The White Moonlight Disdained by the Male Protagonist of Redemption - Chapter 19.1

Jie Zhongyi had been staying in the library for several days.

The library in Luoxiang Mountain was called a “library,” but compared to the collections of big noble families, it was very poor. It was just three straw huts filled with old, broken wooden shelves. The books on those shelves were even more worn out.

Still, although the place looked rough, none of the books were useless. Every book had great value. They were all sorted and edited by ancestors, removing the useless parts and keeping the important ones.

So, even though there were only three small huts, they were worth more than a whole palace library.

Jie Zhongyi didn’t do anything else during those days. He locked himself inside and studied without sleeping or eating.

He adjusted the lamp. After a small flicker, the light became brighter. He rubbed his eyes, held his pen tightly, and continued copying down the bits and pieces he had collected:

“Cangyuan was formed after the fall of the Fengtian River. It has lasted for millions of years. Generations of descendants lived there and never left. They could only leave if they passed the heavenly tribulation and ascended—or if they cut off all emotions, killed their loved ones, burned their past, and ascended with no feelings.”

“There were four people in history who succeeded in ascending. But none succeeded through burning emotions.”

Jie Zhongyi skipped the long details about passing the tribulation and turned directly to the part about burning emotions:

“Dragons are born with broken emotion roots. If they feel love, it goes against their nature. As a result, they grow scales, lose all feelings, and want to kill. Only by cruelly killing their partner can it end. After burning emotions and ascending, they forget everything and cannot be reminded. If someone tries to make them remember, it will hurt their brain, break their soul, and make them go crazy with no way back.”

“No… No, something’s wrong here,” Jie Zhongyi muttered.

He threw down his pen in frustration. His gray hair was a mess from being pulled too much.

There were four gods who had passed the tribulation—that part had been recorded clearly. But there were no records of anyone ever succeeding in burning their emotions to ascend.

If that’s true, then where did all these details about burning emotions come from?

These records came from the end of the ancient times. There were no earlier documents, not even in Luoxiang Mountain. Other clans couldn’t know more either.

He couldn’t even figure out the cause and effect. How could he find a solution?

Jie Zhongyi leaned back in his chair and let out a long sigh.

A voice came from the doorway.
“Grandpa Jie, you’re old. If you keep sighing, you’ll get wrinkles.”

Tu Manxing had appeared without a sound. She blew on her nails and gave a bright smile.
“Are you busy? I’ve got something to tell you.”

Jie Zhongyi, looking tired, waved her in.
“Come in.”

Tu Manxing closed the door and sat beside him.
“You’ve been working day and night. What are you doing?”

“I’m looking,” he said.

“Looking for what?”

He only said, “Just looking.”

Tu Manxing crossed her legs and leaned back in the chair, her arms resting on the sides. She spoke seriously:
“Old Jie, people say an old person at home is like a treasure. But you shouldn’t work yourself to death. Yao Yao is in such a rush to ascend because you’re getting old. She’s scared you’ll die.”

Jie Zhongyi got annoyed.
“Wow, you sure know how to talk. So nice, so sweet. I really don’t understand why Ran Qing chose you as his student.”

And seriously, is it really because he’s old? That fired him up. He started counting with his fingers.

“Why is she in such a rush to ascend? Didn’t you all think about it? Tangtang (Ning Tang) already said she’d never have children. If someone wants to have them, go ahead—it’s not her. You—you’re always chasing after women, falling in love all the time, but never marrying. Chuxiao says love is boring and a waste of time. Ning Yuzhu, ha! He likes no one. No one in the world is good enough for him.

Aren’t we about to die off as a family? Is it really all because of me? No! It’s because of this whole family!”

He glared.
“Didn’t you say you had something to tell me? Go ahead. Say it and then get lost, get lost, get lost.”

Tu Manxing spoke slowly.
“You see? You understand everything. So why are you still digging through all those books?”

She nodded at the stack next to him.

Jie Zhongyi went quiet.

Tu Manxing said, “Jing Zhuo is a good kid.”

Jie Zhongyi lowered his head and didn’t say anything.

She continued, “He’s kind in a way that’s hard to believe. Even after what Xuanyue Sect did to him, he never wanted revenge. When he needed to stop Murong Lianzhen’s evil spell, he did it right away. A person like that becoming a High God is a blessing for the world.”

Jie Zhongyi was quiet for a long time. Then he said,
“I’m not… doing all this just for Jing Zhuo.

“In the past, when people talked about ascending, everyone got excited like they were going to die a glorious death. But really, it was just talk. No one ever succeeded. Now, Yao Yao is actually at the final step. My heart… it really hurts.”

Even though for the Bodhi clan, death was the only way to ascend, it still broke his heart.

Tu Manxing said, “The arrow is already on the bowstring. There’s no turning back. Losing memory is good—it saves him from guilt. And when we see him, our feelings won’t be too mixed up.”

Jie Zhongyi sighed.
“Losing memory is good… for now. But I’m worried about later.”

“Jing Zhuo has stayed in Luoxiang Mountain for a long time. I treat him like my own child. You came back late, so you didn’t see. Chuxiao treats him like a real brother. Ning Yuzhu sees him as an older brother. And Yao Yao, she…”

“I’m just afraid… one day, she’ll be heartbroken.”

Being killed by someone…
That person losing all memory…
And still having feelings left behind…

That would be…
So painful.