The Lost Lamb's Trap - Chapter 35.3

Chapter 35.3: Stars (2)

Get ready, how could I possibly snatch from a tiger’s mouth and compete with Lin Ke? Jiayang, you can’t give up because of a setback.”

Duan Jiayang choked up. She was moved by that last sentence. She lowered her head, bit down on the straw, and took a sip of the bitter juice.

It wasn’t sweet as it went down.

She clenched her fingers and looked up at Lan Yao. Lan Yao was sitting in her chair, and the sunlight from outside fell on her shoulders.

Lan Yao was bathed in sunlight, and she seemed to be glowing.

Lan Yao said, “Why don’t you ask me why I like you?”

Duan Jiayang was curious but was afraid of being moved and feeling even more guilty.

Lan Yao looked out the window.

Besides being moved, Duan Jiayang was also afraid of reality.

Reality was outside the window. The scorching sun was shining down. People were coming and going on the street, cars were parked haphazardly, traffic was congested, and a wave of heat was rising. University students chose to seek refuge in the restaurant, while office workers braved the heat and ran toward their office buildings.

If it was really like what her dad said, she would be too miserable. She didn’t want Lan Yao to like her for her own gain.

“In middle school, when I realized I liked girls, you would often appear. You would run from your house to mine. At that time, my feelings for you were strange. They were unclear and confusing. Once, I didn’t do well on an exam, and I got criticized when I went home. You came to my house to play, and you saw what was happening. You thought it was unfair and argued with my dad, saying that my brother was so stupid, but they didn’t blame him, so why were they scolding me? Although the adults all said you were naive and lacked emotional intelligence, and that you were silly, that was the first time someone had stood by me unconditionally.”

After that, Duan Jiayang always hated Lan Yao’s younger brother. When she saw him, she wouldn’t even say hello. At school, she would only reach out to Lan Yao and call her “Sister Lan Yao” on her tiptoes.

After she called her, she would smile.

Duan Jiayang would attend all of Lan Yao’s competitions dressed up, and she would be the most beautiful person in the crowd. She would excitedly tell people, “That’s my Sister Lan Yao.”

“My love for you wasn’t so earth-shattering. It was just an ordinary love. It accumulated slowly from all the little things in our daily lives, and over time, it became a love that grew with each passing day.”

“Have you heard this phrase?” Lan Yao said. Duan Jiayang turned her attention back to her. Lan Yao said, “Love arises from the unknown and grows deep and profound.”

“Do you remember when I first told you that I learned so much in school, but in the end, none of it was useful in the workplace?”

Duan Jiayang nodded. Lan Yao said, “Seeing you makes me feel like everything is still good. Jiayang, sometimes staying in place isn’t a bad thing. It’s you preserving your beautiful self.”

If it weren’t for Lin Ke, she wouldn’t have realized that ordinary love could become so intense. She had always felt that a quiet, calm love was good enough. She had been quietly loving her for years without bothering her. It was serious, yes, very serious, as if she believed that her love could slowly and gradually possess her. But now, she was provoked to possess her now, because if she lost her now, she would lose her forever.

“Every time you passed by my window, the sun would fall on you, and I could always see the smile on your cheeks. It was also nice to come out and talk to you.”

What a shame.

She only saw the sunny side of things.

She hadn’t experienced the time when Duan Jiayang was caught in the rain.

Duan Jiayang lowered her head, moved by Lan Yao’s words. It was very healing. She saw the light reflecting off the knife and fork in her hand.

She had to be careful when cutting her steak. She was afraid that the light would disappear if she wasn’t careful.

“Jiayang, what if… I want to walk the rest of the way with you? What if… when it rains, I’ll hold an umbrella for you and try my best to not let it rain in the world, okay?” Lan Yao said. “From now on, I’ll help you let go of Lin Ke. You walk toward me. You take one more step, and I’ll help you forget about Lin Ke. Can you do that?”

She said it seriously. Just one more step…

She had been moving forward step by step. As long as Duan Jiayang nodded, she would invade Duan Jiayang’s life and get rid of Lin Ke.

It seemed like this was the right path.

The meal was bland. Lan Yao took her out to wander. The two of them walked from the food festival to the international street, weaving through the unique architectures of different countries.

They walked for a very long time. It was windy at night. Duan Jiayang buckled her seatbelt. The air conditioning was off in the car, and the windows were half-open. The wind blew in, and Duan Jiayang slightly closed her eyes.

When they returned to the villa area, Lan Yao’s car turned at the fork in the road toward the Duan family’s house.

“Sister Lan Yao… I don’t think this is going to work,” Duan Jiayang suddenly said. “Let’s stop.”

She recalled the scene from that day and felt that she had already hit a dead end.

Duan Jiayang bit her lip. She said softly, “Pull over. Let’s take a walk.”

Lan Yao slowed down, trying to drive forward.

Duan Jiayang raised her voice and said, “Sister Lan Yao, it’s not your fault. It’s because… I can’t go up, and I can’t drag you down with me. You’re really, really great.”

“I’m so incredibly grateful that you like me… I just can’t climb up myself. It’s too tiring. I really can’t do anything right. Please, don’t be like me. You’re so excellent. Please follow your own path, really. I tried. If I had done well on the project, I would have tried harder, but the project failed. Besides being sad, I was also relieved that I wouldn’t have to hurt anyone else… That’s the real me. I should be a useless person. It seems like everyone should work hard and climb up to see the sun, but there’s a type of person who just can’t. They’re born that way.”

“You’re like the light that shines in, but I can’t welcome you. I keep hiding. I’m afraid… I’m afraid that people will tell me to work hard and be ambitious. You’re a climbing rose that grows upward, a rose that grows in the ground. But some flowers are just born to be unremarkable. I might be one of those people who was born into a good family, but I’m destined to be an ordinary person.” Duan Jiayang said, “Sister Lan Yao, you’re really, really great. From a young age, you’ve always been someone I looked up to and showed off. You deserve to be with someone great and smart, not someone like me…”

“The fact that you like me is so unexpected, and I feel so lucky. So when you pursued me, I thought about it all night, and I selfishly and excitedly let you pursue me. I didn’t think about the consequences. When you held my hand, my whole body was tense. I felt like it was wrong, but I also felt like I shouldn’t reject you. I’m so sorry. I swayed back and forth, welcoming you but feeling guilty.”

“The pressure is huge,” Duan Jiayang said honestly.

She said a lot of things in one breath. She hadn’t planned on saying any of this.

The car stopped. Duan Jiayang opened the car door. Duan Jiayang bowed deeply to her. “Thank you for liking me. I’m so happy and proud of this. You pursuing me also gave me so much confidence, making me feel like I’m okay the way I am… It made me feel like I could also read a quiet book with someone, share a sunset, and that I could actually look up at the sun and enjoy the light…”

Lan Yao got out of the car. Duan Jiayang lowered her head. The wind gently blew her hair. Duan Jiayang was in a suit, but she didn’t look like a mature professional. She looked like a child who had mistakenly worn an adult’s clothes.

Lan Yao’s voice was gentle as she soothed her. “It’s okay, Jiayang, you’re also great. I thought my confession and pursuit would have a tragic ending, but you’re telling me this, and I’m really… happy. I feel like liking you was the right thing to do.”

“There’s probably no one who gets such a high evaluation after being rejected.”

Instead of competing with Lin Ke, she was in a tug-of-war with Duan Jiayang. She used a little more force, afraid she would fall, and a little less, afraid she would run away.

Why did she say she liked Duan Jiayang?

At this moment, she really liked Duan Jiayang.

The wind blew gently, and Lan Yao’s voice softened a lot. “How is this your fault? It’s just… you… are very gentle.”

It’s just that you thought too highly of me.

You beautified everything.

When everyone was lost in materialism and becoming blurry, I was also enjoying your praise.

“Jiayang, can I ask you a few questions?”

Lan Yao said.

Duan Jiayang nodded.

She rephrased the question in her mind many times. In the end, she said, “That day, when Lin Ke and I fought, you could have rejected me right then. Why did you wait until now?”

Duan Jiayang lowered her head slightly and spoke honestly. “…If I had said it that day, it would have seemed like you lost. But I don’t think this is about winning or losing. It’s just that I’m not a good match for you. You’re great, but I can’t accept it.”

Lan Yao was stunned. She blinked.

Duan Jiayang looked at her. “Do you have any other questions?”

Lan Yao shook her head. She raised her hand, but as it was about to land on Duan Jiayang’s head, she pulled it back. She said, “Jiayang, in the future, when you have your own choice, follow your own path. Sometimes… your own choice is the right one.”

“Like now.”

This was something that not only Duan Jiayang could have ended, but Lan Yao also could have. But neither of them chose to. Now, they both had to bear the consequences.

“Let’s walk a little more, Jiayang,” Lan Yao said.

Duan Jiayang said, “Okay.”

Lan Yao was still trying. She reached for her hand. This time, Duan Jiayang’s hand didn’t jump around. It went straight into her trouser pocket. She didn’t want it…

One thing Lin Ke said was absolutely right.

Duan Jiayang was stubborn.

She was like a lone boat, swaying without direction. The wind could blow her, and the waves could push her, but once the boat hit a dead end, no one could pull it back.

The two of them walked back and forth in the community. After they went to the beach, it had rained in the city, clearing away the summer heat. It was much cooler now.

The moonlight was high, a crescent moon hung in the sky, and scattered stars dotted the area, not bright or sparkling.

Lan Yao looked up. At this moment, she had a lot of regrets. “What if… I hadn’t been so confident? If I had done this earlier, would the outcome have been different?”

At first, she had thought it would be simple. She would get past Duan Litian, and she and Duan Jiayang would have a good blind date and get together. She and Duan Jiayang would be a normal couple in real life, have a calm relationship, and then calmly walk into the bond called marriage.

Duan Jiayang stopped in her tracks. She didn’t think about it anymore. She knew that she couldn’t figure it out, and saying the wrong thing would only leave more regrets.

They were back at the fork in the road.

Lan Yao said to Duan Jiayang seriously, “Even when I was supposed to back away and when you should have found evidence that I wasn’t good, you still firmly believed I was great. You ignored everything, including my hidden motives, and only saw the best side of me.”

The two of them looked at each other, separated by a distance of two steps.

With just one more step, they could be close to each other.

Duan Jiayang smiled. “Sister Lan Yao, you’re truly wonderful. Don’t fall because of me. You’re really, really great and perfect.”

“Is that what you want to say to me the most?” Lan Yao asked. “Because that day, you heard what Lin Ke and I said. She asked me if I dared to fall, and I said I did.”

Duan Jiayang hummed in agreement.

“Don’t fall. Be a shining star.”

Lan Yao couldn’t help but laugh. She scoffed, laughing at herself and at Lin Ke. This person really had everything figured out. She did things cruelly and without any regard for others.

At that time, when she said those words, she thought Lin Ke’s silence meant she had won, or at least they were tied. But in reality, she had lost regardless of whether she spoke or not.

Lin Ke knew clearly that Duan Jiayang didn’t want her to fall like she had, not even to try.

She placed her hand on Duan Jiayang’s hair and gently ruffled it. “Got it. I won’t fall. I’m not the type of person who gives up easily anyway.”

Neither of them saw the other off. They turned and went their separate ways.

As she walked away, Duan Jiayang’s straightened back slumped. How could she dare to pull light down with her? She dragged her body back one step at a time. Unknowingly, tears began to stream down her face. She started sobbing without warning, and her expression was a mess. In truth, she was still foolish. She hadn’t learned anything from this experience. She was just pretending, acting like she had grown and understood everything.

Now, she just felt that it would be better if no one else liked her in the future. It was too painful.

When she had walked a little further, she heard footsteps. She turned her head and saw Lin Ke walking out of the shadows, following her at a leisurely pace.

Tears slid down her cheeks and onto her neck. Duan Jiayang turned around and continued to walk forward, one step at a time. Her shadows were huddled together. She no longer looked like a lively lamb, but an old dog with a broken leg.