Spring Remains the Same - Chapter 107

The Start of Autumn had passed, and a chill was gradually setting in.

After the evening meal, the sky had not yet grown completely dark. Wei Xiu sat in her wheelchair, her head turned to look out the window. The view outside was no longer a lush green. The vibrant verdure had faded at some unknown time, with tufts of withered yellow emerging. One could imagine that soon, all the green in the garden would recede, transforming into a bare, dilapidated, and broken scene.

The autumn harvest was approaching. This year had seen favorable winds and timely rain, which should alleviate the disasters of the past two years. Wei Xiu thought aimlessly. Since when had she started paying special attention to these things she never used to care about?

Puyang sat a step away from her. Wei Xiu gazed out the window, her entire being seeming to drift beyond the heavens, while Puyang watched Wei Xiu, waiting for her to turn back. A bellyful of worries suddenly seemed to become insignificant the moment she was before Wei Xiu. She would wait for Wei Xiu to look back at her, no matter how long it took.

Palace attendants entered with slow steps, silently lit the lamps, and silently withdrew.

Wei Xiu never turned around. Her gaze remained fixed outside the window. Dusk had turned to night, and the early autumn scene of mixed yellow and green had become a pitch-black expanse, making it impossible to distinguish the year or season.

They were in the same room, separated by mere inches, yet it was as if a thick membrane stood between them. Puyang could not cross it, and neither could Wei Xiu.

They had to have a resolution.

After a long while, Wei Xiu slowly opened her mouth. “My real name is Zhongmeng. Lord Zhong was my father. I came to the capital with the intent of seeking revenge, and I followed you because you could be of use to me.”

As the words left her lips, Wei Xiu felt her entire heart empty out. It ached, but there was also a sense of relief. She looked at Puyang. Puyang showed no surprise, let alone shock. Even the trace of pain in her eyes was so aptly concealed that not a sliver of it escaped.

Wei Xiu understood. She had known all along. She lowered her head and smiled. So, she had known for a long time. Puyang’s unusual behavior these past few days now had an explanation. The lies she had told her now had an explanation. She was not the only one sharing a bed but dreaming different dreams.

Wei Xiu raised her head, her gaze faint as she looked over, and asked in her usual calm tone, “I wonder, Your Majesty, what do you wish to ask me?”

The concealing veil was lifted, and both of them were laid bare. The way she looked at her was like looking at a stranger, devoid of any warmth. The years of gentle treatment were wiped clean by her single sentence. Puyang’s heart felt as if it were being butchered by a blade, aching terribly. But having reached this point, she supposed A Xiu would not want to see her become hysterical.

Puyang mimicked her calm and self-possessed manner and asked, “First, was the late Emperor’s death related to you?”

She’s already investigated this far? Wei Xiu tilted her head to look at her, a smile playing on her lips as she retorted, “Does Your Majesty believe he did not deserve to die?”

At her words, tears instantly welled up. Puyang tried her utmost to hold them back. The feud between their two families was now laid bare. The Wei Xiu before her was so unfamiliar that Puyang could hardly recognize her. She forced herself not to look at Wei Xiu’s gaze, which was as cold as an icy blade, to ignore her hostility and her hatred, and only stubbornly pressed on, “Just tell me, did you kill the late Emperor?”

She didn’t realize her eyes were already bloodshot, nor did she notice that her voice was on the verge of choking.

Wei Xiu averted her eyes, refusing to look at her. “The late Emperor lived deep within the palace. How could I have such an ability? It was the Prince of Jin. He personally administered the poison. I merely observed.”

On the way back to the palace, Wei Xiu had been thinking: if she had never fallen in love with Seventh Lady, if she had only been using her all along, how would she have handled it when the truth came out?

She could no longer disregard the spirits of her deceased family and insist on staying by Seventh Lady’s side. Besides, the chasm was impossible to fill; they could never get along as they once had.

Since it was so, why leave Seventh Lady with any lingering hope? It was better to sever this bond completely.

Seeing Puyang visibly relax, Wei Xiu shook her head helplessly in her heart. The Prince of Jin had been the one to act in the late Emperor’s death. If Seventh Lady was determined to investigate, she would surely find out. Things that left a trail could not be faked. The only thing that could be faked was the human heart. She would disguise her true feelings as false ones, to make Seventh Lady believe she was an unworthy person.

Puyang walked over to her, bent down to meet her gaze, and asked, “Second, did you ever have any true feelings for me?”

Wei Xiu reacted as if she had heard the greatest joke in the world. She let out a soft laugh, looked at Puyang, and shook her head, amused again. “If it were Your Majesty, would you fall for the daughter of your enemy?”

Puyang seemed not to see her mockery, nor her hatred. “I would. If it were you, I would.”

Wei Xiu was stunned for a moment. Puyang caressed her cheek, her gaze soft as she looked at her. She smiled, a smile anyone could see was filled with bitterness, yet she did not retreat, nor did she waver. She said softly, “A Xiu, being able to marry you is the best thing I have ever done in my life. When you said you wanted to spend a lifetime with me, that was the best promise I have ever heard. I know you hate me, hate the Xiao clan, so that sentence was probably just a jest you used to coax me,” the tears she had held back for so long finally fell, “but I took it seriously. I truly want to spend my life with you.”

Having reached this point, she still spoke her heart’s truth, even knowing that these words would likely only earn her Wei Xiu’s cold ridicule. She said them anyway. Between them, she was the first to fall in love, and now at the end, she was the one trying to hold on.

“A Xiu, at this point, tell me one true thing. Did you ever have the slightest genuine feeling for me?” Puyang’s eyes were red-rimmed and her face was covered in tears. She was determined to have an answer from Wei Xiu.

Wei Xiu gently wiped the tears from her face. Beneath her fingertips was Puyang’s skin, soft and delicate, making her yearn. This was her guiding light, the sole warmth on her life’s path, which was covered in thorns. She was so dazzling, like the warm sun in winter, bringing her salvation. But today, she had to push her away with her own hands. From now on, she would be alone again, enduring her lifeless existence.

Puyang already showed a hint of joyful surprise. Her expression was a little stiff, but she didn’t move an inch, pressing against Wei Xiu’s fingertips, obediently letting her caress her. Her eyes grew bright, a little timid, but filled more with anticipation.

Wei Xiu’s heart leaped along with it, as if they had already broken through all barriers and could be together without any distance or resentment. It was always like this; Puyang could so easily stir her heartstrings.

She couldn’t help but think, If only that day could truly come, how wonderful it would be.

But all she could do was hurt the person she truly loved. Wei Xiu’s gaze softened, but it was not her usual gentleness. Instead, it seemed to contain a cruel delight. “Forced by circumstances, I had no choice but to marry you. To this day, I still feel humiliated just thinking about it. On our wedding night, the late Emperor’s illness struck suddenly. You have no idea how fortunate I felt that I didn’t have to touch you. Every single moment with you has been utter torment. There wasn’t a second I didn’t want to leave. I never had any feelings for you. In my eyes, your affection was nothing but laughable.”

The air seemed to freeze. Every word Wei Xiu spoke was like a knife stabbing into Puyang’s heart.

The anticipation in Puyang’s eyes had not yet faded, but her heart was already dripping with bl00d. So this was how she saw her. She looked at Wei Xiu, lost and helpless. Wei Xiu still wore that same cold and cruel expression.

If it’s truly as she says, then A Xiu probably finds even looking at me for a moment disgusting. Puyang’s lips moved. Fear gradually filled her eyes, followed by avoidance. She didn’t dare to look at Wei Xiu, nor did she dare to speak again.

After an unknown amount of time, she slowly stood up. Her body was rigid, her steps stiff, like a tautly drawn bow that would snap and break at the slightest touch. She walked very slowly, each step weighing a thousand jun, but she never looked back. Stiffly, numbly, she walked out.

The door closed, leaving Wei Xiu alone in the room. She closed her eyes. After a long moment, she finally found the courage to call out silently, “Seventh Lady…”

Naturally, no one answered her.

This was for the best.

She lived in darkness, unable to advance or retreat. And there was no need for Seventh Lady to suffer with her.

Life is long. She has the world, she has the people. In a few years, perhaps there will be someone worthy of standing by her side. Between them, there will be no indelible hatred, no insurmountable chasm. He, too, will call her Seventh Lady, just as she did. By then, she would just be a part of Seventh Lady’s unbearable past. By then, whether it be a man or a woman, she only hoped that her Seventh Lady could find fulfillment and peace.

That would be enough.

After that day, Puyang no longer appeared in the Hall of Containing Light. She did not move to another hall to reside, but simply rested in the Hall of Proclaimed Virtue. Wei Xiu, for her part, never actively sought her out.

All contact between them ceased, as if neither existed to the other within the palace.

A month after Puyang’s ascension, envoys from all four directions finally arrived in the capital. Some came to offer congratulations, while others used the occasion to stir up trouble. These were minor matters. The Great Wei was powerful, its state prosperous and its people at peace. No matter what the neighboring states did, it was merely verbal sparring, and even that didn’t last long before they were rebuffed and ridiculed by the ministers.

The Prince of Han and the Prince of Teng claimed illness for days on end, never attending court. They also declined to attend palace banquets, hiding in their manors, behaving themselves quite well.

Puyang dealt with these matters every day, trying not to think of Wei Xiu, and especially not of the words she had said.

But since the matter existed, how could it allow her to hide?

As soon as the envoys left, the Gold Guard took action.

After more than a month of planning, nearly all of Wei Xiu’s subordinates were arrested. The operation had not been so smooth initially, but Puyang had spent many years with Wei Xiu. Even if she had never intentionally pried, she had inevitably learned some inside information. Relying on this knowledge, the Capital Commandant cast a wide net and handled the matter cleanly and efficiently.

This was a major affair and naturally could not be concealed. Everyone at court, from top to bottom, was speculating whether some rift had formed between the imperial couple. Grand Tutor Wei’s family was particularly alarmed and uneasy, repeatedly seeking an audience at the palace.

Puyang refused to see any of them.

Wei Xiu learned of this the next day. She had remained in the palace merely to await Puyang’s judgment. She hadn’t expected that while Puyang had not shown her face for days, she had been secretly making arrangements to deal with all of her people.

Wei Xiu couldn’t describe the feeling. Yan Huan, A Rong, and many others had followed her for over a decade. They had protected her, cared for her, and been loyal to her, like family.

She already felt that by giving up on revenge, she had wronged Yan Huan and the others who, like her, had lost family because of Xiao Yi. At this moment, she naturally could not abandon them.

Puyang was waiting for her in the Hall of Proclaimed Virtue. She knew she would come. She doesn’t like me, nor does she care about me, but she would never abandon those who are wholeheartedly loyal to her.

Between them, there had to be a final resolution.

Wei Xiu arrived extremely quickly.

She was led inside by the eunuch at the door without needing to be announced.

As soon as Puyang saw her, she waved a hand, dismissing all the palace attendants from the hall.

The Hall of Proclaimed Virtue already had the air of Puyang. Her preferred decorations, her accustomed paper and brushes, were all laid out in the hall.

Wei Xiu saw the difference at a glance. She moved forward in silence, stopping three paces before the imperial desk, and bowed in salute.

Puyang stood up, walked over to Wei Xiu, and stared at her blankly for a moment.

Wei Xiu looked the same, with no change. Only, there was a hint of melancholy between her brows, and her complexion was not very good. Her constitution was weak, and the weather had been turning colder these past few days. Puyang was very worried about her, but she had long since lost the right to care for her. She could only inquire about Wei Xiu’s daily life from the palace attendants.

She raised a hand, wanting to test the temperature of Wei Xiu’s hand, but Wei Xiu calmly moved away.

Puyang lowered her head and smiled, not pressing the matter. She walked to the window and closed it. After some thought, she still felt uneasy and added superfluously, “It’s getting colder by the day. Don’t forget to put on more clothes.”

“Thank you for your concern, Your Majesty,” Wei Xiu replied.

So clearly demarcated, so distant and cold.

Puyang knew that no matter how much more she said, it would be superfluous in A Xiu’s eyes. Her actions were merely debasing herself. But she had long since lost all dignity before A Xiu, so she wasn’t afraid of appearing a little more lowly.

Puyang personally poured a cup of hot tea and brought it to Wei Xiu.

Wei Xiu looked at her and accepted it. The heat of the tea passed through the white porcelain cup to her hands, which indeed felt much warmer.

Seeing her accept the teacup she offered, Puyang revealed a slight smile, looking very happy, as if this tiny, insignificant gesture from Wei Xiu could transport her from hell to paradise.

“A Xiu,” Puyang still called her this, without a hint of distance. She sat a little far away, as if afraid that getting closer would disgust Wei Xiu. Puyang’s expression was gentle and her tone calm as she began, “I know why you have come.”

Looking at her like this, Wei Xiu felt an unspeakable heartache. How deep must her love be to endure being hurt by her time and again, to hide the thousand wounds in her own heart, and still face her with such a gentle expression.