The Reincarnated Transcendent Wants to Fill the Hole in Their Chest - Episode 10: Dream

Episode 10: Dream

…Konoe dreams.

It is a dream from the time he was in Japan. A dream of the past.

Konoe’s half-lived life. How the person named Konoe was shaped.

Why Konoe ended up like this. The reason why.

――By the time Konoe was old enough to be aware, he was already living alone.

His earliest memory was of his parents leaving the house with large luggage.

A memory of his younger self, knowing nothing. Just crying and crying.

Konoe never had a family to begin with. His home had already fallen apart shortly after his birt. It was due to his parents’ infidelity.

Cooking meals was the job of the hired housekeeper.

He had no friends.

Spending almost all his pre-school years alone inside the house, Konoe didn’t know the outside world.

So, when he first started going to school, he became isolated, mocked.

That didn’t change even until he graduated.

The housekeeper only did her job. Meals were served. Clothes were washed.

But there was no meaningful conversation.

She always scolded Konoe with an annoyed look.

Teachers treated Konoe coldly.

They saw him as a troublemaker who only brought problems.

Even when he was isolated or had stones thrown at him, they blamed Konoe instead.

…That was Konoe in his childhood. Always alone.

And he grew up still alone. No one was ever by his side.

So even when he entered higher education, even when he started working, Konoe remained alone.

He only ever held functional conversations. He couldn’t do anything beyond that.

Because Konoe didn’t know kindness. He only knew malice.

He believed that everyone secretly hated him.

And once he thought that, no words could come out.

He had developed a habit of looking at people with suspicion.

――And that hasn’t changed, even to this day.

Yes, it’s true. Konoe could never stop doubting.

No matter how many years passed, he couldn’t overcome the trauma of his childhood.

He couldn’t change.

Of course, Konoe had been taught that not all people are bad.

That was how it was supposed to be.

But he had lived his whole life in doubt. And by now, that form of life had become fixed.

Maybe it would’ve been better if he had gone to counseling.

Maybe he should’ve reached out to someone for help, even just once.

But he couldn’t. He couldn’t live that way.

He couldn’t believe in people.

As a result, he lived alone to the end. And he died alone.

No one held his hand. No one mourned him.

That was the entire life of the Japanese Konoe.

――That’s why.

Because that was his life.

On that day, 25 years ago, Konoe was drawn to the words “love potion”.

He saw salvation not in people, but in a drug.

With medicine, he wouldn’t need to doubt.

Even if he couldn’t trust human hearts, he could surely trust a potion.

If someone drank the potion, they would fall in love with Konoe.

For that purpose, he could endure coughing up bl00d.

Even if it was unbearably painful, he could keep walking. For years, even decades.

Thinking of that day kept him going.

He knew he was distorted.

He knew it wasn’t right.

Even so, for Konoe, there was no other way to live.

He believed that someone who had lived their life wrong could only be with others this way.

That’s what Konoe believed――

‘――That’s not true’

――Huh? Konoe thought.

He heard a voice from somewhere.

In a haze between dream and wakefulness, Konoe felt puzzled.

He felt like he heard a gentle voice. A voice he recognized.

One he’d heard once, a long, long time ago――

’――You’re not a mistaken child. You’re a kind child who can work hard for others’

It was a comforting voice. A gentle voice.

And somehow, it filled him with warmth.

So Konoe’s body began to relax.

Though he’d always felt cold, now it felt like he was wrapped in feathers――

‘――It’s okay. You’ll be okay, I’m sure’

Feeling a bit puzzled, Konoe sensed his consciousness rising.

He was about to wake up.

His body was floating upward. It was wrapped in warmth.

……And in that final moment, Konoe felt like someone stroked his head.

◆

“…Ah.”

Konoe wakes up.

When he opens his eyes, he’s in an unfamiliar room.

A guest room in the castle. Though he’s been staying here for about a week, last night was the first time he slept in the bed.

“…Kwaah.”

He yawns. He rose while scanning the castle and its surroundings.

No issues. No signs of nearby monsters.

Last night, two monsters had approached and he woke to deal with them.

Aside from that, there were no attacks.

Now, he only senses the presence of actively moving people.

So Konoe absentmindedly scratches his neck while sitting in bed.

“…Somehow, I feel good.”

He mutters to himself.

It was a surprisingly refreshing awakening.

Konoe had always been the type to have nightmares when he was tired.

So he thought for sure he’d have a terrible dream this time too.

After all, it came after seven straight days and nights of exhaustion.

It was one of the ten most exhausting experiences of his life.

The most exhausting, by the way, was the final exam when he was recognized as an Adept.

(…I wonder why.)

Regardless, he was surprised at how pleasant the awakening felt.

Of course, he didn’t *want* to have nightmares.

But having had them almost every time before, to suddenly not have one was puzzling.

Konoe tilts his head.

(…God?)

The word suddenly pops into his mind.

He doesn’t know why.

Maybe because the god had lent him power until yesterday.

Now, there’s no trace of that presence. So the god must have returned to the capital.

Gods are busy, after all. They can’t always stay close to observe an Adept.

(――Speaking of dreams…)

As if playing a word-association game, Konoe recalls a rumor he once heard.

It was in the break room—something other Adept candidates had been talking about.

That when someone borrows power from a god, they sometimes dream of the god that night.

Apparently, when receiving magical power, a link is formed between the person and the god.

And if that person has any guilt, the god appears in their dream and scolds them thoroughly.

Well, of course, it’s just a rumor. It’s not reliable.

And he hadn’t seen any gods in his dream this time…

Besides, if it *was* true, someone like him—thinking of love potion slave harems—would absolutely get scolded.

(…God…)

Konoe thinks of the god.

That pure white god. Not a human, but a higher being.

Someone from the heavens.

…And that must be why.

Konoe cannot bring himself to doubt the god…

When facing her, his tension melts away.

The smile in front of him, that kindness—it doesn’t come through words. But it reaches him directly.

It was the first time in his life he felt that way.

And so, Konoe kept going back to the god――

“――No, let’s stop that.”

Konoe shakes his head.

He cuts off that line of thought and lies back down.

He lets out a deep breath.

He’s allowed to rest a bit more today.

He just finished a major job.

Even his employer, Ternelica, told him to take a good rest.

“……”

Just to be sure, he checks for monster signs again and observes the movements of people.

He confirms seriously that no emergency is happening.

Then, Konoe exhales once more.

“…Phew.”

Once again, he relaxes his body.

His first job had turned out to be more serious than expected.

That wasn’t how the plan was supposed to go.

Well, it wasn’t like he had some grand vision to begin with. But he had imagined something easier…

Maybe open a clinic for terminal illnesses somewhere, earn money gradually—that kind of thing.

Slowly build up wealth. And if he could reach his goal within the year, that would be fine.

But somehow, this turned into a full-scale rescue of an entire town.

Why did it come to that?

Because at that time, he carried that girl, Ternelica.

“……”

…Well, it wasn’t something he regretted.

Even he had enough decency to feel happy about helping others.

Konoe thought that about himself.

“…Well, anyway.”

Anyway, the goal is now right in front of him.

In a little over twenty days, he would receive a thousand gold coins.

He could buy a mansion. He could buy slaves. The potion wouldn’t be too expensive, either.

Konoe’s potion-induced slave harem was just within reach.

Yes—this time, Konoe would――

“…Hm?”

Just as he was thinking that, a knock echoed in the room.

‘Konoe-sama. It’s Ternelica. Are you awake?’

“…Yeah, I’m up.”

‘I brought your change of clothes.’

When Ternelica asked “May I come in?”, Konoe then replied with “Go ahead.”

He then gets out of bed, quickly fixes his hair and pajamas, and waits for the door to open――

“――?”

“Konoe-sama, here you are.”

――Huh? 

Konoe thinks as he does a double take at Ternelica.

With a smile, she holds out neatly folded clothes to Konoe.

“…Konoe-sama?”

“…Ah.”

Frills swaying, dressed in a white and black apron outfit.

The long skirt sways with Ternelica’s movements.

…Konoe blinks several times.

Because Ternelica…

…was wearing a maid outfit.