Souvenir - Chapter 6.7

When I entered, I found Suu lying facedown on my bed.

“Suu? Are you okay?”

She didn’t respond.

The atmosphere in the room felt heavy, thick with unspoken emotion.

I sat beside the bed and placed a hand on her shoulder.

Slowly, Suu turned to face me.

Her eyes were damp with unshed tears.

I was startled.

“Are you crying? What’s wrong…?”

“…Tommy, don’t you understand?”

Had she seen me kiss Kenny?

Or was it the fact that I had invited Kenny over without telling her?

Either way, it was clear that Kenny’s presence was the cause of this.

“Please… don’t ever say you want to make her my mom!”

My heart skipped a beat.

She had seen right through me.

I had introduced Kenny to her, hoping they would get along—and perhaps, in the back of my mind, as someone who might one day live with us.

But Suu had sensed my intentions immediately.

Her intuition never failed to impress me.

Watching her cry, desperately pleading with me, I felt a maddening affection for her.

And those eyes—those heartbreakingly beautiful eyes—held me captive.

I couldn’t say a word.

As she gazed at me, she slowly sat up, resting her head against my chest.

Then, softly, she pressed her lips against mine.

My heart nearly leapt out of my chest.

Her lips were small, warm, and impossibly soft.

It wasn’t just the sensation that overwhelmed me—it was the sheer shock of it.

I felt heat rise to my face, my ears turning red.

We had exchanged light kisses before, many times, as a casual show of affection.

But this was different.

My reaction was completely inappropriate.

Seeing my confusion, Suu let out a quiet, knowing laugh.

“I only want it to be the two of us, Tommy.”

Her voice was filled with urgency.

“One mother is enough. The only mother I need… is the one who’s already gone.”

In her emerald-green eyes, I saw both unwavering determination and a silent, buried fear.

I watched her quietly and let out a small chuckle deep in my throat.

“I understand how you feel.”

I ran my fingers lightly over the back of her hand.

“But Suu, the world changes. And what you want now… might not be the same as what you’ll want in the future.”

“…That won’t change.”

She blinked once, then glared at me fiercely.

She held my gaze, unwavering.

“That’s why I want it to be just the two of us. Please…”

The strength in her voice made me hesitate.

I couldn’t force a mother into her life if she rejected the idea so strongly.

She wasn’t asking for a replacement.

She was still in the process of accepting that the only mother she ever had was gone forever.

I thought back to my own childhood.

After my mother passed away, a new mother had suddenly entered my life.

She was nothing more than a stranger to me—an intruder.

I had resented her.

I couldn’t let Suu go through that same pain.

“I understand.”

I exhaled, as if releasing the lingering doubt in my chest.

“I just thought… maybe you needed a mother. But perhaps that was just my own selfishness.”

“I want to be the one you love the most.”

Her words came out as a quiet plea.

“Alright. I understand.”

I brushed a hand through her hair.

“Now, let’s go down and eat dinner together.”

“Yes… let’s.”

“But just for today, I want you to get along with Kenny—as a ‘friend.'”

“You have to keep your ‘promise,’ okay?”

“Okay.”

As we walked down the stairs hand in hand, we found Kenny waiting for us at the bottom, looking slightly concerned.

Suu put on her brightest smile and cheerfully announced, “I’m starving!”

I had to admit, her performance was nothing short of award-worthy.

After dinner, I drove Kenny home. She invited me inside, but my mind was too preoccupied with Suu. I told her I was tired and declined.

When I got back, Suu was already asleep.

I stood by her bedside, watching her peaceful face.

I was starting to realize just how overwhelming my feelings for her had become.

I could never be a father to her.

But that was fine.

Just a little longer.

Suu sat at her desk, absentmindedly turning a Rubik’s Cube in her hands, resting her elbow on the table with a slightly sullen expression.

You watched her quietly, a gentle smile playing on his lips.

“You don’t seem very cheerful today, Suu.”

“…It’s nothing.”

“Your expression says otherwise.”

“……”

“Did someone say something to you?”

“No.”

“Did someone… try to do something to you?”

For a brief moment, her hands froze.

Then, she gripped the Rubik’s Cube tightly.

You didn’t miss the reaction. Slowly, he reached up and touched his earlobe.

“Is it about someone important to you?”

Suu’s head snapped up, her emerald-green eyes widening in surprise.

But she quickly looked away, resuming her fiddling with the puzzle.

“…How did you know?”

“Your face gives you away.”

“……”

“You know, Suu, in my line of work, I’ve learned to read people’s emotions quite well.”

Silence filled the room.

You waited patiently.

Finally, Suu placed the Rubik’s Cube on the desk with deliberate slowness and whispered,

“…When Mama died, I was all alone.”

“……”

“I don’t even know who my real father is. And I always knew—Tommy isn’t really my dad.”

“But he still cared for you, didn’t he?”

“…Yeah. But… I was scared. Scared that one day, he’d leave me too, and I’d be alone again.”

Her hands clenched into small fists.

“That’s why… I hate the idea of Tommy loving someone else.”

“Why is that?”

“Because… if he gets married, I’ll become a burden to him.”

“That’s not true.”

“But I’m not really his daughter.”

For the first time, Suu looked directly at You.

Her gaze was firm.

“I don’t want to be his daughter. I want to be special to him.”

“……”

“I want to be his number one. Always.”

You let out a small, knowing smile.

As if everything had fallen into place.

Gently, he touched her small hand.

“I understand how you feel, Suu.”

“…?”

“When you rely on someone that much, the fear of losing them becomes unbearable.”

“……”

“But, Suu… feelings change.”

Her body stiffened.

“What’s ‘special’ to you now… might not always stay the same.”

Her hand twitched slightly.

“…I won’t change.”

Her voice was faint but unwavering.

You smiled softly, flicking the Rubik’s Cube with his finger.

“Who knows? Maybe if you change the rules, you’ll see something new.”

Suu bit her lip.

He watched her intently, as if carefully rearranging the pieces of her heart.

“Papa’s friend came over the other day.”

She finally started to speak her mind.

“She treated me like I was in the way.”

“She kissed him right in front of me! Like I wasn’t even there!”

“Suu, your father is just… an ordinary adult. I find that reassuring, actually.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, it’s normal for him to enjoy time with friends, isn’t it?”

“Even with me around?”

“Suu.”

“I really love Papa!”

Her hands clenched tightly, her eyes glistening with unshed tears.

Her desperation was overwhelming, almost suffocating.

“You always say that, but maybe… you’re just longing for a father’s love.”

“A father? I’ve never thought of him as my father. Not even once!”

“Do you really mean that?”

“Yes, I do! I love him with all my heart!”

“Then tell me—why do you need him so badly?”

Suu stared into the glass of water in front of her, the surface still rippling from when she had hastily placed it down.

Her lashes lowered, and a single tear slipped down her cheek.

“Because… I don’t want to be alone anymore.”

She set the glass down roughly and hugged her knees.

You finally understood.

Her greatest fear was loneliness.

She was terrified that if Tommy found someone else, she would once again be left behind.

And if that was the case… maybe it wasn’t Tommy specifically that she needed.

Maybe anyone who could fill the void of her loneliness would do.

You idly rubbed his right earlobe.

This was his moment.

His winning move.

“I won’t ever let you be alone.”

The person most surprised by those words wasn’t himself—it was Suu.

It had slipped out instinctively, and yet… the way she reacted, the way it resonated with her, was undeniable.

“You’re only saying that because it’s your job to.”

“That’s not true. I care about your happiness more than anything.”

Suu suddenly burst into laughter.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing… it’s just that you sound exactly like ‘Papa’ when you talk.”

“Do I?”

“Yeah. The way you pause before you speak, the calm tone in your voice—it’s all just like him.”

“…I say these things because I mean them, Suu.”

She laughed again.

“It’s really uncanny! I thought so from the moment we met.”

“Should I dress up as your dad for Halloween?”

“I’d probably get confused about which one’s the real Papa!”

Her mood had done a complete 180.

You chuckled to himself.

He was just a counselor.

But could a counselor ever become something more?

They had only known each other for a little over a year.

Yet he was sure of it.

He had a talent for making people fall for him.

Rubbing his earlobe a little harder, he thought—

You’re already drawn to me, aren’t you?

“So… you’re just saying those things to reassure me, aren’t you?”

“Am I? If you don’t believe me, we can keep talking about it until you do.”

He sat beside her, gently placing his hand over hers.

She didn’t pull away.

Her fingers were slightly warm.

“How do we find happiness?”

She whispered the question, her voice fragile.

You swallowed.

And for the first time, he truly acknowledged the desires stirring within him.

I had a dream.

I wanted a place in this world that I could control.

A place built on my rules, where the people and environment existed solely under my command.

To some, it might sound impossible.

But I have never, not once in my life, believed in the concept of “impossible.”

And because I believed it, I knew it could be done.

That’s how I had always lived.

Then, I met Dr. Wang, and within his research, I saw the embodiment of my ideals.

But I had no intention of stopping at merely being his subordinate.

My true goal was to create a world of my own—one where I reigned supreme.

So, I feigned interest in his research, carefully observing from the inside, all while laying the groundwork for my own utopia.

Quietly, methodically, I had already begun to move.