Chapter 42: A Blatant Secret Crush

Just saying it once was enough to make Lin Yuran’s heart race to the point of fainting. There was no way she could repeat it again. Pretending she hadn’t heard him clearly, she bluffed, “What did you say? I said I’d go draw at the base.”

Chi Ye’s eyes fixed on the fringe of lashes shadowing her gaze. The corner of his mouth curved in a wicked smirk. “Not that one. The last sentence.”

Lin Yuran lifted a hand to rub behind her ear, trying to smooth out the heat burning there. “‘That I can draw in your office,’ you mean?”

“No,” Chi Ye pressed, refusing to relent. “The one after that.”

Lin Yuran kept up the act. “There isn’t any after that. The last one was ‘What did you say? I said I’d go draw at the base,’ wasn’t it?”

Chi Ye gave a helpless sigh. “Fine, whatever you say.”

Lin Yuran quietly let out a breath of relief.

She really couldn’t express herself well in words. Maybe she’d just have to show it with her actions. But… how? She couldn’t exactly just pin him down and kiss him, could she?

At the base, Yan Xi, Ji Mo, and the others were still training. Since Lin Yuran rarely came by because of school, the group of boys brightened instantly when they saw her, crowding around her like bees to honey.

“Sister Yuran, what have you been up to lately?”

“You don’t visit much anymore. Are classes keeping you that busy?”

Yan Xi, always one to pry for his boss, added slyly, “Sister Yuran, among all those guys chasing you at school, is there anyone you’re actually considering? Tell me, I’ll help you figure him out.” 

That reminded Lin Yuran, Yan Xi always claimed to be a ‘love expert.’ A thought sparked in her mind. She knew exactly how to act now.

Clearing her throat, she raised her voice a little. “Someone I’m considering? Actually, yeah, there is someone.”

At once, every boy turned toward Chi Ye. Their eyes gleamed with a mix of shock and sympathy.

“There is someone!” Yan Xi exclaimed, his voice tinged with disappointment. “So what kind of guy managed to win Sister Yuran’s heart? Tell us, I’m curious.”

“Hmm…” Lin Yuran propped her chin in her hands. “He’s tall, handsome, cool, confident, attentive, caring… and very, very capable.”

As she spoke, a faint blush crept up her cheeks.

Yan Xi stared. “Sister Yuran, your face turns red just talking about him. Looks like you’ve fallen hard, huh?”

Lin Yuran pressed her hands to her burning cheeks and nodded. “Mm-hmm.” Then she sneaked a glance toward Chi Ye.

Chi Ye was leaning back in his chair, eyes dim and distant, lips pressed into a straight, rigid line. His usually sharp features seemed carved in ice.

What…?

Chi Ye didn’t look like that was the reaction she’d expected. Lin Yuran sighed inwardly. She really didn’t understand him at all. Maybe she’d just have to take her time learning.

“So how far have you two gotten?” Yan Xi asked.

Lin Yuran looked at Chi Ye. “Nothing much yet. I’m planning to chase him myself, but I’m not very good at it. Got any tips for me?”

The boys froze, collectively stunned.

“Sister Yuran, you need to chase someone?”

Lin Yuran nodded, glancing again at Chi Ye. “Yeah. He’s that amazing.”

Their expressions were a mix of disbelief and utter confusion.

“Well? Any advice?” she pressed.

Yan Xi frowned. “Sister Yuran, you don’t need to chase anyone. If you just crook your finger, any guy would come running like an eager puppy.”

Lin Yuran actually considered the idea, imagining herself trying to ‘crook her finger.’ It sounded ridiculous. “I’m serious!”

“Then do what other guys do when they chase you,” Yan Xi said. “You’ve probably had plenty of experience being pursued.”

Lin Yuran covered her face in embarrassment. “Uhh… not really. I used to be so arrogant, I’d reject them right away. Even the persistent ones, I never gave them a chance. So…”

Yan Xi nodded knowingly. “Okay, first question, do you get to see him every day?”

Lin Yuran thought for a moment. “If I try, I can.”

“Good. Then listen. Love Tip #1: every morning, buy him his favorite breakfast and deliver it yourself.”

“Breakfast?” Lin Yuran frowned. “Can’t it be lunch? Mornings are tough.”

“Breakfast shows you’ve been thinking about him since you woke up,” Yan Xi said.

“Oh.” Lin Yuran nibbled her thumbnail in thought. “Got it.”

“Love Tip #2—”

“Okay, okay,” Lin Yuran interrupted, laughing. “Let’s stick to one tip for now. I’m clumsy enough as it is, so let me master that first.”

Yan Xi giggled. “Sister Yuran, you’re actually kind of cute. Fine, but update me once you make progress. I’ll teach you the next step.”

“Deal,” Lin Yuran smiled.

After a bit more small talk, Lin Yuran followed Chi Ye back to his office. He didn’t say a single word all afternoon. Once her mind settled, she lost herself in her drawing, and silence fell easily between them.

By six in the evening, Chi Ye drove her home. The car was quiet, no conversation, no music.

After glancing at her class schedule, Lin Yuran said carefully, “Chi Ye, I don’t have morning classes before winter break. I want to come to the base to draw every day. Would you still give me a lift, like before?”

Chi Ye’s tired gaze slid her way. His tone was cool. “Aren’t you busy chasing someone? Think you can manage?”

“I can.” Lin Yuran smiled, looking at him. “I’m a multitasking incarnate. I can balance work and love perfectly fine.”

“Fine,” he said simply.

The car fell into silence again.

As they neared Warner Garden, his phone rang. The light ahead turned red; he stopped and answered it lazily.

“Mm.”

“Mm.”

He listened for a few seconds, then turned toward Lin Yuran, dark eyes unreadable.

She was gazing out the window, watching the night deepen. A few flakes of snow drifted down, this winter’s first.

Sensing his stare, she turned to him. His eyes were shadowed and intense. She blinked, puzzled.

Chi Ye asked suddenly, voice low: “A guy told me to ask: what do you think it means when a girl says she likes someone, acts all flirty with him, but then goes and gives another man an actual title? What is that supposed to mean?”

He was clearly directing the question at her.

Lin Yuran ran it through her mind twice, then gave the bluntest answer she could. “A backup.”

She lowered her voice slightly, afraid the person on the phone might overhear. Then she blinked innocently at Chi Ye, as if the topic had nothing to do with her.

Chi Ye visibly stiffened. The cold of the early winter night seemed to seep into his sharp features.

From the phone, Liang Size’s voice came through: “Of course she’s treating him like a backup. Saying ‘I like you’ means nothing; giving a title, that’s love.”

Chi Ye lowered his gaze, his long lashes shadowing his expression. He watched the snow gathering on the windshield without a word.

“Chi, man, I’m sorry,” Liang Size continued. “That day I acted on impulse. I was just trying to help you out, but I made things worse. Come out to LOUNGE Nine tonight, drinks on me. Let me make it up to you, yeah?”

“Drinks? Sure,” Chi Ye said quietly. “I’ll come by later.”

Lin Yuran frowned.

There was a heaviness in his tone, a quiet sorrow. Was he planning to drown it in alcohol again?

Annoyance pricked at her chest. Lin Yuran leaned closer to his phone and raised her voice, “Who is that? Stop inviting Chi Ye out for drinks all the time! He’s not drinking!”

Only after blurting it out did she realize she’d crossed a line. They hadn’t exactly defined what they were yet. Embarrassed, she pulled back and looked away.

Chi Ye froze for a few seconds, then tossed the phone onto the console. Reaching over, he caught her sleeve and turned her toward him.

“Lin Yuran, what gives you the right to tell me what to do?” His voice was low and shadowed with emotion.

“I…” Her throat tightened. The words were out before she could stop them. It was too late to take them back. And since his tone toward her had been so sharp, a first, she felt her own irritation flare.

Lin Yuran glared at him, stubbornly. “I just do.”

Chi Ye’s brow twitched. His sharp gaze locked with hers, probing deep, as though he could see straight through her.

Lin Yuran didn’t back down. The air inside the car turned taut and silent.

Then, from the console, Liang Size’s voice cut in again. Apparently, the call hadn’t been disconnected. “Chi, forget it. Don’t drink. If Goddess Lin says no, you’d better listen. Best of luck.” Toot.

The call ended.

Hearing their canceled plans, Lin Yuran shot Chi Ye a sidelong glance, shook off his hand, and turned toward the window. Outside, the snow was falling heavier now.

Chi Ye let out a low breath of laughter, soft but tinged with bitterness. The light ahead had long turned green. Horns blared impatiently behind them. He stepped on the gas. The Apollo IE roared forward, slicing through the night.

Silence returned.

At the next red light, he glanced her way, once, twice, three times. She refused to look back.

The fourth time, he didn’t look away. After a long moment, Chi Ye said hoarsely, almost pleading, “Lin Yuran, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that. Don’t be mad.”

Lin Yuran kept her face turned to the window, lips curling faintly. “It’s fine.”

He said nothing more.

The light turned green. The car sped back into the night.

After a while, he turned on the music. Lin Yuran’s lips quirked in a quiet smile.

At another red light, she rolled the window halfway down and reached out, catching a few flakes of snow in her palm. “Chi Ye, look,” she said with a grin. “Your winter letter just arrived.”

Chi Ye tilted his head toward her hand. The tiny snowflakes melted quickly against her warm skin, turning into clear droplets.

He smiled. “Too fast. What did the letter say?”

Lin Yuran studied the melting snow in her palm and said solemnly, “It says: Chi Ye, don’t restrain yourself. Stay wild, stay free. Be reckless, be untamed, be bold. There will be someone who loves every side of you. Be yourself, your happiness is on its way.”

Chi Ye burst out laughing and ruffled her hair. “Lin Nuotao, you really know how to spin words.”

She grinned. “What can I say? I’m talented all over.”

They laughed together.

Three seconds before the light turned green, his laughter faded. His dark eyes fixed on her.

“So… does that mean I still have a chance?” he asked softly.

A gust of wind swept through the half-open window, carrying his uncertain words into the swirling snow outside, leaving behind a few stray flakes that landed on her shoulder.

“Ah, cold!” Lin Yuran shivered.

Chi Ye pressed his lips together and rolled the window up. The light changed; he drove on.

When they reached her building, Lin Yuran got out, turned back with a bright smile. “See you tomorrow, Chi Ye.”

Elbow on the wheel, fingers at his temple, he watched her. Snow was falling harder now, blanketing the ground in white. Her skin gleamed pale as moonlight against the snow. And even without the moon, the world around her seemed dimmer by comparison.

The snowlight reflected in her amber eyes, which shimmered like a fox’s – playful, luminous.

Snow settled in her silver hair, melting into it, making her look like a spirit of the winter night.

Chi Ye’s lips curved. “See you tomorrow, Lin Nuotao.”

He watched her close the car door, hop up the steps, disappear into the stairwell, then dart back out to stamp a trail of footprints in the snow before finally running inside, satisfied.

No, she wasn’t just a snow spirit. She was a mischievous little snow fox playing in the night.

Chi Ye stared after her, dazed.

If his soul had gone with her, so be it. He didn’t want it back. He was willing to lose himself completely in this little fox’s chaos.

Another first snow.

He didn’t go drinking that night, but he was utterly, hopelessly drunk.