The Knight Who Broke Off Our Engagement and Told Me to Never Show My Face Again Still Clings to Me Today, Even Though I Was Possessed and Turned Into a Villainess for Ten Years - 57 - Unknown Past 1
It has been half a month since I ended up in Eliza’s body.
Since that day, Rufus hasn’t visited the Haynes Baron’s house even once, and it seems he still hasn’t noticed that we’ve switched bodies.
Thinking about what Gerald told me, it’s probably natural.
Mabel is lying, pretending to have lost her memory. And if Gerald, who knows me well, is covering for her, then it might really be impossible for anyone to notice.
Most of all, since I had just collapsed from the side effects of the poison, there’s no way my kind parents or friends would suspect I had switched with Mabel.
“I wonder what Rufus is doing right now…”
Ever since I realized my feelings for him, I keep thinking about him more and more.
I can’t count how many times I’ve thought about wanting to see him, wanting to hear his voice.
Just imagining Mabel, who is using my body, getting close to Rufus makes my heart ache.
“…I need to be strong.”
If I don’t take action myself, nothing will change. Right now, the only thing I can do is gain Gerald’s trust and somehow create a chance to go outside.
When I looked at the clock, I saw it was about the time Gerald usually came. I quickly fixed my appearance a little and sat down on a chair.
As I practiced forcing a smile, the familiar sound of knocking echoed through the room.
When I answered, Gerald came in right away.
“Good morning, Sadie. Today, I brought your favorite flowers.”
“Thank you, Gerald.”
Gerald, with the same refreshing smile as always, handed me a big, beautiful bouquet.
I smiled and accepted it, and he sat down on a chair.
—Gerald comes to see me about six times a week, and we spend around three hours together each time.
The rest of his time, he goes to the Arclight Count’s mansion or helps out with work at home.
Every time I talked with him like we used to, while holding back my anger toward him, it felt like my heart was slowly being worn away.
“Yesterday, I went to the Count’s mansion again. Nothing has changed with everyone. Oh, Rufus Langridge was there too, and he was staying close to Mabel the whole time.”
“I see…”
“He totally believes she’s Sadie and is taking such good care of her. It’s really stupid. Unbelievable.”
Since I had already lied to Gerald, saying “It’s useless to expect anything from Rufus since he doesn’t even notice the switch,” I couldn’t let myself look hurt.
I forced myself to look indifferent and nodded.
Gerald stared at me with eyes that showed no clear emotion, but then he smiled happily.
“About the wedding… what do you think about the great cathedral in the western forest? I heard it’s popular with women.”
He’s talking happily about it now, but convincing him to have a wedding in the first place took a long time.
Gerald clearly didn’t want me to go outside at all and had shown reluctance.
Even so, I tearfully begged him over and over, saying that after all I’ve been through, not being able to see my family or friends ever again and not even having the childhood dream of a wedding would be too cruel. In the end, Gerald gave in.
He said things like, “Even if you hate me, I’m happy as long as you’re by my side,” but I knew deep down he wanted me to like him, even just a little.
I didn’t like using someone’s feelings for my own benefit, but I didn’t have the luxury of being picky anymore.
If things stayed as they were, I’d be locked away like this by Gerald for the rest of my life. I had to make him remove the chains and find a chance to get outside. There was no other way.
“Sadie? Did you not like the idea?”
I remembered visiting the great cathedral in the western forest once when I was a child with my parents.
It was a little far from the royal capital, but the western forest was huge and complicated. If I managed to escape, it might be a good place to hide.
From Gerald’s point of view, it was convenient because there wouldn’t be many people around. I clasped my hands together and acted excited.
“I’d love that! I’m really happy.”
“I’m glad. It will only be a small wedding for the two of us, though. I hope you won’t mind.”
“It’s more than enough. Thank you, as always.”
“I’d do anything for the one I love.”
—If you truly love me, then please let me be free.
I swallowed those words that almost escaped my mouth and forced a smile as I said “Thank you” again.
Gerald’s way of loving me was terribly selfish.
I couldn’t help wondering how someone who used to be so kind ended up like this.
I thought I knew him well, but in the end, I realized I knew nothing at all.
‘…When did you start liking me?’
‘It was eleven years ago, from the very first time I met you, Sadie.’
It bothered me how he said he knew me and loved me even before we met in that place, so I decided to ask him directly.
“Gerald, why do you love me so much? Where did we meet eleven years ago…?”
At my sudden question, Gerald’s eyes opened wide for a moment, but then he lowered his long eyelashes like he was remembering the past fondly.
“It’s kind of a long story, but is that okay?”
“Yeah, it’s okay.”
I nodded right away, and Gerald let out a small breath and quietly began to speak.
“…Actually, I’m not really a person from the Findlay Marquis family.”
“What…?”
“The real son of that family died a long time ago. I was taken in to replace him because I looked similar. I grew up in an orphanage and don’t even know what my real parents looked like.”
“That’s…”
Hearing such a shocking truth for the first time, I couldn’t hide my confusion.
Gerald looked at me, lowered his eyebrows, and gave me a gentle smile.
“Sadie, when you were little, you used to visit orphanages and hospitals with the Countess as part of charity work, right? That’s when I first met you.”