Smoke and Fire [GL] - Chapter 16

The days away from the Shen family were not easy.

Little Rong’er was young and didn’t understand separation. She only knew that she had somehow left the familiar courtyard with her elder sister. Her mother held her, incoherent, and her nanny covered her face and would not look at her anymore. Everyone was crying.

Concubines were not allowed to wear true red. On the day she was married into the Li residence, Shen Ning An sat in front of the mirror wearing a peach-red skirt.

“Sister, you are so pretty today.” Little Rong’er ate wedding candies she picked up from the floor, gazing curiously at her elder sister.

Shen Ning An was silent for a long moment before she said softly, “You should go back to sleep now, be a good girl.”

From Little Rong’er’s perspective, a tear was slipping from her half-lowered eye.

“Don’t, don’t cry, Sister.” A small, tender hand reached out, clumsily wiping her cheek. “Mother said, w-we will have a good life later… Don’t be sad anymore.”

A flicker of tears shimmered in Shen Ning An’s eyes. She was smiling, but it looked so heartbreakingly sad.

“I’m sorry, Little Rong’er,” she said. “I’m sorry.”

It is better to be a wife in a small family than a concubine in a powerful one. Although Shen Ning An became a concubine, she was a virtuous woman who adhered to the three obediences and four virtues. Yet, this Young Master Li preferred wild flowers by the roadside and was not interested in a proper concubine like her. He quickly grew tired of her.

The Li family servants judged people harshly. Knowing that Shen Ning An had been cast out by her father and was not favored, they treated her with cold words every day.

And Little Rong’er, as a dowry maid brought by a concubine, was naturally even more dependent on others.

“Shen Ning Rong, hurry up and get over here to sweep the snow clean!”

“The low-born girl abandoned by her parents.”

“Someone like you, eating our Li family’s food and living in our Li family’s house, what right do you have to put on airs?”

“Get lost! You make me sick just looking at you!”

Luo Yao witnessed scene after scene of Little Rong’er’s memories, most of which were fragmented and bleak. The scenes only became clear again when Little Rong’er turned nine.

That year, Shen Ning An became pregnant.

The Li residence indulged in extravagant living. Old Master Li had three wives and four concubines, and his son was even worse. Shen Ning An was merely a girl casually given to Young Master Li by her father. There were at least a dozen other girls with the same status, not counting those short-lived relationships with actresses or courtesans.

In a family overflowing with illegitimate children, pregnancy was not a major event. But for Shen Ning An and Little Rong’er, it was different—it meant that, at least until the child was born, the servants could not continue to bully them.

Days passed, and Shen Ning An’s belly gradually swelled. Young Master Li finally remembered the Shen family girl he had long neglected and would visit four or five times a month.

However, this frequency was a potential threat in the eyes of others.

One day, a woman named Qiushui came to see Shen Ning An, and the maid next to her presented a pot of grape wine.

“Sister, this is wine tribute from the Western Regions,” she smiled enchantingly, pushing the wine pot forward. “The Young Master gave me a jar, so I thought I would bring it over for you to try, Sister.”

Qiushui was Young Master Li’s most favored side-concubine, and Shen Ning An dared not disobey. She only said, “I am still pregnant, so it is inconvenient for me to drink, Madam should…”

“Oh,” Qiushui lifted her gaze lightly, interrupting her. “Just a little bit. Are you saying you want me to have made this trip for nothing?”

Shen Ning An lowered her eyes for a long time, then whispered, “I understand.”

She lowered her head and poured herself a cup of wine. Just as she was about to drink it, Little Rong’er’s perspective moved, and with a smack, she slapped the cup away. The dark red wine spilled all over the table.

“Why are you being such a bully?! My sister said she won’t drink it. Why are you so insistent? Did you perhaps put something in the wine?!”

The wine also splashed onto Qiushui’s luxurious dress. Hearing this only made things worse. She stood up and slapped Little Rong’er across the face.

“What are you, a mere thing, to dare shout at me?!” She sneered, grabbing Little Rong’er’s collar. “I’ll report you two to the Young Master later. Pregnant or not, you’ll have to pack up and get out! Lowly bones, still thinking about crawling into the Young Master’s bed later. You little slut.”

Hearing the last sentence, Little Rong’er’s hand covering her face froze slightly.

“What did you say?”

Qiushui realized she had misspoke and opened her mouth but said nothing.

But Little Rong’er grabbed her shoulder: “What did you say? Say it again!!”

Shen Ning An also stood up at this moment, covering her belly with her right hand, nervously watching the two: “Rong’er, stop talking!”

Little Rong’er was enraged to the extreme and couldn’t hear her sister at all. She had lived a dependent life for five or six years, seeing Young Master Li’s daily debauchery and pleasure-seeking. Qiushui’s words stung her more deeply than the dirtiest insults in the world.

She desperately clutched the collar of the woman in front of her, completely ignoring the startled cries of the maids around them. Qiushui was a traditionally delicate beauty, no match for someone who did hard labor every day. She cried out in alarm: “You… What part of what I said is wrong? The Young Master is letting you stay in the Li family only because he thinks you are pretty enough to be taken as a concubine in a couple of years… Otherwise, who would let you eat and drink for free until now?!”

“Take me as a concubine…” Little Rong’er was shaking with anger, as if deeply disgusted. “Bah! You are not worthy!!”

With that, she wrestled with Qiushui.

The “wrestling” here was a one-sided attack, with her scratching Qiushui’s charming face, leaving streaks of red marks. Qiushui screamed heartbreakingly. The maids pulled and tugged at them. Seeing that Little Rong’er completely ignored her, the color drained from Shen Ning An’s face.

“…”

She knew that if Qiushui went back to cause trouble, she would likely not escape blame.

It didn’t matter if something happened to her, but if something happened to Little Rong’er…

No one knew when Shen Ning An slipped and fell to the ground, as the scene was too chaotic. Finally, someone screamed in surprise. Little Rong’er glanced over in the panicked crowd, and instantly all her movements froze.

She unconsciously let go of Qiushui. Qiushui, seeing Shen Ning An’s appearance, panicked and quickly backed away, scared out of her wits: “It wasn’t me, you all saw, I didn’t hit her…”

Shen Ning An lay sideways on the ground, clutching her stomach in pain. Dark red bl00d surged out from under her skirt.

“Call a doctor!!!”

Little Rong’er screamed at everyone hysterically.

A quarter of an hour later, the doctor arrived. He took her pulse through the bed curtain, shook his head at her, and said to quickly find a midwife—it was a premature birth.

Little Rong’er numbly agreed. After seeing the doctor out, another quarter of an hour passed before the midwife arrived.

The midwife rushed in and immediately panicked. She hurriedly came out and told her that with so much bleeding, a successful birth was impossible. Even if the child survived, the mother wouldn’t!

Little Rong’er heard herself kneeling on the ground, saying: Forget the child, please save my sister’s life, please. Please.

Her mind was blank. She shoved the only bit of dowry she had brought from the Shen family into the midwife’s hands. The midwife looked at the silver in her hand, gritted her teeth, tossed out the phrase “I can’t guarantee the person will live,” and went back inside.

This entry lasted five hours.

The midwife never came out, but basins of bloody water were carried in and out by the maids, back and forth.

She stood at the door of the birthing room, not even changing her posture. She was afraid that if she left, her sister would be anxious if she woke up and didn’t see her first. Just like the time she fell asleep in the closet while playing hide-and-seek when she was little, and Shen Ning An found her and cried, saying, “Don’t ever make me worry like that again.”

Now, she wasn’t hiding. She wasn’t going anywhere. Her sister could see her the moment she opened her eyes. She wouldn’t let her sister worry.

She waited with almost desperate patience. Finally, as dawn was about to break, a very weak cry came from the birthing room, and then it fell silent.

Morning light crept through the window. The midwife, her hands covered in bl00d, slowly walked out and told her, “It’s no use.”

“What do you mean, it’s no use?” she heard her own hoarse voice, as she hadn’t had a single drop of water since yesterday.

“…The baby was born, but it was premature. It died right after coming out,” the midwife said, her voice trembling. “The girl… watching her son die in her arms, she passed away right then. Go in and see her. The two of you can see each other one last time…”

She no longer heard the rest of the words.

She slowly lifted the curtain and walked into the room, seeing Shen Ning An lying on the bl00d-soaked bed, her face transparently pale, seeming as if a touch would shatter her.

Seeing her arrive, Shen Ning An slightly turned her head, as if this simple motion cost her all her strength.

“Little Rong’er,” she called out.

“Sister,” she choked out. “This time I didn’t run around. I didn’t make you worry. Don’t go, alright?”

Shen Ning An smiled and shook her head.

“I’m sorry, Little Rong’er. I didn’t let you live a good life. In the next life, don’t be my sister again.”

The day Shen Ning An died, Young Master Li happened to be bringing a new girl into the residence from outside. The girl was spoiled and overbearing. Passing by, she asked about the death, felt that a corpse was unlucky, and wanted to throw away and burn everything Shen Ning An had used.

Young Master Li laughed, put his arm around her waist, and said, “My dear, anything but that. How can a person’s belongings be thrown away?”

“The Young Master is clearly sentimental over her and is trying to trick your concubine,” the girl pouted coquettishly, turning her face away to pretend to be wronged. This prompted Young Master Li to repeatedly apologize in soft tones. Finally, to win back his beauty’s smile, he said, “Why would I be sentimental? You are the only one in my heart, my dear. Go on, find someone to burn the things.”

The servants were about to step forward when they heard a faint voice: “Aren’t you afraid?”

Young Master Li turned his head, thought for a moment, and laughed: “Shen Ning Rong, is it? Tell me, what am I afraid of?”

“Afraid that my sister will come back for your life.”

“Your sister died helping our family spread its branches. I’ll have her buried in a good coffin,” he said, looking at her flirtatiously with a suggestive smile. “As for you, little beauty, you are much more interesting than your sister.”

Perhaps even he hadn’t expected it. The moment the words left his mouth, the seemingly frail little beauty slapped him across the face with a sharp crack.

“Thank you, Young Master. You are also more disgusting than I thought.” She smiled in return.

Everyone was stunned. Young Master Li, naturally, was furious, roaring for someone to kick her out.

Little Rong’er had long wanted to leave. She pushed away the servants, stating that she had feet and would walk out herself. She rushed into the room, gathered the relics Shen Ning An had left behind, and left the Li residence under the gaze of the crowd.

She was a girl, and so young. It seemed that surviving, except through illicit means, was a luxury. But for Shen Ning Rong, who had spent her life among powder and rouge, becoming a woman like Qiushui was worse than death.

Fortunately, an old actress who played elderly female roles took pity on the small, lonely girl and let her join the opera troupe. From then on, she trained hard in singing, reciting, acting, and martial arts.

In winter, after one performance, she happened to overhear a guest saying that the Shen father and son had climbed higher and higher, now serving as high-ranking officials in the capital, and would return for ancestor worship during the Lantern Festival.

At that time, a faint expectation stirred in her heart. It was as if she wouldn’t have to live a wandering life if only those distant family members were willing to take her in.

She dared not tell her master. So, on a snowy night, she left without saying goodbye and knocked on the door of the Shen residence.

“Who is it?” the servant inside asked.

“The Third Miss of the Shen family, Shen Ning Rong,” she said.

“Third Miss?” The voice inside became very confused. “Our Shen family has no Misses, only Young Masters. You must have the wrong place.”

She was silent for a long time.

“Could you please pass on a message?”

The servant seemed difficult, but agreed nonetheless.

Half an hour later, the servant returned. The doubt in his voice was gone, replaced by an official, cold tone: “The Old Master said that our Shen family has never had a Miss, and we do not know any Shen Ning Rong. You must either leave quickly, or we will have to call people to drive you away.”

Heavy snow fell from the eaves.

She did not leave. Instead, she leaned against the base of the wall, curled up into a ball, thinking that some harsh servants would chase people away without passing on the message, and she had probably just encountered one.

She would wait here for her mother and older brother to come out.

When the gloomy light of daybreak emerged from the snow clouds, the heavy gate of the Shen residence finally creaked open. She wanted to stand up, but having frozen all night, her entire body was stiff. She could only slowly crawl over.

Her hands were covered in blue and purple frostbite, and her face was likely the same, but Mother would definitely recognize her, she thought.

From a distance of more than ten meters, two servants wrapped in fur coats pressed her down into the snow: “Who are you!”

“I…” She choked on a mouthful of snow, struggling to raise her head. She saw her elder brother’s face against the light and couldn’t help but call out, “Brother… Brother!”

The young man lowered his eyes to look at her, saying nothing.

“Young Master, this little girl has been here since last night, claiming to be the Third Miss of our family,” a servant whispered in his ear. “How should we handle it?”

Look at me, Brother.

I am Little Rong’er.

The man in brocade clothes looked down at her, expressionless, and said faintly, “It is well known in the capital that no female was ever born into our Shen family.”

He glanced at the servant.

“She’s such an obvious little beggar. How should she be dealt with, you tell me?”

The servant immediately bowed: “Understood.”

The two servants immediately dragged her up roughly, ignoring her struggles. They grabbed her hair and pulled her back. When they reached a deserted corner of the wall, one of them slapped the back of her head, cursing: “You little slut, how dare you try to extort the Shen family? Miss? You have a worthless life. You think you’re a Miss? …”

She went from screaming loudly to crying and begging, and then gradually fell silent.

Across the heavy snow, she vaguely saw the young man helping a woman in luxurious robes holding a baby out of the main gate. The woman smiled and playfully scolded him, seemingly complaining that he wasn’t wearing an outer cloak. Then, a maid took the male infant from her arms, and the group got into a carriage, which rolled past her.

“Mother…”

Her voice was now as thin as a mosquito’s buzz.

Mother.

Turn back and look at me.

Just once.

Please.

But until the carriage disappeared at the end of the long street, no one heard her voice.

Separated by a curtain, on one side was a life nearing death, and on the other were noble and esteemed people. No one would remember her name. Even if she died right there on the street, her fate would be nothing more than being thrown into a mass grave.

That year, a massive snowstorm fell.

A small body was buried by the snowflakes, always clutching a small bundle containing the relics of her and her sister.