You Are Gentle, But You Don’t Love Me - Chapter 16

Cassio was too busy whispering to the horse to notice Juliet’s tightly clasped hands. The horse, as if understanding his words, nodded a few times before turning and galloping in the direction they had come from.

“I thought riding back would be too much, so I sent it to fetch people from the castle.”

“To the horse…?”

Cassio shrugged with a faint smile, crinkling his brow slightly. Watching him, Juliet couldn’t help but let out a small laugh.

Regardless, the horse would undoubtedly return straight to the castle.

Once the staff sees the horse return alone, they’ll probably figure out the situation and come rushing, Juliet thought, uncharacteristically relaxed as her gaze drifted back to the sea.

The ocean remained serene.

Would this be the color you’d get if you crushed turquoise and sapphire into fine pieces and mixed them with water? The shimmering surface rippled gently, glinting like thinly sliced opals floating atop it. The sunlight dancing on the waves resembled threads of spun gold, while the clouds overhead looked like the soft, white feathers of a peacock.

Faced with such a lavish, breathtaking view, it felt almost absurd to let her mind wander to trivial worries.

“Shall we walk for a bit?”

“Hmm, all right.”

Juliet took the first step, heading toward the far end of the beach. Cassio followed her at a leisurely pace, his footsteps trailing slightly behind.

Two sets of footprints stretched across the pristine white sand—one small and delicate, the other large and firm.

When she reached a large rock, Juliet turned back to look at him.

Perhaps it was the tilted sunlight, but Cassio’s face appeared faintly flushed. Pretending not to notice, Juliet turned away, brushing the sand off the rock with her hand.

“We should’ve brought a cloth to sit on.”

“It’s fine.”

Having come with nothing but themselves and a single horse, they were entirely unprepared. When Cassio began rummaging through his pockets, Juliet stopped him and sat down on the rock without hesitation.

Seeing her settle so naturally, Cassio soon joined her, sitting about two hand spans away.

That was when Juliet noticed, suddenly and unexpectedly, things she hadn’t been aware of before:

The warmth, and—

“…”

The silence.

The sound of the waves—swoosh—rushing in and retreating, finally registered in her ears. Perhaps the sand mixed with pebbles made the sound more pronounced.

Fidgeting with her clasped hands on her lap, Juliet opened her mouth, speaking without much thought.

“Why did you want to come here?”

It was a casual question, asked mostly to dispel the sudden heat and silence pressing on her.

“I just wanted to see it. You said it was a place you liked.”

The answer caught Juliet off guard.

“…What?”

“You mentioned liking this place. When you were younger.”

“Who told you that?”

Surprised, Juliet turned to him. His quiet exhale escaped through slightly parted lips, accompanied by a faint, weary laugh. Only then did he respond, casually.

“Who knows.”

His words trailed off ambiguously, swallowed by the sound of the waves.

Was it Juan who told him?

Perhaps the family doctor, the head butler, or even the head maid. The Caligari estate was filled with older staff who had served the family for years.

If anyone remembered the places Juliet loved, it would be them. After all, they’d watched her grow up.

Still…

“How did you know? I only came here a few times…”

Muttering to herself, Juliet fell silent again, her gaze sliding to the white sandy beach.

That’s right.

His words stirred a long-forgotten memory.

Juliet had always been a quiet child. Unlike her lively sister, Rosalyn, she was timid and shy, often frightened of strangers or outings beyond the castle walls.

The Duchess of Caligari worried over her timid youngest daughter but also found her lack of boldness disappointing. To address this, she often sent Rosalyn to take Juliet out around Sardinia, showing her different places.

Rocky beaches, Arborea Castle… even picnics by the spring.

But despite being taken outside, Juliet’s personality never changed.

Whenever she left the castle, she would cling to Rosalyn’s shadow, her pale face betraying her discomfort. By the time they returned, Juliet was often so exhausted from chasing her energetic sister that she’d fall asleep as soon as they got back.

Mother, Duchess…

Yes?

Um… I want to go to the beach.

Oh my, what’s this? You actually want to go out?

The only place she had ever shown interest in was this small beach.

The first time she visited had been at the end of summer.

The quiet, secluded cove had no other sounds except the gentle rustling of waves. There were no dramatic cliffs, oddly shaped rocks, or vibrant flowers—just a simple, peaceful beach.

Yet the pure white sand, tucked into the small bay, was so fine that it reminded young Juliet of a pristine white carpet rolled out just for her.

It’s so beautiful… I want to see it again.

Even as a child, she had been captivated by the view, just as she was now.

After that day, little Juliet had fallen in love with the small beach.

I want to go back. Please?

For the first time, she begged her parents and Rosalyn to visit again.

But…

“…Why didn’t we come here more often?”

“Rosalyn didn’t like it.”

The words escaped her lips before she could think. Only after speaking did Juliet recall the reason.

That’s right. She didn’t.

Unlike Juliet, Rosalyn had no affection for this quiet, small beach.

That was why they had rarely come here. Among the three children who had grown up together, Rosalyn Caligari had always held the reins.

“Marchioness of Arborea, you mean.”

“…Yes.”

Rosalyn had been born ambitious and headstrong, with a fiery determination. Juliet, timid and indecisive, and Romeo, somewhat hesitant in nature, had always been swept along by Rosalyn’s will.

Yet Juliet never resented her. In fact, she admired her.

For someone like Juliet, who often found herself lost in the mire of trivial worries and struggled to make decisions on her own, there was no one more remarkable than her sister.

Whether it was sneaking into the castle’s kitchen to steal snacks or exploring the rocky cliffs without their parents’ knowledge, Rosalyn always brimmed with confidence.

“We’ll grab a ton of snacks and eat by the fountain—it’ll be so fun!”

“Climbing the cliffs is amazing! You can see the entire world from up there!”

Her face would light up with an infectious grin as she spoke, shining so brightly that it was impossible not to nod along and smile back.

And so, Juliet followed her. They raided the kitchen, explored the dungeon, and climbed cliffs, often earning scoldings for their antics.

In time, the memories of this small beach, its soft white sands, and the gentle waves faded away, buried beneath the chaos of their adventures.

If only I hadn’t forgotten…

It was a regretful thought. Had she remembered, she might have visited the beach alone while Cassio was away on his expeditions.

Perhaps things would’ve turned out differently.

“Actually, there’s something I’ve been curious about.”

“….”

“May I ask? Of course, if you don’t want to answer, you don’t have to.”

Still feeling slightly dazed, Juliet gave a small nod. Cassio, reassured by the gesture, spoke cautiously.

“On our wedding day, the Marquess and Marchioness of Arborea didn’t attend.”

Juliet flinched, her shoulders drawing inward.

“I’ve always thought it was strange. I’d heard you were incredibly close to the Marchioness and on good terms with the Marquess as well…”

She didn’t ask how he knew.

He must have known from the beginning. The bond between the Caligari sisters and the Arborea family’s son was common knowledge throughout Sardinia.

But Cassio didn’t know what had happened that day—or the night before. Or even further back, before everything changed.

He didn’t know what had unfolded between Juliet, Rosalyn, and Romeo.

“Is that why you left the ball a while ago? Was it because of them?”

Maybe it was because he didn’t know that Juliet found it easier to open up to him.

“Juliet, do you resent them?”

“….”

“Or… are you afraid of them?”

Or perhaps he did know, after all.

Perhaps he understood the feelings that had long settled in her heart, so deeply buried they had turned cold and brittle.

“Are you afraid they’ll betray you again?”

Juliet’s hands gripped her skirt tightly. Without realizing it, her fingers had turned white from the force.

She felt as though the ground beneath her was slipping away.

Ah…

That familiar sense of detachment crept in once more. The eerie sensation of floating, as though she were a ghost. It felt like she was being pulled away from this beautiful world, set adrift.

It had been some time since she last experienced this. Yet, until not long ago, it had been a constant companion.

A feeling unbearably familiar, yet still horrifically alien.

Loneliness.

“Juliet.”

But then her name was spoken. A warm hand wrapped around hers.

“Your hands are so cold.”

The heat of his touch, holding her chilled hands, grounded her again, pulling her back to reality.

“I’m fine…”

“No, you’re not.”

“….”

“Breathe. Come on, now.”

“Haa…”

“Good. Now, lift your head—slowly.”

Juliet let out a small exhale and gradually raised her head, which she hadn’t realized was bowed.

“Ah…”

The same breathtakingly beautiful sight lay before her.

The sparkling blue sea. The pristine white sands, as soft as silk. The waves lapping against the shore, mirroring the shapes of the clouds above. The golden sunlight streaming down.

Taking in the scenery, Juliet spoke without thinking.

“…I’m scared. Scared to face them again.”

“….”

“But it’s not because I hate them or resent them. I did hate them. I did resent them…”

She paused, her voice trembling slightly before continuing.

“It’s because I still love them.”