The Young Marquis Regrets Too Late - Chapter 17

After the Dragon Boat Festival, the days grew hotter and hotter. The sixth month arrived quietly, and before anyone realised it, summer had begun. 

That ordinary afternoon, the sky outside was a vast, cloudless blue. The constant heat mingled with the incessant drone of cicadas and made it nearly impossible to stay awake.

Governess Liu stood on a platform while Jiang Jingchun sat below.

Jiang Jingchun could no longer hear what Governess Liu was saying. She rested her heavy head by propping up her chin on her hand. Her eyelids felt as if they were weighed down by a thousand pounds and refused to stay open.

Just as her eyes were about to close, the sound of a sharp sound of wood striking against the table startled her awake.

Jiang Jingchun snapped out of her daze and immediately sat up straight. Being a student under a strict teacher meant there wasn’t even room for a quick nap. She straightened her back and looked up at Governess Liu, only to see the older woman frowning at her.

Then, Jiang Jingchun heard her say, “What has gotten into you these days? Why are you so distracted every single day?”

Every day, Jiang Jingchun seemed muddled and absent-minded. She was frequently dozing off, and her studies were suffering. This state of hers was utterly unacceptable, especially compared to her previous performance.

Jiang Jingchun dared not argue and lowered her head in apology. “I’m sorry, Governess Liu. It must be the heat these past few days making me drowsy. I promise it won’t happen again.”

Jiang Jingchun hadn’t felt like herself since the Dragon Boat Festival, when she had met Gu Huaisheng. She felt utterly unhappy, too.

When she first came to Rongde Hall, it wasn’t entirely because she didn’t want to stay with her mother forever. In fact, the main reason she had decided to come to Rongde Hall was because of Gu Huaisheng.

She wanted to become someone he liked.

However, it now seemed to her that no matter how much effort she put into learning proper conduct, they’d all go to waste.

He didn’t like her—he just didn’t.

The weight of this realisation was about to crush her. She felt as if everything had lost its meaning. What was the point of learning these rules and etiquette if, no matter how well she mastered them, Gu Huaisheng would never like her?

This ‘relationship’ between her and Gu Huaisheng had ended before it even began.

She felt utterly miserable.

What excuse was ‘the heat’? It was nothing but a cover, and Governess Liu saw right through it.

Governess Liu saw that Jiang Jingchun was in no state to absorb anything and couldn’t be bothered to continue. “If this is how you are, I doubt anything I teach will get through to you. Fine, take a few days off. Return when you’re in better spirits.”

With that, Governess Liu turned and left.

Huayun, who had been by Jiang Jingchun’s side all along, knew her young miss’ current state was due to the events after the Dragon Boat Festival. She knew that this was no doubt because of Gu Huaisheng.

Seeing Jiang Jingchun’s dejection, Huayun suggested, “Miss, if you don’t wish to continue learning, why not return to Chongming Hall? Madame would surely be delighted.”

Return to Chongming Hall?

Jiang Jingchun stayed silent and didn’t respond to Huayun.

She turned her head to look out the window. The weather outside was unnaturally perfect, as the clear skies had banished any trace of gloom from the day. Yet, her heart remained shrouded in a thick fog. Her thoughts tangled, and frustration lodged in her chest like a boulder she couldn’t get rid of.

Lately, she hadn’t been able to focus on anything.

She had no idea what to do next. Should she return to Chongming Hall or stay here in Rongde Hall?

Jiang Jingchun was still lost in thought when someone summoned her to the old madame’s quarters. It seemed Governess Liu had already gone to report the matter, and now the old madame wanted to question her personally.

What would come, would come. Given her current poor state, it would’ve been strange if no one called her out on it.

Jiang Jingchun resigned to her fate. She rose and made her way to the old madame’s quarters.

As Jiang Jingchun approached the old madame’s quarters, a faint aroma of sandalwood greeted her. The old madame had long been devoted to Buddhist practices, and her worship meant that this scent permeated her living space. The wide-open doors and windows allowed the fragrance to drift outside.

Jiang Jingchun had already prepared herself for a scolding.

Her grandmother must be so disappointed in her.

Despite her advanced age, she still went to the trouble of guiding and protecting her incompetent granddaughter. And yet, here Jiang Jingchun was, behaving like useless mud that couldn’t stick to a wall; she fell apart at facing the slightest difficulty.

She entered the hall with her head bowed and stood silently in front of the old madame, waiting for the reprimand to come.

To her surprise, though, the reprimand never came.

Instead, Jiang Jingchun heard the old madame say, “It must be the heat that’s been making you feel out of sorts these past days.”

Not only did she not criticise her, but she even found an excuse for her laziness.

Jiang Jingchun looked up at her grandmother with a puzzled expression. “Grandmother, aren’t you upset with me? I’ve been making Governess Liu angry every day lately. Today, I even dozed off during her lesson, and she got so frustrated she refused to teach me anymore.”

Didn’t Governess Liu tell her about this?

Jiang Jingchun couldn’t understand why her grandmother wasn’t angry.

In truth, the old madame already knew that even before Governess Liu had come to her earlier to explain the situation. Governess Liu had merely explained what the old madame already knew.

However, instead of being angry, the old madame chuckled softly and asked, “Why would I be upset?”

She continued, “When people face difficulties, it’s natural to lose their way for a time. It’s entirely normal. Why would I blame you for this?”

She knew that her granddaughter was in pain. 

As her grandmother, she couldn’t take away that pain, but she certainly wouldn’t blame her for it either.

Not receiving the expected punishment only made Jiang Jingchun feel even worse. The emotions she’d kept bottled up these past few days finally erupted when she heard her grandmother’s gentle words. Her eyes reddened, and tears began to well up in her eyes.

The old madame couldn’t bear to see her cry, so she took Jiang Jingchun’s hand and gently pulled her closer.

“How old are you now? How could you still be crying like this? You cry when I scold you, and you cry anyway when I don’t. What am I supposed to do with you?” she said. Her tone was unusually soft as she spoke.

The old madame had a good idea of what was troubling her granddaughter.

Sure enough, Jiang Jingchun asked, “Is Cousin planning to marry someone?”

Yes, only Gu Huaisheng could reduce her to such a state.

The old madame turned to look at her and said, “Fuyan is already 21.”

Her implication was clear. It was indeed time for him to marry.

“Then why can’t it be me?”

Why couldn’t it be her?

She liked him so much, but he didn’t like her at all.

The old madame said, “Feelings are unpredictable. Just because you like someone doesn’t mean they’ll like you back.”

If that were the case, the world would be filled with countless tales of mutual love.

But the truth was, unrequited love was far more common.

She continued, “Instead of clinging to hopeless wishes, it’d be better for you to let go. What’s meant for you will come naturally without you even needing to ask for it.”

What was meant to be hers would naturally become hers, but if something wasn’t fated to be hers, then it wouldn’t be hers no matter how much she asked for it.

Jiang Jingchun didn’t respond. It wasn’t clear if she had taken her grandmother’s words to heart or not.

The old madame sighed and said, “But you can’t let your cousin’s potential marriage drive you to despair. I know you’ve been in low spirits these days. Forcing you to continue would only make things worse. Take a few days off to rest. When you’ve figured things out, come back. You needn’t hurry.”

That very same day, after Jiang Jingchun left the old madame’s quarters, Lady Li came looking for the old madame.

She wanted to take Jiang Jingchun back to Chongming Hall.

Although they were still living in the same residence, Lady Li still couldn’t see Jiang Jingchun often while Jiang Jingchun stayed in Rongde Hall.

They had agreed when Jiang Jingchun first came to learn proper conduct that she would return after her studies were complete. Now that she had clearly mastered the basics, there was no reason for her to stay there any longer.

Lady Li also knew that Jiang Jingchun would only listen to the old madame regarding this. Even though Lady Li wanted her to come back, it wouldn’t happen without the old madame’s approval. As such, she decided to appeal directly to the old madame. Besides, there was something else she wanted to ask her as well…

First, she said, “Mother, Xiaochun has been with you for quite some time now. I see that she’s learned most of the proper conduct, so perhaps it’s time for her to return to us. I wouldn’t want her to trouble you any further.”

The old madame understood what she meant. She counted the time and found that since Jiang Jingchun had been with her since late third month, and it was early sixth month now, it’d been two months since Jiang Jingchun came to stay with her. It wasn’t unreasonable for Lady Li to come now and request Jiang Jingchun’s return.

The old madame was, in fact, a bit surprised that Lady Li had lasted these two months before coming to fetch her daughter. She had originally planned to continue teaching Jiang Jingchun for a while longer, but since Lady Li had come to take her back, she saw no reason to refuse.

The old madame said, “She’s finally learned some discipline. Once you take her back, don’t spoil her too much again.”

Jiang Jingchun had learned quickly and put her heart into it. In just two months, she had made significant progress. 

However, what she had learned were merely the basics of proper conduct and virtues such as humility, patience, and discipline. As for skills like music, chess, calligraphy, and painting—those skills required years of practice, and it was already a bit late for her to start now.

Lady Li hadn’t expected the old madame to agree so readily. She had come prepared with a long list of arguments, as she feared that she would have to fight for her daughter. 

However, she instead received the old madame’s swift approval, which left her pleasantly surprised. She quickly replied, “Of course not.”

The old madame’s expression remained neutral to Lady Li’s words. This made it unclear whether she believed Lady Li’s promise at all.

After securing the old madame’s permission to bring Jiang Jingchun back, Lady Li brought up another matter. She said, “Mother, do you remember how Jingchun once had her name changed?”

At the mention of this, the old madame’s expression shifted slightly. Her eyebrows furrowed as she looked at Lady Li and asked, “Have you forgotten that she went missing once when she was young?”

Back then, when Jiang Jinghui was three years old, she had accompanied Lady Li to a temple on the mountain to offer prayers. However… during that trip, she had been abducted.

Perhaps the incident had been too traumatic for Lady Li. She couldn’t recall what had happened that year. When Jiang Nan mentioned Jinghui’s name to her that last time, she hadn’t been able to recall it; just like that, she had no memory of her child ever being missing now.

Jinghui…

Who was Jinghui?

She couldn’t remember.

The old madame said that Jiang Jingchun had once gone missing.

Everyone else seemed to remember it, and she seemed to be the only one who had forgotten.

Whatever had happened that year, she had completely forgotten it all.

She looked towards the old madame and seemed to want to ask what exactly had occurred back then. However, when she caught the old madame’s gaze towards her, she fell silent. She didn’t dare to ask further.

Some things were better left unspoken. Otherwise, one would never have a way forward.

The past events were unimportant.

What mattered now was that her daughter was still by her side.

Lady Li ultimately got her wish and took Jiang Jingchun away. Since the old madame had already allowed her to leave, Jiang Jingchun couldn’t say anything else and just went to pack up. She then returned to Chongming Hall with Lady Li.

Now that Jiang Jingchun was back, Lady Li’s face all but beamed with joy. She held Jiang Jingchun’s hand and chattered away. “I’ve been wanting to bring you back for ages, but your grandmother always kept a close eye on you and wouldn’t let you go. I didn’t expect her to let you go so easily now.”

She gripped Jiang Jingchun’s hand and noticed her fingers had grown noticeably thinner. Lady Li then turned Jiang Jingchun’s face towards her to have a closer look.

She wasn’t just thinner—her complexion looked drained and haggard.

What had happened to her?

Lady Li stopped in her tracks. She pulled her closer and asked, “For heaven’s sake, why have you let yourself become like this? Did the old madame mistreat you?”

Before leaving, Jiang Jingchun had been a vibrant young girl. Even during the Dragon Boat Festival not long ago, she had looked fine. Yet, in such a short time, she seemed as if someone had drained her vitality. The dark circles under her eyes were especially pronounced.

Jiang Jingchun remained sullen. She dismissed Lady Li’s questions lightly by saying, “Grandmother would never treat me that way, Mother. Don’t overthink it. It’s nothing serious. It’s just the heat making me lose my appetite.”

“Is that so? Then we’ll need to bring out the ice containers earlier this year.”

Jiang Nan, Jiang Jingchun’s father, served as a minister, and his salary was not meagre. Moreover, the household had only two children—Jiang Runchu and Jiang Jingchun. There were no concubines or illegitimate children with whom to divide resources. Lady Li also possessed substantial wealth in her name. Because of this, Jiang Jingchun had always lived comfortably and had never endured any hardship growing up.

Even though it was only the sixth month, Lady Li insisted on preparing ice containers for her out of fear that she might feel overheated.

Still, after hearing Jiang Jingchun’s explanation, Lady Li didn’t overthink her condition anymore. She fully believed that it was just the summer heat affecting her appetite.

As the two walked towards the decorative gate, they happened to encounter Jiang Runchu, who had just returned from his post. He was still dressed in his blue official robe, as he was freshly back from the government office.

When Jiang Runchu saw Jiang Jingchun and the servants behind her carrying numerous bags of different sizes, he immediately guessed that it was time for her to move back from the old madame’s residence.

Seeing her in such a haggard state, Jiang Runchu blurted out, “Oh, did you get your heart broken?”

Upon meeting her, Jiang Runchu couldn’t resist teasing her.

Jiang Jingchun’s current appearance made the reason obvious to anyone with a discerning eye. Especially since, recently, Madame Gu had been arranging matches for Gu Huaisheng. Seeing him interact with other young ladies must have made Jiang Jingchun green with jealousy.

Jiang Jingchun couldn’t be bothered to respond to him. Instead, she turned to Lady Li and said pointedly, “Brother is already 22. Why hasn’t Mother arranged a marriage for him yet?”

At this, Lady Li felt her head start to ache. She really didn’t want to think about this matter. 

Jiang Runchu was simply too picky, much like Gu Huaisheng. Lady Li had been anxious about his marriage for the past two years, but all her attempts to get him a bride had been to no avail.

Initially, she tried to reason with him gently. However, as time went on, whenever the topic of marriage came up, her attitude towards Jiang Runchu grew increasingly cold.

Now, Jiang Jingchun deliberately brought it up again.

As expected, Lady Li began scolding Jiang Runchu.

Jiang Jingchun stood to the side and gleefully watched the scene unfold.

Jiang Runchu was furious at first, but after a while, it seemed as though something crossed his mind. The irritation on his face gradually dissipated. 

Finally, after Lady Li had finished venting, he turned to Jiang Jingchun and retorted, “My marriage is just a matter of time—it’s not that complicated, just like Fuyan’s. But what about you? You refused to learn proper conduct back then, and you know nothing of the arts. I’m so embarrassed to call you my sister. Honestly, who would want to marry you?”

His words hit Jiang Jingchun right where it hurt. She didn’t care whether Jiang Runchu liked her—she disliked him just as much.

However, she cared if Gu Huaisheng liked her.

Jiang Runchu said that he was embarrassed by her, but to Jiang Jingchun, it felt like he was voicing Gu Huaisheng’s disdain as well when he said that. She felt that through his words, he was saying no one would ever like someone as inadequate as her.

Her face flushed with anger, and she fired back, “Fine! Then go find a sister you like better—I couldn’t care less whether you like me or not!”

To her surprise, Jiang Runchu fell silent for a moment. His expression turned strange.

Then, as quickly as that strange expression had appeared, it vanished. His face became blank, and he said coldly, “Do you think I want you as my sister?”

With that, he strode away.

Jiang Jingchun was stunned. Lady Li reacted faster than she did, and she immediately said in outrage, “That damned child! I’ll beat him to death today!”

His words hadn’t just pierced Jiang Jingchun—they had stung Lady Li as well.

Lady Li was about to chase after Jiang Runchu, but Jiang Jingchun stopped her. Perhaps because she had been upset just moments ago and her emotions were still running high, her lips had turned pale.

She shook her head at her mother and said, “Forget it, Mother.”

She wanted to let it go, but Lady Li refused to. 

However, when Lady Li was about to say something, Jiang Jingchun spoke first. She said, “I’m a bit tired. I’d like to rest now.”

With that, she walked away and headed back towards the courtyard she’d stayed in at Chongming Hall.