, Why does it hurt so much because of me? But Dokwon’s condition was too serious for that.

If he whined about being hurt and demanded attention pathetically, Dokwon might end up in the hospital again. Once a day was shocking enough; he couldn’t make him ride in an ambulance twice.

Eunsu spun on his heel and left the bedroom. Then, as if chased by something, he headed to the entrance. The box full of stuff was heavy, but he had no time to fuss over it. He found his sneakers and shoved his feet in hastily before leaving Dokwon’s house.

Not content with that, he took the elevator down and out of the apartment building before he could stop.

Eunsu plopped down on a bench. He dropped the heavy box to the ground like discarding it. It felt exactly like being chased out of the house. It was ridiculous.

Eunsu breathed in the cold air to steady his breathing. Dokwon getting sick because of him wasn’t a one- or two-time thing, yet he still couldn’t get used to it. With treatment as an obstacle ahead, he might not even see him often, and his throat burned with bitterness.

How long had he sat on that dim bench? A chilly wind whipped his body. The weather, just entering spring, was still harsh. Especially in the night past midnight. White breath puffed from between his lips.

Eunsu picked up the box and stood. Then, heading out to the main road without much thought, he remembered.

He couldn’t drive.

Staring blankly at the occasional passing cars, a hollow laugh escaped him.

Eunsu set the box down again and pulled out his phone. One a.m. Of course, no subway. He’d have to take a taxi, but he had no confidence left for another ride today. He had already taken two. One more, and he’d end up in the hospital instead of Dokwon.

For now, Eunsu searched for motels and hotels. But this was a high-end apartment complex area, so there were none. Even if there were, it was a thirty-minute walk.

Thirty minutes. The thought of wandering cold night streets with this box made his stomach churn.

Then, a good idea flashed.

The company. The company was a fifteen-minute walk away.

* * *

By the time Eunsu arrived at the company, his hair was damp with sweat. Carrying the box while walking hadn’t been easy. He had even set it down at bus stops or flower beds midway to rest, yet he was still exhausted.

And from the moment he entered the company, his body cooled rapidly. As the sweat dried, chills set in. Eunsu crossed the lobby, his teeth chattering.

“Uh, Team Leader Yoo?”

The security guard he knew greeted him with a surprised face. Eunsu smiled awkwardly and,

“I left something behind.”

answered a question that wasn’t asked. And in case he might say more, he jabbed the elevator button repeatedly, press press press. The elevator from the upper floors began descending.

First, stop by the fourteenth floor to drop off the stuff, wash his face quickly. Then stay by the portable heater, and when early dawn came, take the subway home, and after that, come back to work.

Eunsu planned as he watched the approaching elevator. Soon, ding, the alarm sounded, and the doors opened. Eunsu stepped in without checking inside. But the box bumped against the wall with a thud. The wall seemed closer somehow. Had the elevator jerked?

Eunsu tilted his head curiously and lifted his gaze forward. And then,

“Uh……”

“……Uh.”

he ran into an unexpected person.

“Executive Director, no, Managing Director?”

“Eunsu?”

It was Seongheon. The managing director of Seongjin and Dokwon’s cousin. That alone made them quite close, but he had a deeper connection with Eunsu for other reasons.

He had first met him when Eunsu came for a job interview. Unlike the seasoned, strict-looking interviewers, he had a gentle impression and a handsome smile.

Relieved by his disarming appearance, but he had asked only sharp, piercing questions, leaving a vivid mark in his mind.

Then, after joining the company, he met him by chance again. Seongheon had been a director then, yet he ate at the company cafeteria with such a rank. Just as Eunsu thought he was an amazing person, Seongheon greeted him first. He said the interview left an impression. He remembered. Congratulations on joining.

He was a good person. They met occasionally after that.

There weren’t any real feelings exchanged, so to speak. More like a mentor or senior colleague. Besides, he was an omega, and Seongheon was a beta. Of course, there was no rule against omegas and betas getting together, but anyway, it wasn’t like that with Seongheon.

They had meals together, drank coffee, and consulted and learned about work, the company, relationships, social life, and more.

He always gave good answers, and thanks to them, Eunsu became a team leader at a young age.

Seongheon was a good boss and a cool friend.

But after getting together with Dokwon somehow, they hadn’t been in touch. They hadn’t met often before either, but still, once or twice a month.

Ah, right. Around when he had just started dating Dokwon, Seongheon had gone on a nearly two-year business trip to an overseas branch. He had vaguely heard he was back. Who knew they’d meet like this.

Eunsu unwittingly stepped back. Meeting after so long in such a state was utterly embarrassing.