Wish to Get Rich But Wear a Scumbag A - Chapter 14

A knock sounded at the door.

Qi Xingwan’s eyelashes fluttered. “Come in.”

After a moment, Yan He cautiously poked half her head through the doorway. “Qi Xingwan, what do you want for dinner?”

Qi Xingwan slowly opened her eyes, staring at Yan He for a few seconds before replying in a languid voice, “I want to eat you. Will you give yourself to me?”

Terrified, Yan He slammed the door shut, forgetting her head was still caught in the gap.

And just like that, she gave the female lead a live demonstration of getting her head squeezed by the door.

And she did it herself, too. QwQ

The pain sent her leaping three feet into the air, howling as she scrambled back into the room.

Pfft! Hahahahaha!

Qi Xingwan’s Favorability +10

“Stop laughing! Call a doctor! Why is my voice hoarse?” Yan He clutched her neck in panic. “Oh no, oh no, oh no! Did I hit an artery?!”

“Let me see?” Qi Xingwan pulled her hand away and gently pushed it aside, barely suppressing a smile. “Oh my, it’s bleeding!”

Yan He’s eyes widened in horror. “!!!”

Yan He: Xiao Qi, I won’t report you anymore! Help me, help me, help me! QwQ

Yan He: It’s been a whole day! Why aren’t you at work yet?!

Just as Yan He was about to despair, a robotic voice, tinged with reluctance, suddenly chimed in:

Mission: Remove the block on Adjustment Department employee 007!

Yan He: O.O???

She seemed to have blocked the System…

Temporary mission completed

Yan He: Seven!

007: …Stop yelling. You just got your head caught in a door, not walked through a mountain of knives.

Oh.

It didn’t get her neck, huh…

Yan He calmed down, casting a resentful glance at the female lead.

People often say the eyes are windows to the soul. At that moment, Qi Xingwan observed a multitude of emotions in Yan He’s eyes, but none of them were anger or malice. There wasn’t a trace of the Alpha who had humiliated and beaten her earlier.

Distracted, Qi Xingwan reached out and gently touched the mark left on Yan He’s forehead by the door.

Yan He huffed, “What are you doing?”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to do that.”

Yan He muttered under her breath, “I think you did it on purpose. Hurry up and tell me what you want to eat.”

Qi Xingwan hesitated. “You’re going to cook again?”

Hey! What’s with the attitude?

Do you think just anyone can eat my cooking?

“Hurry up and tell me! I’m starving,” Yan He said, rubbing her stomach pitifully.

The morning’s “loving breakfast” had turned into a crime scene, and she hadn’t eaten enough.

Three meals a day, no exceptions. If breakfast was lacking, she’d just eat more at lunch. But she’d accidentally overindulged, causing a carb coma. In her dazed state, she dreamed that Duke Zhou was offering her King Zhou’s private treasury, making her deliriously happy.

Probably exhausted from waking up too early, she’d slept straight through until evening.

She’d only just woken up when she knocked on the female lead’s door.

Qi Xingwan considered it. Knowing she had a variety show appearance and auditions coming up, she couldn’t afford to indulge. “No need to trouble yourself,” she said. “An apple and a cucumber will do.”

“Absolutely not,” Yan He retorted. “Take that back and say it again.”

Seriously, who eats cucumbers for a candlelight dinner? Who?!

Qi Xingwan teased, “Then how about some noodles?”

Completely oblivious to the female lead’s sarcasm, Yan He beamed like a happy puppy. “Great! I’ll go make some noodles for you right away!”

007 had just finished processing the Host’s message about becoming the female lead’s lapdog:  Ramen?

Yan He was wrestling with shrimp veins:  It’s deluxe, premium ramen! The beef cubes and vegetables are freshly cut, and I even added shrimp and abalone.

Just as a weapon works best when it fits the hand, cooking familiar noodles makes the task twice as efficient.

Yan He thoughtfully added an extra noodle cake to her own portion:  Xiao Qi, can you control your colleague? I’m charging ahead on the front lines, and it’s desperately trying to sabotage me from behind. What’s the deal?

She had barely managed to stabilize the female lead’s emotions when a performance task nearly sent her packing back home.

007 was speechless:  Be nicer. I still owe it System Points.

Yan He:  ? Isn’t it just an artificial idiot?

Even its voice was the original, unadulterated robotic tone, like a dilapidated mech rusting in a cyberpunk junkyard.

007:  Shut up. The Host’s tasks are tied to your character alignment. The female lead’s Favorability toward you is still at negative infinity—standard villain setup. How could it possibly assign you normal tasks?

Oh my god! What do I have to do to please the female lead?!

Yan He hadn’t been this frantic in ages. She decided to do something to relax.

As Qi Xingwan approached the kitchen, she was hit by an acrid, pungent smell, so intense it felt like smoke from a fire, stinging her eyes and bringing tears to her face.

“Miss Qi, our Miss has gone mad!” The chefs outside had already used up an entire pack of tissues.

“She…” Has she figured out the bomb formula?

“She was cooking noodles when she suddenly screamed and started tearing through the cabinets, demanding onions!”

Qi Xingwan: “???”

Donning the mask and goggles a chef handed her, Qi Xingwan pushed open the door. She saw the Alpha, knife in hand, expertly peeling and slicing onions.

A mountain of onion scraps piled up beside her, the pungent odor engulfing the room like a ravenous beast. Yet Yan He showed no signs of discomfort, even seeming… relaxed?

“You…”

Hmph! Yan He saw her enter and hacked at the onions with renewed vigor.

What are you staring at? Haven’t you ever seen someone relieve stress before?!

“Your phone’s been ringing non-stop.”

“Just leave it. It’ll stop ringing when the battery dies.”

Yan He, noticing the female lead’s disdain for this stress-relief method, finished chopping the onion and began cleaning up. “Stay back a bit. Don’t blame me if you start crying…”

Qi Xingwan wouldn’t approach that pile of onions even if Yan He hadn’t warned her. She wasn’t crazy.

As they spoke, the phone rang again.

Qi Xingwan’s tone was icy. “Aren’t you going to answer? It’s Shen Tinglan.”

Shen Tinglan?

Who’s that?

Is she someone important?

Yan He shook her head dismissively.

Mission: Accept Shen Tinglan’s invitation and go to Drunken Spring for the rendezvous.

Damn it.

“Wait outside for a bit. I’ll cook the noodles after this call,” Yan He said, bowing obsequiously as she ushered Qi Xingwan out. Her fingers nearly poked a hole through the phone as she answered. “Hello?”

Ring, ring, ring! As if you’re the only one who can make noise!

“He’er, I’m at our usual spot. Come out for drinks. I want you to meet a new friend.”

Hearing the voice on the other end, Yan He immediately unlocked the relevant plot points in her mind.

If the Original Host was the emperor of their friend circle, Shen Tinglan was undoubtedly the one who held the most favor in the emperor’s heart.

Yan He had a distant relative, and Shen Tinglan, being that relative’s cousin, was practically family.

The two shared compatible temperaments and maintained a close relationship.

In the original novel, Shen Tinglan made few appearances but played a pivotal role. Every time she appeared, she was either committing mischief or on her way to do so. She was the primary architect of the Original Host’s abysmal favorability rating.

Yet she remained fiercely loyal, preferring to rot in prison rather than testify against the Original Host as a witness.

Tonight, the “Great Architect” delivered a major blow. She dragged the drunk Original Host into a wild night at a nightclub, which was promptly captured on camera and sent trending by eager onlookers.

Rumors of the Original Host’s arrogance had long circulated, and this incident solidified them. Stubbornly, the Original Host insisted on continuing her participation in the reality show, leaving the production team too intimidated to remove this “living deity.”

The reality show’s climax saw the Original Host’s reputation utterly ruined, her image as an arrogant and malicious figure deeply ingrained in the public consciousness. This, in turn, tanked the Yan Group’s stock price, setting the stage for the corporation’s crisis and the Original Host’s eventual imprisonment.

“Alright, I’ll be right there.”