You Are Gentle, But You Don’t Love Me - Chapter 54

“Did you… confess?”

It was a whisper, barely audible, yet it left her breathless. Juliet’s gaze dropped to the ground.

“You said you liked me…”

“…….”

“Or was I mistaken?”

He didn’t answer for a long time.

A step away, Cassio must have been looking down at her. Juliet couldn’t bring herself to face him directly. Instead, she fidgeted with her fingers—though even that was difficult, as Cassio still held her hand tightly. Because of that, she couldn’t move her hand freely.

She had no idea how much time had passed. Even the distant cries of birds had momentarily ceased.

Then—

“Hahaha!”

Cassio suddenly burst into laughter.

His laughter was so loud that somewhere, a startled bird flapped its wings and took flight. Yet even after the sound of wings faded, Cassio couldn’t stop laughing.

It was only then that Juliet realized what she had just said.

“…….”

Her face burned. The heat spread beyond her ears, flushing her cheeks and even the nape of her neck. The embarrassment she couldn’t contain stung at the corners of her eyes.

‘I should have just kept quiet…’

Had she really confessed to him last night? Even if she had, it was a problem. Her first confession would have been in her sleep, and the second, blurted out in a moment of confusion. Of course, even if neither had happened, it would still be a problem.

‘Why did I bring it up? This is ridiculous… I look like a fool.’

It was the first time she’d seen Cassio laugh so freely. She supposed it made sense. Even to her, what she’d done seemed utterly foolish.

‘But still, does he really have to laugh this much?’

As Juliet began to pout, Cassio let out another peal of laughter. He only stopped when she was on the verge of tears.

“Oh no, Juliet. Are you mad?”

“…….”

“I’m sorry. That was my fault.”

“…….”

“Look at me, will you?”

His voice, still tinged with amusement, coaxed her gently. Reluctantly, Juliet lifted her gaze.

What met her eyes was a pair of clear, light-green irises, reminiscent of early summer leaves.

‘Ah…’

A sense of déjà vu washed over her.

Bathed in the bright morning sunlight, Cassio’s face was filled with emotions—countless hues and countless lights flickering in his eyes. Some were old and faded, yet others remained as vivid as ever.

She had seen that expression before.

She had seen the love in his eyes sparkle as he lifted water in his hands from a flowing fountain.

‘Why…?’

Why do you look at me now with the same eyes?

“I laughed too much, didn’t I? I’m really sorry.”

“…….”

“If I told you I laughed because I was happy, would you believe me?”

“…….”

“You won’t even give me that much? What should I do to make it up to you, my Juliet?”

Her gaze dropped again, settling on his hand, which still held hers firmly. His grip was tight enough that his knuckles had turned white, yet Juliet, held within that grasp, felt none of the force.

It had always been this way.

Cassio had always touched her with the gentleness of someone afraid she might shatter at the slightest pressure.

‘Yes, and because of that…’

Perhaps it meant he liked her, even just a little.

Maybe—just maybe—Cassio Bellanea liked her, even if only a little.

‘At least, that’s what I thought…’

“Juliet.”

Her vision shifted. It was because he moved, not her.

Still holding her hand, Cassio bent down on one knee. His clothes brushed against the earth, heedless of the grass and dirt that clung to them. He looked like a man making a solemn vow before a sacred altar.

Lowering himself before her, he briefly averted his gaze, as if realizing the moment was more embarrassing than he had anticipated.

But only for a moment.

Soon, he looked up at her again and smiled—softly, sweetly.

“I’m serious. I laughed because I was happy. Because you told me you liked me.”

“I… I didn’t say it like that….”

Her words trailed off awkwardly, all because of that smile.

It was the kind of smile that felt like biting into a sugar-dusted cookie or tasting a cherry drenched in syrup. A smile so unbearably sweet.

“Ah, so it was my misunderstanding?”

“…….”

“Did I twist your words into something I wanted to hear?”

“You… you wanted to hear that?”

“Of course I did.”

It was because of that smile—because he looked at her like that.

It made her wonder—just maybe—if he truly did like her.

Maybe… just maybe, a little more than she had thought.

“There are no words that could make me happier than that.”

“Then…”

The words slipped out before she could stop them.

Because she had let her guard down just a little.

Because she felt just a little relieved.

“Then why have you been avoiding me all this time?”

“Avoiding you? How could I ever—”

“Liar.”

For the past few days, he hadn’t shown himself before her. It had been driving her mad. And before that, he had reminisced about an old love—right in front of her. He had traced back moments of that love and, in some way, overlaid them onto her.

He had left her feeling so utterly wretched.

“You avoided me… I—I searched everywhere for you.”

And yet, now that he knew she liked him, he said he was happy. He said there was no greater joy than that.

Juliet had spent restless days fearing that he had already realized her feelings, that he had chosen to avoid her because he didn’t want to accept them. That he didn’t want to accept her love at all.

Her voice wavered with sorrow. She knew, logically, that she was making yet another mistake by speaking without thinking, but once she started, she couldn’t stop. The emotions from the past few days poured out without restraint.

“You never once came to see me…”

“Oh, Juliet. It sounds like you’re saying something I’d very much like to misunderstand.”

“…….”

“Did you search for me? Because you couldn’t see me?”

Yet Cassio, who bore the brunt of her sorrow, only smiled—brighter than ever, as if he had never been happier. As if he were truly, deeply joyful. Just from hearing that Juliet had been searching for him, he looked like that.

“What should I do? I think I might start laughing again. This makes me so happy.”

But why? Why did he look at her like that? Why did he say such things?

Did he—could he possibly—love her?

‘No.’

That was impossible.

She knew that. Cassio would never love her. He was always kind to her, but in the end, he would never love her.

She never realized how strange it was to be so sure of something like that. That belief had taken root in her mind like an unshakable truth. But in reality, it was nothing more than a sandcastle built on uncertain ground.

Still, she had believed it.

Like an age-old divine proverb. Like an undeniable law of nature, carved deep into her bones.

It had seemed so absolute, so unbreakable, that she never once doubted it was a sandcastle.

“Why… why did you do that?”

“Juliet.”

“I thought… I thought you had come to hate me.”

But a sandcastle crumbles at the touch of even the gentlest wave.

“That could never happen.”

“But…”

“You have no idea how much I longed to see you.”

And just like that, Cassio once again pulled her into a world that was impossibly beautiful—too dreamlike to feel real.

Into love.

“Juliet, I wake at dawn. Since it’s summer, the sun rises early. When I open my eyes, the world outside my window is already bathed in light. And as I watch that light, I think of you. I think of the moment when the light is at its brightest, when the afternoon sun is at its peak—because that’s when I’ll see you.”

“…….”

“Every day, I think of you like that. Every day, I wait for you.”

Emotion surged through her, tightening around her chest. Juliet couldn’t even open her mouth.

But in that moment, something that had been lodged deep inside her, something that had long weighed down her heart and throat, began to melt away.

That lingering fear.

That twisted certainty she had always carried—

That no one would ever love her.

That, in the end, they would all find another love and leave her behind.

‘Ah… I see.’

The reason she had convinced herself Cassio could never love her—

It wasn’t just doubt.

‘I was preparing myself for when he would leave me, too. I was sure that the one he truly loved… would never be me.’

Because that was how it had always been.

From the moment she was born, Juliet had lived in Rosalyn’s shadow. Not once had she been chosen first. She had never been the subject of admiration, let alone love.

‘Ah, the second daughter of House Calliari?’

That was how they always referred to her.

And she had told herself it was fine.

She had a sister she loved. She had people she thought would be with her forever. People who looked her in the eye, greeted her warmly, and smiled with her.

‘Juliet!’

‘Juliet.’

People who called her name.

But in the end, even the sister she adored, even the childhood friends she had dreamed of a future with, chose others and left her behind.

No one stayed.

And so she had come to believe it. That no one would ever truly love her. That even if they lingered for a while, eventually, they would leave.

That Juliet Calliari would always, inevitably, be left alone.

But in hindsight—

Was that belief ever truly justified?

‘No.’

When she was younger, Juliet’s world had been small and self-contained. She had a sister who always pulled her out of the shadows and into the light. She had a friend who held her close when she was scared, comforting her with a warm voice.

Back then, she thought that world had completely shattered. That everyone had left her. That no one loved her.

But now, she knew the truth.

That world had never disappeared.

It had only grown wider.

“Juliet, I…”

Cassio, who had uttered so many embarrassingly romantic words with ease until now, suddenly hesitated.

His gaze dropped, lingering on their hands—still tightly clasped together, never once letting go.