To Be the Male Lead's Deceased First Wife in a Historical Chinese Exam-focused Novel - Chapter 44

Chapter 44: She Can’t Live Without Yan An

Yan An tilted her head back, her brows unconsciously furrowed tightly.

“It can’t be, can it? I’m not a cripple yet.”

She was injured on her back and had a sprained ankle, but she wasn’t a cripple who couldn’t use her hands to eat!

“You’re not a cripple. I just don’t want you to be in pain,” Wen Ying explained softly while pursing her lips.

“It’s still strange,” Yan An mumbled. She was lying on her stomach on the bed, and Wen Ying had brought the dining table to the side of the bed. It was so thoughtful that Yan An felt speechless. Besides, eating while lying on her stomach looked very weird!

Seeing that she was unwilling, Wen Ying asked gently, “Then how do you want to eat?”

“Help me up and let me sit at the table,” Yan An said after thinking for a moment. Her main injuries were on the left side of her body. As long as the movements of her right hand weren’t too big, she thought the pain would still be within a bearable range.

Wen Ying was still a little worried, but under Yan An’s insistence, she came to the side of the bed. However, instead of helping Yan An up, she directly picked her up and placed her on the chair. She didn’t forget to get an outer coat to put on her to prevent her from catching a cold.

Yan An: “…”

She was a little dazed. She felt that Wen Ying was making her look so delicate.

Since Yan An was already sitting down, Wen Ying served a bowl of soup and placed it next to Yan An. She said worriedly, “If you can’t do it, just call me.”

Yan An pursed her lips and secretly glanced at Wen Ying. She thought to herself that she wouldn’t be unable to do it. It wasn’t like she couldn’t even drink a bowl of soup!

However… to drink soup, she needed to hold a spoon in one hand and a bowl in the other.

Yan An: “…”

If she placed the bowl on the table to drink, she would have to bend over and lean her head forward, which would pull on her back injury and cause a lot of pain.

Seeing that Yan An was not moving or saying anything, a hint of a smile quickly flashed in Wen Ying’s eyes. She didn’t sit across from Yan An, but next to her. She reached out and picked up the soup bowl, holding it at a suitable height in front of Yan An, signaling her to drink.

When Yan An saw this, she silently held the spoon, blew on the soup, and drank. She no longer tried to be strong.

Wen Ying looked at Yan An obediently drinking the soup, a faint smile on her lips, but it also contained a hint of bitterness.

“I’m done.”

Yan An said after drinking half a bowl of soup.

“Okay,” Wen Ying obediently put the soup bowl back on the table and moved the dishes closer to Yan An, making it easier for her to pick up food later.

“Don’t worry about me. You eat your own food,” Yan An looked at her sitting next to her like a maid serving her food and felt a little speechless. She really wasn’t at that point!

“Mmm, I’m eating,” Wen Ying held her chopsticks and put a mouthful of rice into her mouth, but her eyes were always on Yan An’s movements, observing if she needed anything.

Yan An: “…”

The two of them didn’t need to cook too much food. For dinner, besides the steamed perch, they also stir-fried some choy sum that they grew themselves, along with some vegetable and tofu soup. It was just the right amount for the two of them.

Yan An picked up a piece of choy sum for herself and ate it slowly. Perhaps it was because it was grown in the winter, the choy sum had a sweet taste. For Yan An, who had been eating banquet food for so long, this vegetable was the most delicious.

“The dishes you cook now taste so good too,” Yan An couldn’t help but say.

When they were eating wild vegetables before, Wen Ying might have been worried that they weren’t cooked through, so she would always overcook the vegetables, which resulted in them losing their crisp texture. But now, it was almost visible to the naked eye that Wen Ying’s cooking skills had also improved.

Hearing her praise her cooking, a faint smile appeared on Wen Ying’s lips. “I’ve been living with you for so long. It would be unreasonable if I didn’t improve at all.”

She would watch Yan An when she cooked. After watching for a long time, she naturally and gradually learned how to cook. She also had different ways of handling different dishes. Moreover, Yan An would also occasionally tell her what kind of flavors different cooking methods would create.

“Mmm,” Hearing her say this, Yan An didn’t say anything, but the proud expression on her face was fully displayed. After she was done being happy on her own, she put on a serious face and said, “Then you’re the smart one.”

Wen Ying’s smile became even wider when she saw her so proud that she looked like a tail was wagging in the sky. She picked up a piece of fish with her chopsticks and put it in her bowl. “Then you try this one I made? I made it according to the way you taught me.”

Since she said that, Yan An didn’t refuse. She picked it up and took a bite. Perhaps it was because it was a wild perch, the texture of the meat was better than the farmed fish she had eaten in her previous life. In addition, the fish Wen Ying made was tender and the sauce was also very well seasoned. It tasted great.

“It’s very good. You can definitely sell it,” Yan An commented. She genuinely felt that the steamed perch Wen Ying made tasted better than many of the ones she had eaten outside.

Hearing her say this, Wen Ying’s smile grew even wider. “Then eat more.” As she spoke, she put another large piece of fish into her bowl.

Yan An frowned at her action. “You eat your own food. I’ll get it myself if I want to eat.”

This person was afraid that she wouldn’t have enough to eat. She picked up such a large piece that it almost covered the rice in her bowl.

Because of Yan An’s picky taste in rice, they were now mostly eating refined white rice, or they would soak the brown rice for a long time before cooking it. In short, Yan An had finally been able to eat solid rice.

“Okay,” Wen Ying responded. Only then did she pick up her own bowl and slowly start eating.

Yan An looked at her awkwardly. She felt that it was very strange for two people to sit on the same side and eat. Their hands and feet couldn’t even move freely.

In the past, Yan An always found it strange why couples would sit together to eat. In her opinion, if they weren’t both left-handed, one of them would definitely be restricted when eating, and they might even bump into each other.

At this moment, Wen Ying was sitting on her left side. Although she felt it was a little strange, she didn’t get in her way when she ate. But Wen Ying was also right-handed. How could she look so natural sitting next to her? Didn’t she feel like she was in her way?

Yan An secretly pouted. She felt that Wen Ying was really worried. It wasn’t like she couldn’t move both of her hands, so why would she need her to sit next to her and take care of her? Besides, if she really wanted to take care of her, she could just sit across from her! That way, they wouldn’t get in each other’s way.

After finishing dinner with a little difficulty, the next problem was taking a bath.

Yan An looked at Wen Ying, who looked like she was about to personally help her bathe, and was silent.

“No, I’ll wash myself,” Yan An said that she wouldn’t agree to Wen Ying helping her with the bath. If she helped her, what would that look like between the two of them!

Wen Ying frowned slightly when she saw her unhesitatingly refusing. “But how are you going to wash yourself like this? Doesn’t it hurt?”

Of course it hurts!

Yan An answered loudly in her heart, but on the surface, she just grumbled, “I can still endure that little bit of pain. It won’t stop me from taking a bath myself.”

To let Wen Ying help her with the bath after she took off all her clothes, she would rather die!

Wen Ying frowned and looked at her for a long time. Seeing that Yan An didn’t budge at all, her eyes dimmed a little. She squatted down in front of Yan An, held her hand, and couldn’t help but say in a low voice, “Yan An, why aren’t you willing to rely on me a little more?”

Why did she always have to draw such a clear line between them and always push her away?

“I…” Yan An was at a loss for words for a moment. She didn’t know how to explain that it wasn’t a matter of relying on her, but a matter of whether she could accept it herself.

Yan An was a typical southerner. It was difficult for her to accept showing her naked body to others. The only time she would be naked was when she was a child and her mother helped her take a bath before she could take care of herself.

And what Wen Ying said was also very strange. Why would she rely on her? Relying on someone was an addictive thing. What if she relied on her and then she couldn’t be counted on? Wouldn’t that be like stabbing a knife in her heart? She didn’t want that.

“That’s not what I mean. I really feel that I’m not at the point where I need to rely on someone else completely. If you really want to help, can you help me when I’m really lying in bed and can’t move?” Yan An said in a negotiating tone.

“Yan An!”

However, her words seemed to have poked Wen Ying in the wrong place. She suddenly called her name with anger, which startled Yan An. When she looked again, she found that Wen Ying was glaring at her with an angry look.

Yan An: “…You, why are you suddenly so agitated?”

Yan An stuttered for a moment. She was intimidated by Wen Ying’s current appearance. The oppressive feeling she gave off when she was angry was so strong, especially for Yan An, who was used to her gentle and obedient appearance. The contrast made her heart shrink.

In an instant, Yan An had a feeling that she was a paper tiger who bullied the weak and feared the strong. She was so arrogant toward Wen Ying on a daily basis, but as soon as Wen Ying became fierce, she would turn into a quail.

Wen Ying took a deep breath and stared at Yan An. “Don’t say such bad things again. There will never be a day when you are lying in bed and can’t move.”

The words were said through gritted teeth. Yan An’s face showed an awkward expression. “I know, I know. I won’t say it.”

She was talking about herself, and she didn’t even feel like it was an ominous thing. This person’s reaction was ridiculously big.

When she heard her say this, Wen Ying’s expression softened a little. She went to the kitchen and brought in the hot water that had been boiled. After everything was ready, she looked at Yan An. “Are you really sure you don’t need my help?”

“No, no!” Yan An immediately refused. Even if it hurt to death, she wouldn’t let her help!

Wen Ying looked at her silently for two seconds, then nodded slightly and turned to leave the room, closing the door for her so she could wash up by herself.

When the person left, the tension on Yan An’s face finally eased. She couldn’t help but let out a sigh of relief and slowly started to take off her clothes.

Not only did her right ankle hurt, but the injury on her back also hurt. But to prevent Wen Ying from coming in to help, she endured it without making a sound. When she finished taking off her clothes and got into the bathtub, Yan An was in so much pain that her whole body couldn’t stop trembling slightly.

The wound on her back was surrounded by hot water, which felt both hot and comfortable. Yan An took a deep breath and felt a little sad as she washed herself. She would have to put an ice pack on it again later.

Wen Ying, who was outside the room, sat in the main hall. She tried her best to pay attention to the situation in the room. When she didn’t hear any sounds of things falling, she felt at ease. But when she thought back to Yan An’s previous attitude, she couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed.

She didn’t know what to do to make Yan An see her and change her opinion of her, but she knew one thing for sure.

She couldn’t bear to lose Yan An.

She couldn’t live without Yan An anymore.

Wen Ying sat silently in the main hall. Her figure looked excessively thin and lonely under the dim candlelight. She also didn’t want her mind to be so invested in another person, but she couldn’t help but be fixated on Yan An, which caused her mind to be led by Yan An.

She was the only accident in her gray and small world, and she was also the savior of her difficult life.

Wen Ying would not allow herself to have the possibility of losing Yan An.

Yan An, who was in the room, didn’t know what kind of existence she was in Wen Ying’s heart. If she had known, she would have told Wen Ying in a heartfelt manner that this was an unhealthy psychological state.

She was holding herself up so high and placing herself in a subordinate position. In the long run, it would only create a kind of paranoid phenomenon, which could easily cause great psychological problems.

But she didn’t know, so she missed the chance to correct Wen Ying, who was falling deeper and deeper.

After Yan An finished her bath, she gritted her teeth and endured the pain to put on her clothes. She was a little weak as she called out Wen Ying’s name.

Wen Ying came in and saw Yan An lying on the bed in her middle clothes, and she hadn’t even pulled the blanket over herself.

Wen Ying frowned slightly when she saw this. She quickly walked forward and hugged Yan An’s body to help her lie down properly. She also pulled the blanket that was under her to cover her so she wouldn’t catch a cold.

“Are you okay?” Wen Ying asked softly.

“Mmm,” Yan An pouted and responded in a muffled voice with her face buried in her arm.

She was far from fine. She would have to stay in this position for at least a few more days.

Seeing her like this, Wen Ying didn’t say anything more. She just went to change the water in the bathtub. After she quickly washed up, she came back to apply another ice pack to Yan An for pain relief.

Yan An: “…”

She was hating the Wen family more and more!

In the end, Yan An lay on the bed and didn’t even make a sound. When Wen Ying pulled the blanket over her, a hint of warmth came from her cold back.

“…”

After everything was done, Wen Ying got on the bed and carefully held Yan An in her arms, trying her best to avoid her injured areas.

Yan An felt too weak to complain. Wen Ying still didn’t let go of her even in this state. Did she really not fall asleep if she didn’t hold her for one day?!

She wasn’t her A-bei-bei!

However, Yan An didn’t say anything in the end. She closed her eyes and tried to get sleepy, wanting to rest her body as much as possible. After all, she still had a banquet to do in a few days. After that banquet, she should have a period of time to rest.

Even though Wen Ying still looked a little thin, she was like a stove when she slept with Yan An. Wen Ying didn’t even need to buy a hot water bottle. After she held Yan An to sleep, Yan An slept very warmly, and her feet were no longer so cold.

When she woke up the next day, Yan An was worried about Wen Ying’s situation after she was beaten by her mother yesterday. She once again asked to see Wen Ying’s back. Bruises might not show up so quickly. Just because there weren’t any yesterday didn’t mean there weren’t any today.

Wen Ying looked at her helplessly and in the end, she turned her back to her and took off her clothes.

After covering up for a winter, Wen Ying’s skin color had lightened up a bit, but it wasn’t much. Several dark marks had appeared on her wheat-colored skin, which were clearly bruises from where she was hit yesterday.

When Yan An saw this, she pursed her lips, and a look of displeasure appeared between her eyebrows.

“It’s bruised. How could your mother hit you so hard!”

Wen Ying calmly put her clothes back on. “It’s nothing. It’ll go away in a while.”

Yan An frowned at her calm and accustomed appearance. She arched her lower body like a caterpillar, and then propped up her upper body to sit half on the bed. “Go get some water. Then you lie down, and I’ll put a compress on you.”

She would put some medicine on tomorrow. Even though the bruises would eventually heal without medicine, it would take a long time, and the pain would last longer.

“No need. It doesn’t hurt much,” Wen Ying said softly. She didn’t want Yan An to go to the trouble.

Yan An frowned and looked at her without saying a word.

Under Yan An’s gaze, Wen Ying understood that if she didn’t listen, she would get angry. In the end, she just sighed in her heart. She went to get the water, handed the towel to Yan An, took off her clothes, and lay on her stomach in front of Yan An in her inner garments.

When she saw her like this, Yan An took a deep breath. She wet the towel, but it was hard for her to use force, so she couldn’t wring the towel dry. However, at a time like this, a cold one would also work.

“Does it affect your daily movements?” Yan An asked while applying the compress. Although Wen Ying’s movements looked normal, Yan An already knew that this person was really good at enduring pain. Even if it really hurt, she would probably endure it and not show it.

“No,” a hint of a muffled sound also appeared in Wen Ying’s voice.

She lay on her stomach and felt Yan An’s fingertips occasionally land on her back. Even in such a serious situation, she still couldn’t help but feel her heart ripple, one after another.

Yan An didn’t say anything more. She carefully applied the compress for her. Afterward, Wen Ying got up and put on her clothes. She didn’t let Yan An move first. Instead, she went out and brought in another basin of water to apply a compress on Yan An before helping her put on her clothes.

Yan An: “…”

But fortunately, after the ice pack, the pain in Yan An’s back was no longer so intense today. After getting up, she went to the kitchen with Wen Ying, but Wen Ying still didn’t let her do anything. At most, she let her sit by the stove and help watch the fire.

While they were preparing breakfast, there was a knock on the door.

The two of them looked at each other and couldn’t help but wonder if it was the Wen family. But would they come back so soon?

However, all their thoughts were instantly dispelled when they heard Auntie Li’s voice from outside. Wen Ying quickly went to open the door.

As soon as the door opened, Auntie Li’s eyes kept looking at Wen Ying. “I saw smoke coming from your chimney, so I figured you were up. I came over to see how you were doing. Are your injuries serious?”

Wen Ying welcomed Auntie Li in. Hearing her words, she said gently, “I’m fine. Yan An just fell and hit a stone on her back, and she injured it.”

Just then, Yan An also walked out. Auntie Li took a closer look and found that the upper half of Yan An’s body was a little stiff, and her right leg was a little lame. She must have twisted it.

Seeing this, she couldn’t help but curse, “Those people are really going too far! What would have happened if something serious had happened!”

Fortunately, she hit her back on the stone. What if it was her head?

Wen Ying pursed her lips when she heard Auntie Li’s words, and her face looked sad.

Yan An noticed Wen Ying’s expression and quickly comforted her. “They didn’t get any benefits, did they? They also got a beating afterward.”

The embarrassed way the family ran away at that time showed that Auntie Li’s family hadn’t held back.

“They deserved it!” Auntie Li spat. Just the thought of those people being so arrogant in front of Yan An made her think about what kind of life Wen Ying must have had when she was alone at home before.

“Thank you for your concern, Auntie Li. But it’s nothing serious. As long as they don’t come to cause trouble again, it’s in the past,” Yan An said with a slightly bitter smile, but there was nothing she could do about it.

In this world, it was just like this. If they dared to show any bad attitude toward the Wen family, those people who believed that filial piety was the most important thing would probably come over and spit on them. This would have a certain impact on Wen Ying’s reputation.

Wen Ying heard Yan An’s words and pursed her lips as she looked down. She didn’t say much.

Given Yan An’s situation, Wen Ying didn’t let her do anything. All the chores in the house were taken over by Wen Ying again. However, the time for going to Yi Shu Hua’s house for class today was much earlier. According to Wen Ying, she wanted to go and cut some pig feed first, then go directly to Yi Shu Hua’s place, and then come back with the pig feed after class.

Yan An didn’t stop her when she heard her say that. Anyway, Wen Ying was a person with her own ideas, and she didn’t need to worry too much.

Since Wen Ying had finished all the chores in the house, Yan An, who had nothing to do, started reading in the study or checking on Wen Ying’s calligraphy practice.

Wen Ying’s calligraphy was taught by her. To a certain extent, there were still some similarities between the two of them. However, Wen Ying was still a beginner. Her writing wasn’t truly good yet, let alone having her own style.

But compared to the characters she first wrote, it was already much better. At this rate, Yan An believed that it wouldn’t be long before Wen Ying could write well.

Even though Yan An had read the original novel, she still couldn’t help but be amazed by Wen Ying’s progress. She even felt that her progress was faster than in the original.

Yan An was starting to wonder if Wen Ying would be able to pass the imperial examination next year. However, this thought only popped up for a moment. As Wen Ying was still in a one-year mourning period for her wife’s parents, she would only be able to take the exam the year after.

This was also good. It would give Wen Ying time to study, and she would be more confident in taking the exams.

Ahem, the main reason was that Yan An really wasn’t confident that she could open a restaurant in the city and move there within a year. She also needed time to accumulate wealth!

Yan An felt a little sad. She felt that she was useless and was dragging Wen Ying down, and she couldn’t let Wen Ying go to the city to receive a better education earlier.

But she was only sad for a moment. She didn’t think she was perfect, but she wasn’t doing too badly right now, right?

While holding the book, Yan An rubbed her cold hands and couldn’t help but sigh softly in her heart.

She was so idle now. If she had enough cotton, she could turn it into yarn and knit a sweater for herself. This way, it would look good and wouldn’t be too bulky.

When she thought about Wen Ying’s hands, she could also knit a pair of gloves for her to keep them warm.

But…

In the evening, Yan An glanced at the door and felt that Wen Ying was coming back a little late today. In the past, she would have already been back by this time.

A faint sense of unease popped up in Yan An’s heart. Since something like that had just happened yesterday, she couldn’t help but overthink it, so she wanted to go out and meet her.

If she were to run into the Wen family again, even if she couldn’t fight them, she could at least shout for help.