You Are Gentle, But You Don’t Love Me - Chapter 38

As the long summer day came to an end, the sun prepared to close its eyes.

Instead of beating down from overhead, the sunlight slanted across the ground, and the breeze from the sea gradually cooled the air, which had been thick with heat.

The shimmering haze and the moisture-laden sea breeze clung stickily to the skin in the dusky twilight.

“Why did you run like that? What if you tripped?”

“I’m fine, I’m fine.”

“Fine? Your face is completely red.”

Lately, Juliet and Cassio had taken to walking in the back garden only after sunset, avoiding the harsh midday heat.

That was why Juliet had been able to find him without asking anyone. Simply seeing the orange sunset outside her window, tinting the sky, had been enough.

It was their time together every day—an unspoken promise, even without making one.

“Really, I’m fi—huff….”

“See?”

Fortunately, Cassio seemed to believe that her flushed face was merely the result of running through the stifling air. Rather than correcting him, Juliet rested her hands on her knees, bending forward.

She hadn’t even noticed herself running out of breath while dashing over. Yet, the moment she stopped, her lungs burned, her breath catching painfully in her throat. She steadied herself, focusing on deep, even breaths.

“Haa… haah.”

“Oh, Juliet.”

A soft chuckle rolled down from above her bowed head.

Juliet chose not to reply and instead concentrated on regaining her breath.

“Are you feeling better now?”

“Yes.”

In truth, she needed more time to cool down—not just her breath, but her blushing face as well.

“You can rest a little longer.”

“No, I’m fine now.”

Because as long as Cassio was by her side, she felt like she would never truly settle down.

She preferred to blame it on the run, so she resumed walking.

“Let’s go.”

Even though they walked the same garden every day, the scenery was always slightly different.

The season had already passed for pomegranates to bloom. Scattered among the nameless white wildflowers, the red petals that had fallen lay drying in the breeze rather than crumbling away.

“Did the conversation go well?”

“Hmm…”

“Not so well?”

“No, that’s not it.”

As if she found it strange herself, Juliet kept her eyes fixed on the ground, speaking slowly.

All the while, she ignored the way his fingers naturally intertwined with hers.

“…There wasn’t even a chance to talk. Rosie fell asleep almost immediately.”

“I see.”

“She seemed exhausted. They said she hadn’t eaten properly for three days. I think she spent the whole day crying, too.”

At the end of her words, a faint sigh escaped her lips.

She couldn’t shake the image of Rosaline, sitting there with her eyes half-closed, chewing on a piece of bread.

Cassio, who had been walking beside her in silence, suddenly let out a quiet chuckle.

“I’d say that’s enough.”

His voice carried a smile, as light as breath.

“Though, knowing you, Juliet, it might not feel like enough. Just how much did you want to say?”

“…”

“You’ve had so much to say—how did you even manage to hold it in for so long?”

Juliet couldn’t bring herself to respond. Instead, she pressed her lips together tightly.

Cassio chuckled again, lower this time.

“You really are like the Marchioness of Arborea, Juliet.”

“…That’s not true.”

“No, it is.”

Cassio denied her denial just as easily, whispering as they walked.

“Your hair—curly, thick, though a different color—just like hers. You say otherwise, but even your face resembles hers. The shape of your brows, the sharp line of your nose.”

“…”

“And once you make a decision, you never look back. You’re incredibly affectionate in your own way with those close to you…”

He went on and on, listing the ways the Calliari sisters resembled each other.

Listening to him, one would think Juliet and Rosaline were practically twins.

Juliet didn’t argue. Even if she did, she doubted Cassio would pay it any mind.

And—just maybe—she didn’t mind hearing those words, even if they were empty flattery.

“I probably shouldn’t say this, but even the tiny details are the same.”

“Hey!”

Juliet jerked her arm, trying to shake him off, but Cassio refused to let go.

Instead, his grip tightened, holding her hand firmly.

“Haha. Juliet, you try to act differently, but do you know how impatient you actually are?”

Juliet gave up resisting and let her arm go limp again.

Carefully adjusting his hold on her hand, Cassio murmured softly.

“Once you make up your mind, you want everything settled immediately. Maybe that’s another way you’re like your sister.”

“…”

“But Juliet… it’s okay not to solve everything at once. There’s still time.”

The soft swish of fabric brushing against wild grass.

The feeling of the damp earth compressing beneath their steps.

The golden-orange evening light shimmering in the summer dusk.

“You’ll have plenty of chances to talk again. You can see her whenever you want, Juliet.”

Cassio’s voice was calm and steady, as if stating something obvious.

“And if you’re still afraid to face her alone, I’ll go with you again.”

“…Really?”

“Of course. Didn’t I tell you before?”

He was always like this.

“As long as you want me to, I’ll go anywhere with you.”

And that was why—

“Your Grace.”

Without realizing it, she spoke.

Like a breath she could no longer hold in, a question slipped out.

“Why are you doing all this for me?”

“Hm?”

“I mean… why are you always like this…?”

“…….”

“Why are you so kind to me?”

The moment she voiced it, Juliet thought it was a foolish question.

Cassio had always been kind. From the very first day she met him.

He had watched her bite her fingers until they bled and smiled as he promised everything would be fine. Without hesitation. As if it were the most natural thing in the world.

So of course, Cassio being kind to someone was simply because that was his nature. Why had she felt the need to ask?

“Because I want him to be kind only to me…”

Cassio smiled a moment later, but it wasn’t his usual effortless grin.

His lips barely curved upward. The slight lift of his cheeks trembled, as if strained.

“Juliet, I…”

For once, he looked… nervous.

And at the same time, pained.

“I don’t want to have regrets.”

“…….”

“I don’t want to reach a point in life where nothing can be undone… and mourn the things that can never be changed.”

Like someone who had already experienced that irreversible moment.

“So, I…”

“…Your Grace?”

His slow steps came to a halt.

At some point, they had reached a small fountain—the same one where, on a past evening walk, Juliet had once dipped her hands into the water.

This time, it was Cassio who submerged his hand in its depths.

But he didn’t stop there.

Scooping up a handful of the sun-warmed water, he splashed it over his face without hesitation.

“What are you doing?”

“Ah, it was hot.”

The sun had already begun to set. It wasn’t as if the heat was unbearable.

And yet, did he really need to drench himself like that?

As usual, Cassio was wearing only a thin linen shirt with a light vest.

Now, the unrolled sleeves of his shirt, the fabric across his chest and shoulders—even his hair, damp and slicked back from his forehead—were completely soaked.

“Good heavens…”

He looked as though he had been caught in a sudden downpour—alone.

“If you were that hot, you should have just said something. Or at least—”

“I’m not hot anymore. It’s refreshing.”

Cassio might have felt refreshed, but now Juliet was the one overheating.

The wet fabric clung to his skin, faintly revealing the lines of his muscles, the contours of his frame.

“You should go back and change. Your clothes—”

“They’ll dry soon enough.”

“Well, yes, but…”

Just as she was mumbling and about to look away, Cassio ran a hand through his damp hair and grinned.

“Juliet, have I been kind enough to you?”

His face, like a statue of a young warrior from mythology, twisted into a playful, radiant smile.

Under his softly curved eyelids, his light green eyes gleamed—

Burnished orange like the setting sun.

Faint yellow like the twilight sky.

Or flickering gold, catching the last light of day.

“Hmm? What do you think?”

“…You are kind. Excessively so.”

His eyes had always glowed under the sunlight, but she had never seen them reflect so many colors before.

Of course.

After all, eyes were such small things, too small to contain so many colors at once.

“Ah, that can’t be.”

“…….”

“There’s no such thing as too much. No matter how much I do, it will never be enough.”

And yet, perhaps—

At times, even something so small could hold an infinite depth.

“Still, I’m glad.”

Because when Juliet said those words, Cassio smiled.

And yet, at the same time, he looked sorrowful.

He seemed happy—then burdened.

He gazed straight ahead, but it felt as though he was lost in some distant past.

He looked as if he had long since resigned himself to something, yet yearned for it all the same.

In the briefest moment—too quick for even a blink—countless emotions flickered across his eyes.

Despair and longing. Disappointment and joy.

Fading into the distance, only to be drawn back again.

“…Ah.”

As Juliet stared at him, mesmerized, a sudden thought crossed her mind.

Under the pale hues of a midsummer sunset—

If love could be seen with the eyes, would it shine in as many colors as this?

Could someone in love hold such a spectrum of emotions in their gaze?

If so, then perhaps…

Perhaps, he truly loved someone.

“Not me.”

Not Juliet.

Someone else.