The Shape of Happiness: A Family Crumbling Due to the Mother's Infidelity, a Wounded Middle School Daughter, and a Struggling Father Finding a New Form of Happiness. - Episode 43

One year after the day of judgment—

2:00 AM. A brightly lit, modern factory in the suburbs. Inside, multiple conveyor belts carry bento boxes and side dishes, while many workers, dressed in sanitary white uniforms, stand beside them. Their mouths are covered by large masks, and their hair and necks are fully hidden beneath hoods as they carefully arrange the food.

This is a food processing factory that produces bento boxes and prepared meals for convenience stores and supermarkets. Work is carried out at a fast pace to ensure deliveries are ready for early morning distribution.

“Nagata! Once you’re done with the kalbi bento line, move to Line Three!”

“Yes, understood! That’s the line with…”

The factory manager’s displeased expression is evident, even through his mask.

“You know, the new bento. It’s a hassle to prepare because of all the small details.”

“I have about ten more to finish. I’ll move to Line Three right after!”

“Thanks! That line is backed up, so I’m counting on you!”

The manager then hurried off to another section.

(Being called by my maiden name or introducing myself this way still hurts…)

Up until a year ago, my last name was Takagi. I wish I could still use it, but I can’t. I have no choice but to go by my maiden name, Nagata. Every time I say “Nagata,” it feels like I’m confirming that I’m no longer connected to Shinichi and Misaki. It pains me.

It has been a year now. I’ve been paying the alimony and child support every month as planned. Whenever Shinichi confirms the deposit, he always sends me a paper receipt. That meticulous, responsible nature is just like him.

I have to hurry to Line Three. My shift ends at 5:00 AM as usual. There are only three hours left until shipment, and if we don’t finish in time, the delivery staff will struggle. I can’t afford overtime either. At 6:00 AM, I have my morning shift at the convenience store. I can’t be late for that. I have to get this new bento done quickly…

◇ ◇ ◇ ◇ ◇

“I’m home…”

A greeting met with silence. It’s 10:30 AM, and I’ve returned to my apartment. Seven hours of night shift at the factory, followed by four hours at the convenience store. Saying it isn’t exhausting would be a lie. But this is my routine now. By working at the convenience store, I only need to do the office building cleaning night shift on Saturdays, allowing me to take Sundays off. I have to keep working hard. If I don’t continue atoning to Shinichi and Misaki, the guilt will consume me. Even after a year, the weight of my sins hasn’t lessened at all.

I rinse off in the shower booth, but as I look at my body, the memories of that time come rushing back. The photos and videos Atsushi took of me. The obscene poses, the smiling peace signs—I wasn’t the only one who saw them. Shinichi did. Misaki did. My heart pounds, my chest tightens. I feel like throwing up. I don’t want to see or touch my own body. Curling up inside the cramped shower booth, I groan in pain, alone.

Somehow, I manage to finish my shower. I sit down and eat a cheap bento and salad I bought from the factory. I no longer have the energy to cook, and I don’t want to eat something made by my own tainted hands.

Lying down on the tatami, I pull a small framed photo from my bedside table and hold it close as I slip into bed. It’s a family photo taken when we moved into our new house. This is the one thing I couldn’t bring myself to throw away. No matter how much I reach for it, no matter how much I long for it, the happiness I threw away will never return. I know that. And yet, I still pray.

(One day… I hope we can live together again, the three of us…)

But that’s just an illusion. A dream that will never come true. The three smiling faces in the photo—one of them is me. I’m smiling too. I looked so happy. So how did it come to this? Once again, my tears won’t stop falling.

(At least in my dreams… Please, let me see Shinichi and Misaki…)

Clutching the photo of my once-happy family to my chest, I desperately wish for this reality to be just a nightmare. That when I wake up, I’ll be back in our bedroom, with Shinichi sleeping beside me. I cling to that impossible hope as I slowly drift into sleep.