The Detective is Useless (GL) - Chapter 7

Actually, to determine the cause of a person’s death, the most direct method is scientific forensics.
What a detective needs to investigate are the motives and methods of the crime.

Although Jin Yunjue was grateful that Liu Yu had called her for assistance as soon as the case came in, from an objective standpoint—setting emotions aside—solving the case felt like taking a reward she hadn’t truly earned.
But since the detective agency’s funds were tight, refusing a case would mean waiting for bankruptcy. So, Jin Yunjue could only do her best to solve it as quickly as possible—not only to determine the cause of death before the forensic team but also to piece together the full story.

Just as Jin Yunjue was racing through various possibilities, Tian Sisi’s loud voice echoed from afar, testing her patience.

“Oh wow! Not bad! Someone sure knows how to use resources—look, a private little farm!” Tian Sisi crouched down to inspect a few unripe tomatoes.

The so-called “private farm” was barely a square meter in size, fenced with old wooden planks, filled with soil, and planted with a few crops.

“The homeless people around here often do this,” said Caizi, passing by. “The Environmental Protection Bureau said they’d send someone to clean it up, but that never happened. This is public land—it can’t be privately occupied.”
After a pause, he added, “The deceased seemed to be a loner. He stayed far from the others, which is probably why it took so long for anyone to find his body.”

“How heartless of the Bureau to drive them all away like that!” Tian Sisi clearly ignored the second part of what Caizi said—but Jin Yunjue didn’t.
A loner, huh? Could that have something to do with the cause of death?

While Jin Yunjue was still thinking, Caizi had already gone to report to Liu Yu.
“Boss, a few locals and homeless folks identified the deceased. He usually stayed within about 500 meters of here. Some witnesses said they’d seen him stealing crops from nearby farms. Xisu already checked with the farmers—they confirmed it. He used to sneak in at night to take some vegetables. The farmers pitied him, so they let it slide.”

Stealing? Jin Yunjue fell into thought. Could he have been killed because of it? Maybe someone finally snapped after being robbed of their hard work too many times?
Wait—why hadn’t Tian Sisi already jumped in to say, “The farmer is the killer”?

Thinking of Tian Sisi, Jin Yunjue turned around to look for her—only to find that Tian had left the “private farm” and crouched next to the body.
When Jin Yunjue looked closer, her eyes widened. Tian Sisi—was she about to kiss the corpse?! No, she was smelling it!

“Hey! What the hell are you doing sniffing the corpse?!” Jin Yunjue rushed over, pulling her up.
“Don’t contaminate the evidence or the scene, okay? Try being professional for once!”

“I already know the answer!” Tian Sisi declared proudly. “It’s suicide!” She even threw up a victory sign.

“What?” Jin Yunjue frowned. Oh no, was she about to claim she had some kind of sixth sense again?

“The body smells like almonds! He was poisoned by cyanide after eating too many almonds roasted at high temperature!” Tian Sisi said with certainty.

“Cyanide poisoning?” Liu Yu, nearby, frowned too. He’d heard that cyanide poisoning could cause an almond-like odor—but not everyone could detect it. Could Tian Sisi really smell it?

“When almonds are roasted at high heat, they can produce enough cyanide to kill. There was even a case of a man who died after eating forty-eight almonds roasted at 300 degrees for ten minutes. It was written in Aimon Detective Theater,” Tian Sisi explained.

Aimon Detective Theater? Jin Yunjue rolled her eyes. That was just a detective novel from a few years back—so Tian’s “deduction” was basically showing off something she’d read!

“Tian, this bag only had fifteen grams—there’s no way it contained forty almonds. And look—these are ordinary almonds. The leftover bits show no signs of further roasting.
Also, we’re under a bridge. Where would he find an oven?” Jin Yunjue really wanted to smack her on the head.

Tian Sisi pouted pitifully, avoiding Jin Yunjue’s fierce glare. She shuffled away like a scolded child.

Moments later, Xisu came running over. “Boss, we found these cooking tools nearby—looks like the deceased used them to cook.” He pointed toward the little “farm.”

Liu Yu and Jin Yunjue went to take a look—maybe they could find a clue.

“Cassava?” Jin Yunjue crouched down beside a half-cut tuber near the pot lid. “Brown skin, white flesh… Could he have mistaken bitter cassava for the sweet kind?” she murmured.

Liu Yu picked up the cassava. “It’s just cassava, right? What’s the difference besides taste?”

“Tian was right—the man likely died of cyanide poisoning,” Jin Yunjue said, glancing at Tian Sisi sulking in the distance, before focusing on the cassava.
“Sweet cassava can be eaten safely once peeled and thoroughly cooked. But bitter cassava requires a lot more processing—peeling, grating, soaking, filtering, fermenting, and then cooking completely. Otherwise, it’s poisonous.”

“Wait—cassava is poisonous? I eat chips all the time.”

“Processed cassava products like flour or snacks are safe because their cyanide levels are minimal. But raw bitter cassava can contain up to 400 milligrams of hydrogen cyanide per kilogram—enough to kill. Even as little as half a milligram per kilogram of body weight can cause acute poisoning,” Jin Yunjue explained.

Just then, Xisu added, “Boss, the nearby farm does grow cassava.”

“Take me there later,” Liu Yu said. If that were true, then Jin Yunjue’s theory might be right.

Jin Yunjue nodded. “Brother Liu, if my deduction is correct, you should check when the farmers started growing bitter cassava. This could’ve been an accident… or a setup.
Someone who knew the man’s habit of stealing could’ve deliberately planted bitter cassava to trap him.”

She sighed. “Hopefully, it was just an unfortunate accident. I’d rather not think too badly of people.”

“Boss, forensics is here,” Xisu said.

“Once the lab confirms it, we’ll know if you’re right,” Liu Yu said, patting Jin Yunjue on the shoulder. “Thanks, Xiao Jin.”

Jin Yunjue smiled. So the case was solved—more or less. At least they’d earn enough to keep the detective agency afloat a bit longer.
Come to think of it, she owed Tian Sisi some credit too. Despite her nonsense, it was Tian’s mention of cyanide that sparked the idea.

She walked over to where Tian Sisi was still sulking. The moment Tian saw her, she turned away.

“Hey,” Jin Yunjue said softly, “you were right—it was cyanide poisoning, but from cassava.”

Tian didn’t reply.

“Forensics is here,” Jin Yunjue continued. “If we’re right, the agency will get paid this month. With that, I’ll take you to Happy Land again, deal?”

That did the trick. Tian Sisi turned around, grinning. “Hehe! Since we have to wait anyway, let’s go for barbecue!”

“You go ahead. I’ll stay and help a bit more,” Jin Yunjue declined politely.

Tian pouted. “Come on, Xiao Jinjin, once a case is solved, there’s no extra pay for cleanup. Let’s go eat!”

“Be good. Go by yourself.” Jin Yunjue patted her on the head and walked back toward Liu Yu.

“So boring,” Tian muttered, checking her wallet. Good—she still had enough coins for the bus home.

Once home, she immediately opened the fridge to see what she could cook. Two steaks and three lamb racks—perfect for grilling!

She soaked the meat in salt water to thaw and pulled out her small indoor grill.
After ten minutes, everything was ready—except the meat wasn’t fully defrosted.
So she pulled out her secret weapon: two aluminum bowls. She sandwiched the frozen meat between them, pressing lightly so the aluminum’s conductivity would speed up thawing. Five minutes later, the steaks were ready to cook.

Humming as she worked, she sang off-key:
“When loneliness comes, what do I do? When I’m alone, what do I do?”
Then, louder, “I’m fine with being lonely! Nobody come hug me now!”

Completely tone-deaf, she still enjoyed herself.
“Who says girls can’t rock? Who says you can only barbecue outdoors? I’ve got my own grill, I’ll BBQ indoors—grill, grill, grill!”

She sprinkled salt, then reached for honey. “Eh? Where’s my honey?”
Realizing she’d forgotten it, she set the steak aside and called the supermarket.

“Hello! Are you still open? Do you have Duke Bee Honey?”

“We’re open until 10:30 p.m., ma’am. And yes, we have plenty of honey,” the polite voice replied.

“Oh!” Tian found her bottle at the back of the cupboard, unopened and not expired. “Hehe, I’ve got it too! Bye-bye!” Click.
The customer service rep probably rolled her eyes.

Finally, the food was ready. Tian turned off the grill and proudly brought two big plates of meat to the table.

She picked up her fork and knife. “Wow, this Angus steak is amazing!”
Grinning, she happily devoured her meal—good food was one of life’s purest joys.

After finishing a steak and a lamb rack, Jin Yunjue returned to the office.
Tian bounced toward her. “Xiao Jinjin! You’re back! I’ve got barbecue!”

Seeing Tian’s greasy mouth, Jin Yunjue rolled her eyes. Tian just hopped back to the table, singing her own ridiculous remix:
“Yeah, yeah, yeah—when’s dinner? You look even more handsome today, oh yeah!”

“Can you please stop singing?” Jin Yunjue sighed. Singing wasn’t a crime, but forcing others to hear it off-key should be.

“What do you want to eat? It’s really good!” Tian beamed.

Truth be told, the meat smelled amazing—and Jin Yunjue was starving.

“Fine, I’ll eat,” she said, walking gracefully to the table. Even hungry, she made sure to appear calm and elegant—yes, she had to remind everyone that she was not like the silly child in front of her.