Thirty-Six Stratagems for Divorcing a Wife (GL) - Chapter 10
Jin Qingqin heard someone rattling the window. Figuring it must be Lu Jianshou—that clumsy fool who didn’t know martial arts—probably too scared to really jump, she was about to go open it. But before she could, Nian Nianshi had already kicked open the door and stormed inside, her expression cold and sharp, eyes fixed on the window as though she could see straight through everything.
Startled, Jin Qingqin guiltily pushed the half-opened window shut again. She had no idea what had happened outside, but remembering Lu Jianshou’s urgent instructions before leaving, and desperate to save her own skin, the first thing she blurted out to the murderous-looking Nian Nianshi was:
“I didn’t see anything! I swear I didn’t see your Lu Jianyi!”
But Nian Nianshi seemed not to hear a word, striding toward her, step by step, closing the distance—so close she was nearly upon her…
Jin Qingqin’s heart raced wildly. She thought her secret—that she liked women—had been exposed! It must’ve been that big-mouthed Lu Jianyi who spilled it! Sure, she did like Lu Jianshou, but if a great beauty like Nian Nianshi insisted on becoming her “second spring,” wasn’t it way too soon, with Jianshou’s bones not even cold yet?!
So when Nian Nianshi flung open the window, Jin Qingqin snapped, panicked, and instinctively shoved her aside.
And at that exact moment, after fiddling with the window for what felt like an eternity, Lu Jianshou—unaware that it had finally been opened—lost her balance, toppled head-first inside, and crashed down on them.
Inside, Nian Nianshi hadn’t expected Jin Qingqin to push her—or maybe her anger had blinded her to anyone else’s presence.
Jin Qingqin, for her part, didn’t realize that all her earlier fantasies had been nothing but shameless daydreams.
So both of them ended up sprawled beneath the one who fell in, with Lu Jianshou landing squarely on top like a human cushion.
Smack!
In that tangled heap, Jin Qingqin—whose chest had just been thoroughly groped in such a compromising position—reacted by slapping Lu Jianshou across the face.
Clutching her stinging cheek, Lu Jianshou staggered to her feet, dazed and unsteady. Before she could say a word, a sharp wind whipped past her—Nian Nianshi had already seized a teacup from the table and flung its contents at Jin Qingqin’s face.
“How dare you slap her?!”
The scene slowed to a crawl in Lu Jianshou’s eyes: icy water droplets and dark Longjing tea leaves scattering down, drenching her face and hair, soaking her clothes, plastering her bangs across her forehead.
It was the first time Lu Jianshou had revealed martial skill as “Lu Jianyi” in front of Nian Nianshi.
Back during the tea-serving incident, even in a life-or-death moment, she hadn’t reacted this quickly.
Realizing this, Nian Nianshi’s heart twisted. “Lu Jianshou, what do you mean by this?!”
“You… what do you mean?!” Lu Jianshou wiped her face haphazardly, her expression clouded with unease and irritation. “What kind of madness is this, first thing in the morning? Why would you splash her?”
Nian Nianshi forgot herself, throwing dignity aside, snapping back in front of everyone: “You ask me why? We’ve been married only two days, and already you’re sneaking off to meet an old lover. I haven’t even blamed you for that—so tell me, who am I doing this for?!”
The crowd murmured in shock. Lu Jianshou couldn’t fathom why she was so furious, but the public embarrassment burned. In anger, she snatched the teacup and hurled it to the floor. The sharp shatter silenced the onlookers at once.
For the first time, she unleashed her temper, her words cutting and harsh:
“Nian Nianshi, you think too highly of yourself! Who I sleep with, when I come home, whether I slap someone or not—it’s none of your business! You have no right to meddle! Who do you think you are? If not for your pretty face, what else made you worth marrying? If I’d known you were this unreasonable savage, I’d have treated you like the plague! You’ve gone too far—making a spectacle of me in public! You’re forcing me to write your divorce papers right here and now!”
At that, even the so-called “mistress” Jin Qingqin couldn’t stomach it anymore. With all the righteous flair of a swordswoman, she stepped forward to defend justice:
“Lu Jianyi, what nonsense are you spouting? You’ve been married not even two days! How’s a girl supposed to show her face after that?”
Nian Nianshi’s fury only deepened. She regretted that the slap Jin Qingqin had delivered earlier hadn’t come from her own hand—nothing seemed to vent her rage enough. Her apricot eyes blazed as she stared at Lu Jianshou, who wavered again under Jin Qingqin’s words.
At last, unable to hold back, she ground out between her teeth:
“You bastard!”
And with sleeves flying, she stormed off, light as a startled swan.
Back home, Lu Jianshou reflected and realized she’d gone too far.
After all, Nian Nianshi was her wife. Even if a husband cheated, a little jealousy on the wife’s part wasn’t exactly a crime.
What’s more, everyone knew about her elder brother’s past affection for Nian Nianshi. Now that she was posing as Lu Jianyi, if rumors about the Huibin Tower incident spread, she’d be painting her infatuated brother as a scorned, betrayed lover.
The thought made her uneasy. She began to wonder if she ought to apologize.
She lingered outside Nian Nianshi’s door for a long time, unable to knock. The maids Jin Yi and Jin Xiu grew anxious.
“My lord, the Princess has a noble body—she stayed up the whole night for you! At the farewell ceremony you swore she should wait for you! No matter what, it’s not you who should be angry!”
Lu Jianshou’s heart twisted at those words, but her tone stayed defensive: “Who told her to splash Qingqin in the first place?!”
“You really are stubborn as a mule!” Jin Xiu snapped, finally losing patience. “Our lady wouldn’t lower herself to live with such a hypocrite as you! You might as well write the divorce papers now—I’m sick of watching this farce!”
Fine. Write them then.
Lu Jianshou, provoked, barked: “Chang Huan, bring me brush and ink!”
“Master…” Chang Huan wavered. He couldn’t understand how his young master could agonize for so long, then be set off again by just a few words.
Seeing him hesitate, Lu Jianshou stormed to the study herself. “Tell your lady to pack her things. No one will stop her. She can come fetch her divorce papers at the hour of You (5–7 p.m.)!”
In the study, she ground the ink and lifted her brush, but couldn’t bring herself to write.
Only by Shen hour (3–5 p.m.) did she finally scribble out a few lines in the traditional style:
The undersigned, Lu Jianyi, Imperial-appointed Fifth-rank General of Xuande, was granted marriage with Lady Nian by imperial decree. Yet since entering this household, she has erred in many ways, fitting the Seven Grounds for Divorce. Out of regard for our bond, I refrain from harsh words. Willing to return her to her family, free to remarry without dispute. This divorce is real.
Inscribed on the day of Jingzhe, Intercalary Third Month, Year 32 of the Qiandi Era.
Reading it over, she thought it neat, concise, almost elegant.
Not bad for someone who’d always gotten dizzy at the sight of written characters.
She sat back, waiting for Nian Nianshi to fetch it. Deep down, she still hoped Nian Nianshi would be shameless enough to refuse to leave, giving her an excuse to apologize and make peace.
But when Xu hour passed and no one came, she worried the woman had simply left. With a conflicted heart, she finally took the letter herself and went to the bedchamber.
The room was as before—empty of Nian Nianshi. Most of the dowry maids from Prince Yao’s household had been dismissed, leaving it lonely and bare.
Melancholy rose in her chest. She sat at the table, poured a cup of tea from a still-warm pot, and raised it to her lips.
Just then, the door burst open. Fresh from her bath, with Jin Yi and Jin Xiu in tow, Nian Nianshi entered. Startled, she asked, “What are you still doing here?”
Relieved she hadn’t left, Lu Jianshou’s heart leapt, though her confidence faltered at Nian Nianshi’s cold tone. “I… I came for your signature…”
She laid the divorce paper flat on the table. In truth, she hoped Nian Nianshi would shamelessly cling on, giving her a chance to relent, to apologize, to reconcile.
But Nian Nianshi only glanced at the letter. A trace of scorn touched her lips. Then—rip, rip!—she tore it to pieces, letting the scraps flutter down like snow.
“You…” Lu Jianshou leapt up, pointing at her in anger. “What do you think you’re doing?!”
Nian Nianshi glared, arms folded across her chest, gaze fierce and defiant.
“And what right do you have to divorce me?”